As far as I can remember, I always wanted children. When I was little, I was quickly obsessed with The Babysitters Club and couldn’t wait to find clients of my own. When I was 12, I got my first babysitting gig watching a six-year-old and a two-year-old.

Looking back, how the hell did that parent trust me to watch her kids? I will never know. But hey, I was all about working five extremely stressful hours for $20. After all, that would supply my ice cream-truck habit for several weeks!

When I got to high school, I took child development classes and volunteered at my high school’s on-site nursery. It was definitely odd to care for six-month-old during my fifth period class, but my passion and love for children started young.

At the age of 25, I married and quickly began to obsess about having a baby. Right before I turned 31, I had my first child. The love I felt was indescribable. It was instantaneous and overwhelming. But postpartum was not kind to me, riddling me with absurd amounts of anxiety and a reel in mind of every possible thing that could ever go wrong to harm the baby.

Breastfeeding came naturally to the ravenous sucking baby—but for me? I counted down in fear, every three hours. It took a solid six months before I didn’t wince when she initially latched.

Fast forward a few years, now a mom to two children and my level of care is somewhat non-existent. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want my son to eat dog food, but I can only stop him so many times before I blindly turn an eye, just because it gives me five minutes of uninterrupted time. Oh and my nipples? Yea, I could nurse a tiger. They no longer have ANY feeling!

Being a mother was everything I expected, nothing what I expected—and so much more. As a child development specialist, I spent years counseling and advising parents on best practices for their children, but when it came to myself, somehow, I felt wildly unequipped at times.

When you’re in my field, the amount of pressure to get it right, every time, is high. Eyes are on me always. Listening to every response. Or, so it feels. Most days I feel like I’ve got this. But sometimes I don’t. Some days, I want to lock myself in my room or walk out the front door and drive very far away. Alone!

You know the days, the days when your children are non-stop fighting and every time you turn around there is something new. Like, watching your son dump a Costco size tortilla chip bag upside down. Or when your daughter decides she must have the very book your son is standing on, rips it out from under his feet, causing him to smack his head on the corner of the table.

Or like when your son has a diaper rash and you decide to leave the diaper off for 15 minutes or so, you know, to let things air out…then you notice a weird brown smear stain on your white cabinet that you don’t remember seeing before, to then spot a giant poop trail for the next three feet.

Or when you finally sit down to eat dinner, the kids quickly climb up on the dinner table, knock over a glass of water and the other kid slips and falls.

Sound familiar? These days happen. To everyone. They are hard and they make us loss our sh*t in that moment. Only for us to spend the next several hours beating ourselves up over how we reacted and how we vow to never blow up again.

The truth of the matter is, we will blow up again. We are only human.

But I will take the worst parenting day over never having had experienced the joy of my toddler walking up, unprompted, while cooking dinner and gives my leg the biggest bear hug. Or hear my four-year-old tell me, “I love you so much, it hurts.” Or watching how much fun they have when I decide to let loose and play freeze dance in the living room, while jumping on and off the couch with them.

These are the moments that recharge my mom tank. I live for them and my kids live for them. So, this is a reminder to all the moms who are having a sh*t day, I feel you! I have them, too. We all do.

But you are doing a damn good job, so go jump on the couch and make your kids laugh, because their laughter will fuel you.

Hello! My name is Brittany and I am the creator of Mama Bear Britt! I am a child development specialist, former preschool director and mama of two littles. I am working hard to create a place for parents to gather, learn and share. Join my tribe! 

Exposing your kids to different experiences, cultures and art has always been a top priority. Feel the same? Then think outside the box for your next adventure. Burning Man—the annual gathering in Nevada’s Black Rock Desert happening August 27-September 4—is a great opportunity to expose your kids to nature, creativity, culture and self-expression.

Long-time Burner Mom Harley K. Dubois and Cory Mervis (Lady Merv) graciously gave us their advice and insights on life on the playa with kids. We’ve updated our list of 10 insider tips to make your Burning Man 2017 a fun-filled success with your Burner babes. And, if you need more visuals to what life is like on the Playa with kids, check out these beautiful photos of families enjoying Burning Man together.

