You won’t find a person who despises summer more than Wic Whitney
If you find hot weather miserable and can’t fathom why people get so excited to be outdoors in the hot, hot summer sun, meet your new BFF, Wic Whitney. Whitney’s TikTok videos are both impressive (he’s got quite the set of pipes) and hilarious, but there are a few on the summer weather that must be seen (over and over and over) to be truly appreciated.
His viral TikTok titled, “658 people die from heat every year,” is a compilation of everything Whitney despises about June through August, including but not limited to people, “sticky” kids, sweating, bugs, a lack of personal space, and the sun, which “becomes homicidal.” He spends a fair amount of time on the sweating, describing it perfectly as “a bath from your body where you get dirtier.”
@wicmakesmusic 658 people die from heat every year. #summerday #summerishere #finallypostingonhere
♬ original sound – Wic Whitney
He also spends time complaining about eating outdoors in another video because it’s the season when people demand to eat on patios. “I didn’t want to sit in the building where you’re specifically supposed to enjoy food,” he laments. “I wanted to sit outside that building and look at all the happy people inside while I fight off every bug that’s trying to get into the holes in my face.” He’s not wrong. Why wouldn’t you want to sit inside where the food and air conditioning is located instead of feeling like you’ve been sucked inside a dryer?
@wicmakesmusic As Good As I Once Was at riding, I Should’ve Been A Cowboy. I’d would’ve gotten a Red Solo Cup and filled it with Beer For My Horses. See, I was Made In America and live by the Courtesy Of The Red White And Blue………..wait Who’s That Man? Don’t Let The Old Man In!! You Shouldn’t Kiss Me Like That!!….eh fuck it I Love This Bar!! Happy Birthday America!
♬ original sound – Wic Whitney
Wic Whitney is described on his website as “an Arkansas-bred, Chicago-based creative,” who melds “southern soul and smooth rhythm into quick-witted and introspective storytelling that invites his fans to be present in every moment.” We don’t know about his singing, but his TikToks do just that.
Just take his one on hugging season, which we personally think should become an immediate placeholder in everyone’s calendars. “Hugging season,” which starts in October according to Whitney, will prevent everyone from hugging him during sweating season, which is the entirety of the summer. If you go in for a hug before October, he wants to warn you that it will feel “like a seal smothering a swan.” You’ve been warned.
@wicmakesmusic I am wet. Please help me. #summerishere #donthug #sweat
♬ original sound – Wic Whitney
Truly, Whitney’s attitude is something we can get behind when it comes to the summer heat. And hey, if you enjoy being outside when it’s 105 degrees, have at it—more room in a nicely cooled restaurant for the rest of us.
