A viral TikTok is shutting down all the people who put the onus on adult kids who have gone ‘no contact’ with their parents to repair things
As much as anyone would like to have a good relationship with their parents, sadly, it isn’t always possible. Adult children raised by abusers and narcissists already know this all too well—and now, one of them is speaking out in a viral TikTok directed at anyone who’s ever told an adult child who has gone no contact with their parents that they should get back in touch.
TikToker Chassity Marchal has been open on the video-sharing platform about her strained relationship with her mom, and how, after she realized her mom’s patterns of abuse weren’t going to change, she decided to go no contact. In a viral video, she spoke out about making that difficult decision for herself and offered support for others who find themselves in similar positions.
@chatswithchass Just because someone is “family” doesnt mean they can treat someone anyways they want. #chatswithchass
♬ original sound – Chats with Chass
“Stop telling people who are no contact with their parents that they need to make things right, they need to talk to their parents, that that’s your mom, how can you just not talk to her?” Marchal starts her video, before sharing that someone told her that her mom “isn’t guaranteed tomorrow” as a way to encourage Marchal to reestablish contact.
“I have 26 years’ worth of things that have happened,” Marchal explained. “I just know that if it was my husband that was saying or doing the things that my mom has done, that y’all would not be telling me that I need to stay with him and talk to him and make it work. So why is it different when it comes to parents?”
This is a really important point. Any adult is allowed to cut any abuser out of their life, at any time and for any reason. Going no contact with a parent can be the safest choice, just like leaving an abusive partner would be.
Marchal continues, “I have boundaries. I’m not gonna let people treat me just whichever way they want to treat me. Also, keep in mind that being no contact with my mom was not an easy decision for me. It was not something I wanted to do or that I took lightly. I’m still not happy about it. I don’t want to be doing this. But I’m also putting myself first and doing what I feel is best.”
Amen.
