Tired of yelling at your kids? A children’s behavior specialist suggests you try the “whisper technique” instead
Getting kids to listen to their parents has been a struggle since the dawn of time. And if you find yourself raising your voice to higher and higher decibels in a desperate attempt to make it happen, you’re going to want to watch this TikTok about the revolutionary “whisper technique.”
It comes to us courtesy of Samantha Day, a children’s behavior specialist and certified sleep consultant. She’s going viral for her video on the subject, where she explains what the “whisper technique” is and how parents can use it as an alternative to yelling to get their kids to listen to them for a change.
“So we’re yelling at our children and yelling and yelling and yelling, and no matter what we say or how many times we say it or how mad we get, they’re not listening,” Day says. “For many children, we call this a behavioral routine. They’ve gotten to a place where they don’t feel like they even need to listen to what you’re saying or yelling about. You’re white noise in the background, until you’ve reached a certain level of yelling or until you’ve asked a certain amount of times.”
Um, moms, raise your hands if that’s relatable. (All moms raise their hands.)
Day goes on to explain that the “whisper technique” is one way you can break your kids’ behavioral routines so you no longer fade into the background for them.
“For many parent-child relationships, the only way to get out of this behavioral routine is to create a new one—something totally different than they’ve ever seen before that’s going to snap us out of that old routine and grab their attention and hopefully start a new one,” she explains. “There are multiple ways to do this, but as a children’s behavior specialist, I’m going to tell you my favorite: whisper.”
She continues, “I know, it sounds crazy. But if your child is used to you yelling and yelling the demands and all of a sudden, the next time a demand is needed, you get to their level, look in their eyes, and you whisper your expectation? It will grab their attention. It can create a new routine.”
We have to admit, it does sound a little crazy—but so crazy, it just might work.
Day ends her video, “It can be super powerful. Try it.”