If you find yourself on chaperone duty for a school field trip or want to pep up mealtime with your kids, the best way to keep them entertained is to have silly jokes on the ready. Even if they’re not SNL-quality, the kids will love the cheese. They’ll hover on the edge of their seats (figuratively), waiting for you to deliver the wholesome punchlines. For an easy and free way to entertain kids, here are some tried and true Chicago-themed jokes that will make them chuckle.
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1. What do you call a loud person from Chicago?
Illinoisy.
2. How are the Blackhawk players paid?Â
With a check.
3. What did Lake Michigan say to the sand?
Nothing, it just waved.
4. Where do Bears players go to dance?
The Foot Ball.
5. Where are baby chicks born?
In Chick-cago.
6. What do you call a neighborhood that can't stand still?
Wrigleyville.
7. How did the Chicago hot dog get a date with the ketchup?
He mustard up the courage to ask.
8. What runs around Wrigley Field but never moves?
The wall.
9. What does a Chicago pizza wear to smell good?
Calzogne.
10. What type of person doesn’t like deep-dish pizza?
A weir-dough.
11. Why was Chicago blushing at the party?
Because it's ShyTown.
12. Which Chicago Fire player has the biggest cleats?
The one with the biggest feet.
13. Why can't a man living in New York be buried in Chicago?
Because he's still alive.
14. What is the tallest building in Chicago?
The library, because it has so many stories.
15. What do runners eat before the Chicago marathon?
Nothing! They fast!
16. Why did the White Sox hire a baker?
They needed a good batter.
17. Why was Hamilton in Chicago cancelled in the winter?
Because, once again, Brrr killed Hamilton.
18. Why was the magician selected as a forward for the Blackhawks?Â
The coach was impressed by his hat-tricks.
19. Why can’t Bulls players go on vacation?
They aren’t allowed to travel.
20. What runs but never walks?
The Chicago River
— Debra Flanagan
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