We’ve all been there, swapping stories with parent friends about the quirky things toddlers do only to be met with polite smiles and crickets when you share your kiddo’s newfound love of dumpster diving. Rest assured, you’re not alone. Toddlers get up to some bizarre stuff, and even though these new behaviors can feel unusual and even alarming, each one is likely serving an important purpose. We spoke to experts to break down some of the weirder behaviors your toddler may exhibit and explain how they’re part of your tot’s developmental journey—plus, how to know when to tap your pediatrician for support.
1. Rocking back and forth
If you notice your toddler rocking back and forth while watching TV or playing with their toys, it’s probably because not only does this common behavior feel good, but it also helps them explore their balance and space. “It’s the older kid version of being rocked to sleep as a baby,” notes Dr. Lauren O’Connell, clinical assistant professor of developmental and behavioral pediatrics at C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital in Michigan. It also activates the vestibular system, which helps the body sense how it’s moving and how things around it are moving to maintain balance. “We learn as we get older to do this in less obvious ways, but rocking in toddlers is activating that vestibular sense,” explains O’Connell, who notes that while normal, this action should be brought to your doctor’s attention if your toddler is “literally always doing it or if it’s interfering with other activities.”
2. Constantly sucking on a stuffed toy or blanket
When your toddler can’t seem to keep their favorite lovey out of their mouth, whether it’s a blanket, a stuffed toy, or an article of clothing, it’s simply their means of learning to self-soothe. “It’s a way that a child reassures themselves,” says Dr. Paul Lipkin, a neurodevelopmental pediatrician at the Kennedy Krieger Institute’s Center for Development and Learning. “They get a lot of comfort from putting things in their mouth and that object is a representation of something that’s a comfort to them.” As long as the item in question poses no danger to their health or well-being, it’s totally fine to let them soothe away.
3. Always trying to change something about a parent’s appearance
From snatching your glasses away to pulling your hat off to destroying the bun you spent an hour perfecting, little kids’ hands are fast and persistent. While this behavior might seem like a game, it’s actually helping them learn how to establish control. “These things disrupt their understanding of the image they have of you,” explains Lipkin, who is also a professor of pediatrics at The Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine. “If [your appearance] changes, some children can get a little disoriented or uncomfortable. It’s a way for a child to order their world.” This extends to huge makeovers, like cutting hair really short or shaving off beards. O’Connell adds, “It can be very upsetting when this person who you love the most in the world is suddenly kind of semi-unrecognizable to you, or not what you were expecting.” If your child is consistently unconsolable with any changes to your appearance, have a chat with their pediatrician to see if something else is contributing to their reaction.
4. Refusing to take off a piece of clothing or accessory
Similar to wanting to control their guardian’s appearance, toddlers learn and practice the act of control when they insist on wearing their bike helmet or that t-shirt that’s two sizes too small every. single. day. “This could start as a comfort or preference, and then if there’s some kind of reaction from the parent, it then makes it more of a control issue,” explains O’Connell. If a kiddo gets a reaction from their parent they are more likely to keep doing this behavior since they don’t distinguish between positive and negative attention (it’s all attention as far as they’re concerned!). What’s the best way to handle this? “With this stuff, giving them as much control as possible, especially in things like clothing and what they put on their body.” And downplay it as much as possible, because we promise they’ll tire of that princess dress on their own eventually.
5. Wanting to walk backwards or on their tippy-toes
“This is the age when they’re figuring out walking, running, and jumping, so kids have all kinds of odd and fun ways of moving around. It truly is an exploration,” says O’Connell. While this is a totally normal behavior in toddlers, O’Connell notes that it is “something we ask about in an autism screening. But it’s usually more of a concern in older kids.” Lipkin stresses that the key distinction here is “wanting.” If a toddler wants to walk backwards or wants to walk on their toes, they are exploring their balance and their ability to move. But if these behaviors appear to be involuntary, there may be an issue with their muscle tone. You can always speak to your doctor to ease any worries.
6. Rummaging through the garbage
A toddler’s curiosity knows no bounds—and at this age that desire to explore can take them to the strangest of places, including your trash can. “It’s exploratory,” notes Lipkin. “They don’t associate garbage as being a bad thing. It’s just a receptacle which they find interesting.” To them, it’s like another cupboard with a nice mix of treasures. If you’re worried you have a baby trash panda on your hands, Lipkin assures that “at some point, they will learn that it’s frowned upon.” Now that’s not to say they should be getting their paws on garbage all the time. O’Connell advises you may want to speak to your pediatrician about it if it becomes “a habit that is out of proportion” with other behaviors and if the interest extends outside a familiar place, like their home.
7. Wanting to smell everything (or one item in particular)
If you’ve walked in on your tot smelling a shoe, noticed them regularly sniffing everything they can reach, or find they’re always trying to take a whiff of your skin or hair and thought Why?!, let’s dissect. “At this age, everything is being used to explore and sniffing is part of that,” says O’Connell. “Exploration usually starts orally and then once something’s up by their face, they’re going to smell it.” It can also be a self-soothing tool if you notice they are particularly drawn to sniffing a particular item like a stuffed toy. “Knowing something smells the same is actually one of the ways that kids will identify their lovey,” explains O’Connell. In fact, its scent is so comforting to them that you may notice your child rejecting their beloved possession after a turn in the wash or when you try to replace a lost lovey (perish the thought!). If their little nose continues to work overtime past the toddler age, mention it to your pediatrician so they can keep an eye on it.
Remember, kids will do quirky things throughout their childhood—it’s just that which weird habits you describe to your friends will regularly change. If you’re concerned that a particular behavior is more than just a fleeting phase, both Lipkin and O’Connell note three factors to keep in mind: frequency, longevity, and if the actions are interfering with everyday activities like eating, playing, napping, and establishing relationships.
And while everything in our children’s world can seem heightened as a parent, try to keep an objective outlook. “I would encourage parents to challenge their own black-and-white thinking. Like, is this really always happening, or is it just happening more than I expected?” says O’Connell. So you’re probably just going to have to embrace the quirk. But there’s a silver lining: it’ll make a hilarious story in your speech at their wedding one day.
