I knew our cruise was going to be a success as soon as we found the candy bar at the Social Club on night one. Without a word spoken, we both grabbed bags to fill with red licorice and gummy bears and a side bag for some salty popcorn. We had just finished up a night of karaoke and were ready to tuck in to our cabin on the Resilient Lady, our home for seven nights as we sailed around Greece and Sicily and Spain. It was maybe 10 pm—the ship’s nightlife was just shifting into full steam ahead.
Not for us though. For these two moms, longtime friends but first-time travel companions, we wanted our pajamas. A glass of wine delivered to the room. Candy, popcorn, and a rewatch of Mamma Mia ahead of our morning arrival in Mykonos. Curled up on our single beds, our room decorated with scarves and straw hats and colorful clothes we would never wear back at home, we relaxed into this new stage of our lives. We prepared for a week without partners or kids or anything to define us other than… us. And it worked right away.
No longer just “mom friends.” Now we were turning into “friend friends.”
S and I first met when our kids started kindergarten more than 20 years ago. We followed the usual pattern of these friendships. Chatting while the kids played turned into longer chats as they headed into the classroom in the morning. This turned into cafe hangs then walks then movies with our little group of mom friends. We talked about our kids, our worries, our parents, our recipes. And a part of me worried, as our kids grew up and away and independent of us in all the right ways, if our friendship could survive the loss of them to their own lives.
And so we decided to go on a 7-day cruise from Athens to Barcelona together. An adults-only cruise on a sleek and shiny Virgin Voyages ship no less, which felt fitting for us as we try to figure out how to live in a bit of an adults-only world. The voyage took us from Athens to the sun-bleached island of Mykonos before heading off to Catania in Sicily, Palma de Mallorca, Valencia, and finally Barcelona in Spain. We had our planning sessions ahead of the cruise. We talked outfits, especially for Virgin’s infamous Scarlet Night themed-party. We talked excursions, and S said over snacks on her deck, “Let me figure something out for Mykonos.” The gift of having someone else plan literally anything for me. Delightful.
Finding our groove together and apart.
Almost immediately we found a rhythm. Two moms with eight children between us, it should not have come as a surprise that we would know how to go with the flow. We were happy to eat at any or all of the restaurants. Mexican food with a side of ambience at Pink Agave, genuinely excellent Italian food at Extra Virgin, a casual burger at Razzle Dazzle. Dinner was easy and always eaten together. Breakfast was different. One of us would sleep in while the other might go to sunrise yoga or visit the state-of-the-art gym, truly the best I’ve ever seen at sea. One of us might try a fun exercise class like my personal favorite, the ‘80s-themed aerobics VHS Workout class, while the other read a book on the deck. This was the key to a beautiful holiday. Time apart to nap or wander the ship or soak in one of the hot tubs (Richard’s Rooftop hot tub was another personal favorite, especially on busy at-sea days). We always reconvened for a fun debrief or a chat, almost always over food. Some fresh peach ice cream from Lick Me ‘Til…Ice Cream or crispy wood-fired pizza from The Pizza Place.
Food, it turned out, was our true common denominator in all things. Especially on a cruise ship where there were so many options and neither of us had to cook a thing.
Making the most of our excursions.
Something almost always slips through the cracks when you are planning a trip, and this was the case with booking our excursions. We (figuratively) missed the boat on booking excursions through Virgin before they all sold out, and so we rolled with it. Between the two of us, we ended up finding a real blend of culture, sightseeing, and (of course) food. In Catania, we met two fellow cruisers for a street food tour of the Sicilian port city. We started the day with cones of salty fried seafood straight from the local market, washed down with cold beers. We went on to try an enormous arancina, some excellent gelato, a glass of Sicilian wine that was so good I brought a few bottles back to the ship. And of course, we ate the local favorite. Cannoli. The colorful city of Palma de Mallorca was a self-guided tour along the same wavelength, but with enough wiggle room in the timing to try on buttery-soft leather shoes in every color.
In Valencia we booked a cycling tour of the city that was hectic and exciting and energetic enough to earn us a table full of tapas at the end of the day.
Every port visit was like a little appetizer, a moment to dip our toe into a new culture and wonder what it would be like to come back. With each other, yes, but also with the families we had left behind. Our conversations about our kids became reflective as we explored. That distance, that time together, shifted our perspectives. Instead of feeling untethered without our kids, we connected as actual adults.
By the time we made our way to Barcelona, we were new old friends with stories to tell. About Scarlet Night, when we jumped into the pool to dance, fully dressed, under the moon like the wild young things we had probably never been the first time around. About the new friends we made over cocktails and music and silliness. We really just embraced all of that silliness.
And we would do it again, with or without the kids.
