This week in funny tweets has us laughing at parents trying to make it through the second half of the school year, handling picky eaters and navigating Girl Scout cookie season. Keep reading to see our favorites.
1. Because #momlife.
If anyone ever steals our minivan they would not just be getting a van. They’d be getting at least 3 shoes, 12 winter coat sizes 2T and up, 88 hair ties, 2 lip glosses, Chic Fil A and Sweet and Sour sauce, a pink unicorn, a whole P&J sandwich and half of a a glazed donut.
— Cydni Beer (@cydbeer) February 2, 2019
2. Just one of many rules you never thought you’d make!
Had to make “Don’t lick the baby” a rule because toddlers are really, really weird.
— Unfiltered Mama 💗✌️ (@UnfilteredMama) February 2, 2019
3. This hits close to home.
Me: *in September, spends 3 hours meticulously writing down the school holidays/closings for each kid with gel pens of different colors and feels super organized and accomplished afterwards*
— Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) February 4, 2019
Also me: *in February*
“wait, what do you mean there’s no school tomorrow?”
4. Gotta keep them humble.
I firmly believe life needs balance.
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) February 4, 2019
Like the other day, my oldest used the potty and threw his hands up in celebration.
Then proceeded to fall off the toilet.
Balance. Because no one likes a braggart.
5. 🤐
My deepest fear:
— Mommy Owl (@Mommy__Owl) February 5, 2019
5.
4.
3.
2.
1. My kids open the lid of our trashcan and discover what I’ve been doing with all of their art projects.
6. A moment of silence.
Thoughts and prayers for my daughter, who suffered the devastating loss of the peanut butter being on the “wrong” slice of bread in her P&J sandwich, which has now ruined her entire life.
— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) February 6, 2019
7. Same.
I'm not proud of the person I become when my family eats the last of the Girl Scout cookies.
— Scary Mommy (@ScaryMommy) February 5, 2019
8. Do as I say, not as I do.
“We don’t wear what we slept in out in public”
— AsKateWouldHaveIt (@KateWouldHaveIt) February 7, 2019
-Me, lying to my child
9. Now THAT is a princess of the people.
We need a Disney princess that screams when her hair is brushed, gets super amped right before bed, and eats like 3 things for dinner ever.
— fredesque (@FredTaming) February 6, 2019
10. Goals.
Came out of my room wearing a pair of pajamas that actually matched and my daughter said "Wow Mom, your pants match your shirt!" This is the legacy I'm leaving behind. I hope my kids still speak of this day fondly years from now.
— Lauren Mullen (@DraggingFeeties) February 7, 2019
11. Livin’ that parent life.
If you've ever considered painting red crosses over all of the creaky floorboards in your house, you may be a parent.#parenting #dadlife
— Dadding Around (@DaddingAround) February 7, 2019
12. THANK YOU.
https://twitter.com/om_eye_goodness/status/1093307865702387712
––Karly Wood
Photo by Ryan McGuire via Gratisography
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