You have a brand new person in your house, which can sometimes feel overwhelming. Is your child reaching all their milestones? Does it matter that they skipped crawling and went straight to walking? Is colic untreatable and will the crying ever end?
On top of all the worrying, we’d bet you’re getting lots of “advice” and opinions from friends and fellow parents, your own parents, daycare providers, and social media, telling you what you should and shouldn’t be stressed about. It’s hard to know what’s “normal” and what’s worthy of a chat with your pediatrician. Sometimes, you need a bit of a gut check with an expert.
@milestonemama I could actually do like 25 parts to this series. So much that i wanted to talk about 😅 #babytok #momtok #babytiktok #momsoftiktok #babystuff #newborn #tummytime #colic #crawling
♬ original sound – Dr Bonnie | Baby PT
Baby and toddler physical therapist Dr. Bonnie knows just how much information is being thrown at moms and dads all the time, so she took to her popular TikTok to share nine things she wished baby parents knew, and it was quite enlightening. Here are her recommendations:
- Colic is not normal. “You do not have to just wait for your baby to grow out of that. You need support, and you need, maybe, a lactation consultant, somebody who will check out their oral motor function [and] their latch and maybe dive a little deeper into what their whole body is doing.” So if you’re suffering through hours of crying and feeling totally helpless, there may be supports out there that you didn’t know about. In the comments, here’s what Bonnie suggests: “Get a functional oral motor evaluation or a feeding evaluation from IBCLC, OT, SLP, or PT. That’s the first step.”
- Growing out of a head-turning preference or flat spot is not a good idea. This is something that should be addressed with your pediatrician and then a physical therapist, as it might mean your baby needs helmet therapy.
- Tummy time is part of a bigger picture. “It doesn’t have to be the only thing that you do with your child during the day. It is also important for them to [lie] on their backs. It is also important for them to [lie] on their side.” Rolling your baby in and out of tummy time also helps to develop important core muscles. In the end, variety is key and you don’t have to work yourself into a tizzy over tummy time, though you should include it in the mix of positions your newborn experiences daily.
- It’s okay to pop them in a container so you can take a shower or eat a meal. You may have seen the term “container baby syndrome” floating around your mom groups, but you don’t have to worry about plopping your baby into a containment device like an exersaucer or activity center here and there so you can get something done or take care of yourself. That being said, Bonnie stresses that we want variety, so they shouldn’t be in there for extended periods of time.
- Offer teethers ASAP. “As soon as your baby starts grasping a toy and trying to bring things to their mouth, give them teethers. They’re working on oral motor function. They’re working on pre-feeding skills. Give them stuff to put in their mouth. We want them to explore toys in their mouth.”
- A four-month-old should not use an exersaucer, jumper, or walker. It seems that some parents get ahead of themselves where standing and walking are concerned. “[A four-month-old] shouldn’t be standing. They should be able to take weight through their legs, maybe at that age.” By six months, babies should be able to bear weight through their legs when placed in a standing position, but they shouldn’t be standing—if they look like they are, it’s probably the result of tension or stiffness in those little legs.
- Crawling is important. “If we’re seeing red flags that they’re having a hard time with tummy time skills, rolling skills, moving in the direction of crawling, it’s time to get support,” Bonnie suggests. “Just because some things have become very common does not mean that it is normal.”
- Everyone should be sleeping with their mouth closed. The optimal sleeping position is mouth closed and tongue at the roof of your mouth. Children, babies, and even adults should not be snoring or mouth-breathing while they snooze, so if you’re noticing that your baby does this it’s best to have it checked out so you can try to correct it.
- There is no prize for your child walking early. “I highly, highly recommend and much prefer a baby to get to crawling and crawl for many months before they even get to walking. Just because your baby is pulling to stand, there are actually a lot of mini milestones in between pulling up, then standing, and taking independent steps or walking. It can take months.”
Ultimately, if you have a question about whether your baby is developing appropriately, it never hurts to ask your pediatrician. That’s what they’re there for! And a little peace of mind—and a clear path to dealing with any baby concern—is good medicine for anxious parents.