1. The Family Experience
Bringing along the kids will lend an entirely different experience. This is the reality, but it doesn’t mean that you won’t have an amazing time! When deciding what mode of transportation to bring consider that the distances in the desert are great and can be too much for little legs to walk or pedal on their own. Get crafty and decorate your bike trailer but don’t forget to rig up plenty of shade for them to ride in style. When considering your outings, early mornings and late afternoons are best to beat the heat and the larger crowds. Nighttime noise can be an issue for light sleepers, so consider camping further back. The airport can also be a great base camp for kids. It’s quiet at night and can be a source of endless daytime entertainment for aviation loving kids.

photo: Siberfi via Flickr

2.  Repeat After Me: No Lost Children
Lights, sound, big art, so much to see! Adventurous ones may have a tendency to wander off so be sure to affix a wristband (the kind they can’t pull off) with your name, kids name, camp name, and location. Check out My Precious Kid for a good selection of inexpensive ID bracelets. Cell phone service is unreliable at best so if you do become separated, be sure to contact a Black Rock City Ranger immediately. Misplaced children are taken very seriously and once a child is reported misplaced all enforcement staff are put on alert until the child is located. For the older kids, identify an easy meeting spot in case you get separated. Choose somewhere central and well know so others can help your child locate it as well. Playa Info (6 o’clock and Center Camp) can be a great place to meet since they are trained to help in situations like these.

photo “Mini Man” in Kidsvile courtesy of Mickey Sattler (his daughter is in the heart-shaped tie-dyed shirt!) 

3.  So Much More Than Halloween
Just because it’s not Halloween doesn’t mean that you can’t dress up. Have a little fun and get them into the moop-free costume spirit, people will love it! Just remember that kids in costumes (whether you’re in the desert or not) are always a hit so people will want to photograph your sweetheart and give them treats – be prepared! Official media photographers can be identified by their laminates and if you are uncomfortable with anyone taking a picture of your child, be vocal.

A special thanks to Coyote and his fam for this photo (and the one at top)

4. Dust Storm Diligence
Ski or swim masks are the best and cheapest dust protection for the eyes. Consider “goggle training,” meaning get the kiddos used to the goggles by wearing them a few minutes each day. Bandannas make good air filters but the best place to be during a storm is inside. Carry the What, Where, When with you and if you find yourself stranded away from your camp during an extended one, find a kid-friendly activity (marked with the kids symbol) with a shade structure to hang out in until it passes.

photo of “Story time” courtesy of Mickey Sattler

5. Skip the Kiddie Pools
Kid pools are a mess! If you are prepared to drain and wash the pools daily you will be all set, but the first dust storm makes the mini pools brown and unappealing.  If you must, bring the kiddie pools out as treat and be mentally prepared to have it as a one time special moment.

6. Pack Familiar Toys and Bedding
Whether it’s a stuffed animal, special blanket, or sippy cup, be sure to pack a familiar object from home to make your kid more comfortable out in this unfamiliar territory. It gets cold in the high desert at night so you may want to pick up a cozy sleeping bag and let them get used to it in the weeks leading up to the event.

 

photo: Siberfi via Flickr

7. Combat the Dry Desert Sun and Heat
It’s the desert and with that comes plenty of sun, dust, sand, dry heat, and cracking skin galore. Little ones can be especially prone to playa foot so try and keep thin socks on their feet and be sure to clean off every night with Vinegar wash, which neutralizes the alkaline dust and restores Ph balance. (Bring a spray bottle for easy access and portability.) Pharmaceutical almond oil and Olive oil are great natural moisturizers. If your baby has super sensitive skin pack some Bag Balm for diaper rash – it’s the stuff bicycle riders use for long trips. Also a must are wide brimmed hats, sunglasses with a strap, plenty of bandanas (dust mask and cool rag), leggings, vented hat, and tons of sunscreen. Pint sized sun umbrellas can also be a fun way for little ones to keep cool and in the shade.

Other tips: Pack clear fragrance-free moisturizer and some q-tips. If your kid gets a nose bleed or the dreaded “playa-taters” (nose buggers), blow their noses in a moist fragrance-free towelette and then run the moisturizer inside the nostril before sleep.

