Need a good laugh to get through the spooky season? These Halloween jokes will do the trick.
You’ve got your doorway tricked out with decorations, Halloween-themed books on the shelf, and Halloween candy in order. Now it’s time for some good old-fashioned fun that isn’t too frightening. Halloween doesn’t have to be all about the scare: it’s a great time to yuk it up with silly jokes for kids. We’ve rounded up a list of sweet and funny Halloween jokes for kids that are sure to bring on jack-o’-lantern grins. Get ready to start laughing (and groaning) and feel free to head over to this post for some printable Halloween jokes. In the mood for some more giggles? Check out some special toddler jokes and extra squeaky-clean ones.
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1. Why didn't the skeleton go to school?
His heart wasn't in it.
2. What monster plays tricks on Halloween?
3. What kind of music do mummies love?
4. How do ghosts wash their hair?
5. What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school?
6. What is a monster’s favorite dessert?
7. What fruit do scarecrows love the most?
8. What does a witch use to do her hair?
9. What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
He is mist.
10. What room does a ghost not need?
A living room.
11. How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?
A pumpkin patch.
Related: 14 Halloween Minute to Win It Games for Kids
12. When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?
If you are a mouse.
13. What do you call two witches living together?
14. What happens when a vampire goes in the snow?
15. What's big, scary and has three wheels?
A monster riding a tricycle!
16. Why don’t vampires have more friends?
Because they are a pain in the neck.
17. What position does a ghost play in hockey?
18. What do you call a witch who goes to the beach?
19. What do you give a vampire when he’s sick?
20. What kinds of pants do ghosts wear?
21. Why did the zombie skip school?
He felt rotten.
Related: 27 Not-Too-Spooky Songs for Your Halloween Playlist
22. What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A blood orange.
—Rianna G., age 10
23. What did the little boy say when she had to choose between a tricycle and candy?
Trike or Treat!
24. What instrument does a skeleton play?
25. Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
Related: 20 Halloween Party Ideas That Are a Scary Good Time
26. Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
Because he had no "body" to dance with.
27. What candy do you eat on the playground?
28. What kind of dog does Dracula have?
A blood hound.
29. What is a ghost's nose full of?
30. What do birds say on Halloween?
Trick or Tweet!
31. Are black cats bad luck?
Only if you're a mouse.
32. Have you heard how popular the local cemetery is?
People are just dying to get in.
33. Why do skeletons stay so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
34.Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because there was noBody on the other side.
35. Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have the guts.
36. Why was the broom late?
It over swept.
38. What time is it when the clock strikes 13?
Time to get a new clock.
39. Where do vampires keep their money?
The blood bank.
40. What is a zombie's favorite thing to eat?
41. What kind of tests do vampires give their students?
42. Why does Frankenstein's Monster always finish his dinner first?
Because he bolts it down.
43. What does a pumpkin like to read?
44. What happens when you stay up all night on Halloween?
Something dawns on you.
45. Why was there thunder and lightning inside the laboratory?
Because Dr. Frankenstein and Igor were brain"storming."
46. How does a vampire start a letter?
Tomb it may concern...
47. Why are ghosts bad liars?
Because you can see right through them.
48. What's a ghost's favorite fruit?
—Elijah, age 11
49. What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
50. How can you tell a vampire has a cold?
She starts coffin.