8-Year-Olds Are the Most Difficult to Parent, According to Poll

The "hateful eights?" Oh no.

By Christina Marfice December 6, 2022

Portrait Of Multi-Cultural Children Posing And Hanging Out With Friends In Countryside Together

Move over, terrible twos—according to a survey of parents, this is the most difficult age

Every stage of parenting comes with its own challenges. But if you’re breathing a sigh of relief after making it past the patience-testing days of parenting a two-, three-, or four-year-old, you might want to stop reading now. A survey of parents found that those famously tough ages aren’t actually the worst. More parents actually said that eight-year-olds are the most difficult kids to parent.

The 2020 survey was conducted by OnePoll and sponsored by Mixbook. It asked 2,000 parents what year was the most difficult for them, and the majority agreed that the challenges that come with parenting an eight-year-old really caught them off guard. Many referred to this time period as the “hateful eights,” noting that their kiddos reached unprecedented levels of tantrum intensity at this age.

And if you think about it, it kind of makes sense.

After all, eight-year-olds are decidedly “big kids.” They’re still too young for a lot of things, but they’re also becoming individual people—and trying really hard to establish their individuality and independence. Eight-year-olds may also be starting to experience some of the hormones that come just before and right into puberty, which can make this time even more emotional. While these kids might think (and act like) they’re too big to need their parents anymore, they really do just need some love and reassurance from mom and dad sometimes.

So if your kid is rolling their eyes, slamming doors, or acting like their chores are an absolute injustice, remember that they’re just acting their age. And while it’s difficult to parent an eight-year-old, it’s just as difficult to be an eight-year-old.

For parents with littles who are now looking ahead with some trepidation, don’t worry—the parents’ poll offered some insight you might be glad to hear. Many parents agreed that age six was “better than expected,” so that’s something to look forward to! Just be sure to soak it in before year seven, when parents said tantrums noticeably intensified.