Tickle Your Funny Bone: 20 Jokes for Bay Area Kids

1. What do you call a seagull living in San Francisco?

A baygull.

2. Why is it so cold in San Francisco?

Giant fans.

3. It took 10 workers 10 days to build the Golden Gate Bridge.  How long would it take 5 workers to build the same bridge?

None—it’s already built!

—Liam, age 7 

4. Which 49ers player can jump higher than a house?

All of them—houses can’t jump at all.

5. Where do you find hungry 49ers?

The golden arches.

6. What card game do Niners fans play?

Golden Gate Bridge.

7. What runs around Levi’s Stadium but never moves?

A wall. 

8. What did 49ers fans think about the new lights at Levi’s Stadium?

They gave them GLOWING reviews.

9. Who put all these mountains in California?

It wasn’t me, it was all San Andreas’ fault!

10. What was the earthquake's punishment?

It was grounded.

11. What happens when you get nervous during an earthquake? 

You start shaking uncontrollably.

12. What's the safest place to be during an earthquake? 

A stationary store.

13. What did one earthquake say to the other?

It's not my fault!

14. What's the worst nightmare of an Etch-A-Sketch artist?

An earthquake.

15. What do you get when there’s an earthquake at a cow pasture?

Milk shakes.

16. Did you hear about the recent earthquake research?

The information is groundbreaking.

17. What did the ground say to the earthquake?

You crack me up.

18. Where do you find missing angels?

Lost Angeles

19. Where do waffles go on vacation?

Sandy Eggo.

20. Where in California does everyone have minty fresh breath?

Sacra-mentos.