An expecting father asked Twitter for advice about childbirth, and the result was a thread that’s absolutely packed with moms’ wisdom
When an expecting dad is getting ready for the arrival of his baby (especially if it’s his first one), he likely has a whole lot of questions. One expecting dad decided to crowdsource one of his biggest questions, taking to Twitter to ask for advice on what dads can do to make childbirth easier on their partners. The resulting thread is full of moms who absolutely delivered.
“A big question for anyone who has given birth: What is one thing that your partner did, said or brought to the hospital that really helped you through your birth experience?” Dave Whiteside, a soon-to-be dad from Ontario, Canada, wrote on Twitter. “Expecting dad hoping to support his wife in the best ways possible here ready to take notes.”
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A big question for anyone who has given birth:— Dave Whiteside (@dave__whiteside) January 17, 2023
What is one thing that your partner did, said or brought to the hospital that really helped you through your birth experience? Expecting dad hoping to support his wife in the best ways possible here ready to take notes. 🗒️
It didn’t take long for moms to start filling the thread with their best advice. And, as anyone who has given birth will recognize, these nuggets of wisdom are exactly what Whiteside needs to know going into his first baby’s birth.
There’s this great advice about showering a new mom with attention and praise, both during the birth and after it.
Focus your attention on her after the birth. Tell her how amazing she is for doing it & ask how she is feeling. Not just in the minutes after, but for days & months after too. All attention, incl the mom’s, diverts to the babies once they are born. Moms are left to recover solo.
— Tatiana Prowell, MD (@tmprowell) January 18, 2023
And this advice about keeping family up-to-date, while also creating a record of everyone’s love and support.
He managed socials! Then later I could read the play-by-play and the tons of encouraging comments from friends and family who were literally staying up half the night watching the feed like a soap opera while I had no idea. It was awesome.
— Karen Brooks Harper (@kbrooksharper) January 18, 2023
The advice kept pouring in, letting Whiteside know everything from what to bring to the hospital to how to work with hospital staff to make sure his wife got the best possible care—including being her advocate with the doctors and nurses, something that came up several times.
Advocate for her! Birth can be scary and there is a lot going through someone’s mind. Remind her to eat and drink after delivery. Don’t feel stupid asking questions of the healthcare providers – you will be thankful for it. Practice using the car seat, research car seat safety
— Ashley LEH-GAH-SICK (@ashleylegassic) January 18, 2023
Nothing will go to plan. You have to be ready to help figure out what needs to be done *now*, when she might not be able to, and medical folks may not listen. To calmly press for clear explanations.
— Clara Jeffery (@ClaraJeffery) January 18, 2023
He believed me (that something was wrong) when the nurses and doctors didn’t.
— Lauren Gambill, MD MPA (she/her) (@renkate) January 18, 2023
But one of the best moments came when the Twitter thread was shared on Instagram, where even more people weighed in—including Kelly Ripa.
“Do you mind if i eat?” And “I’m going to the batting cages since you’re gonna be here a while,” she wrote. Clearly, Mark Consuelos could have used this thread.
Later, Whiteside followed up to thank all the moms of Twitter for their advice, and explain a little more why he and his wife chose to crowdsource their childbirth recommendations.
Thank you – I have, and often! But we have never been in this situation before and she has never given birth, so we're taking shots in the dark at what would work best for her. We don't know what we don't know. So why not stand on the shoulders of giants?— Dave Whiteside (@dave__whiteside) January 17, 2023
“We have never been in this situation before and she has never given birth, so we’re taking shots in the dark at what would work best for her,” he wrote. “We don’t know what we don’t know. So why not stand on the shoulders of giants?”
And good thing he did, because now this advice is out there for everyone to use.