8. Hydrate, Hydrate, Hydrate
This may be a no-brainer but be sure to keep you and your kids hydrated. Water is always good but the high altitude can also wreck havoc on the electrolyte balance of tiny systems. Consider mixing up the hydration routine with low sugar sports drinks or unflavored Pedialyte. The occasional salty snack or the favorite Burning Man staple, bacon (for the meat-eaters) can also help with salt loss. The first sign of dehydration is actually crankiness, so be aware and catch it early. Squirt guns and small hydration packs can be fun for older kids.

photo courtesy of The_WB via Creative Commons

9. Get Connected With Others
Black Rocks Kids (Kidsville), Burning Moms, Alternative Energy Zone, and the official Kids Survival Guide – there are lots of support groups and community resources out there to educate and support families on the playa. Kidsville also has it’s own early burn which lets the little ones have their own fun if you opt to skip the main event. Consider going with another like minded family. You will have in-camp entertainment for your kids as well as options for trading off night time duty so you can still get out and have some adult fun.

10. Enjoy the Moment
Your kiddos are going to get dirty, dusty, cranky, and everything in between – there’s no way around that so give up your “perfect picture” and try to enjoy the family experience. Harley comments, “I was much more stressed about my child being out there than she was. She did great! I had bags under my eyes. Just relax and enjoy the moment. You are creating an experience for your child that will validate their imagination, inspire creativity, and give them confidence.”

Jade and Cake at Burning Man, photo courtesy of playapixie

Here’s some more advice for Burner parents with older/school-aged kids from Burning Man veteran Dawn:

– Instill basic safety/well-being skills religiously. Our three biggest rules: never leave camp or us without checking in with parents first, never leave camp without your camelback with water, goggles, & dust mask, and never ever enter any enclosed space without an adult we know & trust. Obviously also teach them your camp address, landmarks to get home, and what Rangers look like.

– Have a secret code for checking out their level of comfort with strange situations. We used green/yellow/red (where green is “no problem at all,” yellow is “I’m uncomfortable or uncertain, but willing to see how it pans out; keep checking in,” and red is “get me out of here”). For example, ask your kiddo “what do you think of that yellow art car?” “What yellow art car? I only see a green one.” Having a code means you can check in on them in a group without having to potentially embarrass them, but following up with them after the fact is always a good idea too.

We want to hear from you Burner parents! What are your experiences bringing your kids out on the Playa and are there any insider tips that we’ve missed?

—Erin Lem and Drea Lester

Want to maintain that coveted baby soft skin? Pick the right lotions and potions to keep your little one’s sensitive skin clean, moisturized and free of eczema. Three companies have just launched amazing new collections that can help. Read on to get the scoop on Baby Dove, Mustela Bebe and Promise Organic Baby, and to choose which one is best for you and your baby.

For Parents Who Love Tried and Tested Brands: Baby Dove

Dove has been around for 60 years, but this is the first line ever created just for babies. The just-launched collection includes five “Rich Moisture” products and three “Sensitive Moisture” products, so you can choose the best option for your baby’s skin type. You’ll love that the products are budget-friendly, simple and easy to find in big box stores that you’re probably already grabbing diapers and other baby necessities at anyway.

In the Rich Moisture line, you’ll find a soap bar, baby wash, shampoo, lotion and hand and face wipes, which all have a light, baby-friendly fragrance. The baby wash and bar both boast 1/4 moisturizing cream to keep your baby’s skin hydrated.

The Sensitive Moisture products – a baby wash, lotion and hand and face wipes – are all fragrance free to accommodate babies who have skin that’s more easily irritated.

Available at dove.com, $2.47-$7.99.

For Babies With Tricky Skin Types: Mustela Bebe

Mustela already had a beloved skincare line in their collection – the products, which are mostly natural, have a fresh baby scent many parents rave about. But the French company, which has been caring for mom and baby skin since 1950, just revamped their offerings for babies.

Now, there are four different lines to choose from depending on your baby’s skin type: Normal, Dry, Very Sensitive and Eczema-Prone. Each one includes a suite of products for tackling bath time, quick cleansing on the go, moisturizing and more. All four formulas include Avocado Pereose, which helps to protect and hydrate skin.

The dry skin line also includes Ceramides infused with Cold Cream that deepen the products’ moisturizing power. Try the Nourishing Cleansing Gel with Cold Cream for a soap-free bath that won’t dry out babies skin, and the Hydra Stick, which is an amazing on-the-go solution to protect Baby’s cheeks from cold air and wind.

For very sensitive skin babies, the fragrance-free Mustela line also includes a berry extra that soothes discomfort of easily irritated skin. Try the Soothing Moisturizing Face Cream, which can be especially helpful when teething rashes occur or the Soothing Cleansing Wipes, which can keep baby clean on-the-go without irritation.

