Grandma’s Ruthless ‘Grandkid Ranking Board’ Goes Viral

Don’t mess with grandma

If there’s one thing grandkids can count on, it’s the love of their grandparents. And while comedian Dan LaMorte knows his grandma loves him, on any given day, he just might not be her fave.

In a now-viral TikTok video, LaMorte shares that his grandma, Mary Francis, actually keeps a ranking board with all 10 of her grandkids pictured—and she freely moves them up and down the ranks. At the start of the video, he was in the coveted fourth spot, “the highest I’ve ever been,” he says.

But it didn’t last long.

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“I did just get two new tattoos though, so I’m a bit nervous about what that’s going to do for my ranking,” LaMorte says. Then he pulls up his sleeve to reveal his new artwork, to the tune of his grandma’s gasps. “This is what I think of your new tattoos,” she says. And then LaMorte is promptly demoted to number 10.

The comedian got plenty of love when he shared the video on TikTok, but there were some viewers who didn’t like the idea of a grandma ranking her grandchildren. In an interview with WGN, they shared that someone even called Mary Francis, also known as Nanny, a “Savage Grandma.” Savagely funny, yes.

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Viewers got to see the funny side of Nanny when she and Dan sat down with WGN to share more about the ranking system. Apparently, all the grandkids move themselves to number one when they visit, but she promptly returns them to their proper place when they leave.

So what do you have to do to make it to numero uno? According to Nanny, you have to live across the street, do daily visits and play Wordle, or become a veterinarian. No small tasks, but hey, she makes the rules.