For eczema-prone babes, Mustela’s award-winning Stelatopia line reduces flare ups and itchiness with the help of Sunflower Oil. Try applying Stelatopia Emollient Cream right after Baby’s bath to lock in moisture and soothe skin.

Available at mustelausa.com, $3.49-$26.

For Eco-Minded Moms & Dads: Promise Organic Baby

Prefer a chemical-free concoction for your baby’s skin? Promise Organic Baby’s brand new baby care line is free of parabens, synthetic fragrances, artificial colors, phthalates, harsh preservatives and sulfates. But what is inside is a healthy helping of certified organic ingredients. They all contain USA-sourced oatmeal to soothe and nourish as well as a special hydrating blend of organic coconut oil and Fair Trade Certified Organic Shea Butter.

Conquer bath time with Coconut Butter 2-in-1 Baby Wash with Oatmeal followed by lathering Baby’s skin in Replenishing Coconut Butter Baby Lotion with Oatmeal. They both have a naturally-derived baby powdery-like fragrance created from bergamot, lavender, vanilla and chamomile. Knock out diaper rashes with the non-nano zinc oxide-based Gentle Coconut Butter Diaper Rash Cream with Oatmeal. And keep sensitive skin safe from the sun with the SPF 30 Sunscreen Baby Lotion, which includes non-nano zinc oxide along with a host of moisturizing oils to keep skin hydrated as it’s protected.

Available at cvs.com May 2017, $7.99-$12.99.

What’s your favorite way to pamper your baby’s skin? Tell us.

–Julie Seguss

Meet they the dynamic, doctor-mom-duo—Dr. Diane Truong and Dr. JJ Levenstein, creators of MD Moms.  While they are board-certified pediatricians who not only created the first pediatrician-developed personal care line for our babies, they also give back to their community through their unwavering support of the Epilepsy Foundation.

Red Tricycle:  You’re part of a group of moms that are on a serious mission.  What’s yours?
DRs:  We trained together at the Children’s Hospital of LA, and witnessed firsthand just how many children were in need of products that effectively protected their delicate skin from harmful solar damage in southern California.  Our tiny patients, with crusty scalps, painful diaper rash, eczema and dry skin helped us develop several of our products.  It was so sad to see the children in pain, and we knew we could help!

RT:  Through your work, how did you decided to support the Epilepsy Foundation?
DRs:   During our time as pediatric doctors, we have cared for so many children and young adults who suffer from epilepsy – most of whom require 100% care.  We aligned with the Epilepsy Foundation of Greater Los Angeles in order to help their cause.  We help to fund more fellowships to train pediatric neurologists.  Epilepsy needs to be diagnosed early and treated with state of the art therapy to help improve lifelong prognosis – there are just not enough neurologists currently to meet that critical need!

RT:  What inspired you to pursue this passion for both the business and the foundation?
DRs:   We were moved by the need in the community for support.  Our commitment helps ill and disadvantage children through work in pro-bono clinics, as well as giving a portion of our proceeds to the foundation.  It’s thrilling to be able to provide our patients great products, but also be able to channel that directly towards the benefit of the community.

RT:  Did your kids play a role in helping you to come up with certain products?
DRs:  We both knew how frustrating it is to chase our kids around trying to apply sunscreen!  When our kids were growing up, they thought sunscreens were part of their daily routines–similar to brushing their teeth.  Once they figured out that not all their friends were subjected to the same rub down routine–they, of course, began to protest!    During those protests, the concept of self-applied sunscreens from towelettes was formed!  Moms win, and kids win too!  It makes applying sunscreen fun.

RT:  Chasing kids around to apply sunscreen is like watching a comedy of errors, right?
JJ:  My son was in the marching band, and all the kids after summer camp looked like raccoons since they weren’t apply sunscreen!  My son thought the self-applied wipes were super cool, so he handed them out.  Marching band saved!
DT:  Not anymore, thank goodness!  My son is a soccer player, and I always get a kick out of seeing his entire team line up to wait for a sunscreen towelette from me at the start of practice or game.

Be Like the Doctors!  Blue Shield of California’s Wellness Challenge:
Sunscreen and skin care is a lifelong lesson to staying healthy throughout our years.  But that’s not all the good doctors have to say.  As pediatricians, JJ and Diane give this advice:  Teach by example.  That means turning off the electronic devices when you’re together (bye bye for now, iPhone!) and spending time outside exploring the world around you.

Blue Shield of California is an independent member of the Blue Shield Association.