ML Interest Tag: hug

15 Simple Gifts to Make for Grandparents Day

by Abigail Matsumoto

Grandparents Day falls on Sept. 12 this year and it’s the perfect time to celebrate the people who put the grand in grandparent. From mail-order hugs to Grandparents Day coloring pages, we’ve found DIY gifts for grandparents that are thoughtful, creative, and come together in no time. Keep scrolling for all the awesome possibilities.

Grandkid Date of the Month Club

mliu92 via Flickr

When it comes to gift ideas for grandparents, you can't go wrong with quality time with the grandkids! Inner Child Fun came up with the brilliant idea for a Grandkid Date of the Month Club; just brainstorm a dozen fun activities and assign each one to an appropriate month. Voila! Learn more here.

"I Love You" Pillowcase

Mama. Papa. Bubba

Give the grandparents extra sweet dreams with this cute DIY pillowcase idea from Mama. Papa. Bubba. All you need is fabric markers, a couple of mini artists, and the pillowcase, of course. For the full (easy) how-to, click here.

Paint Your Life

Paint your life takes your most-loved photos and creates a work of art! Professional artists work to capture your favorite people in whatever format you choose—oil, charcoal, watercolor, and more.

Paint Your Life ($150.00+)—Find Out More Here

No-sew rice heating pad

Unsophisticook

Pamper grandparents with this homemade heating pad from Unsophisticook! It's stuffed with a pantry staple (rice!), can be made in 5 minutes, and uses upcycled baby legwarmers. Get the full instructions here.

Grandparents Day Coloring Pages

Skip to My Lou

Kid-made art is always a hit with grandparents, which is why you should click on over to Skip to My Lou. With three types of Grandparents Day coloring pages (each one cuter than the last), your little artists can go to town! Get the printables here.

Send a Hug

Paging Supermom

Send a life-sized hug to Grandma and Grandpa! All you need to do is trace your kiddo's outstretched arms to create a giant paper “hug” that you can roll up and mail. Paging Supermom shared all the fun details of this project with Raising Arizona Kids. Click here for the how-to!

Butterfly Footprint Art

Mommypotamus

Put a smile on Grandma and Grandpa's faces with a cute footprint keepsake! With acrylic paint and a canvas, and a little guidance from Mommypotamus, you’ll have a professional-looking, adorable gift in no time. To get the instructions, click here.

Interview with a Grandparent

Ivan Rocha via Flickr

Get your kids to interview their grandparents in order to learn more about the family tree: We’ve got 10 great questions right here. For extra memories, bust out your iPhone and hit record so you can keep the grandparent-grandkid interaction forever. Do Grandma and Grandpa live far away? We’d bet they’d love getting mail. Just send the interview questions, along with a kid-crafted card.

Colorful Coasters

Natural Beach Living

Let your little artists get creative with this simple project from Natural Beach Living. It’s super easy to pull off with supplies you probably already have, and the resulting coasters are functional and special! To get all the details on how they’re made, click here.

Flowery Card for Grandma

Mama. Papa. Bubba

This gift idea from Mama. Papa. Bubba. is sure to melt any grandparent’s heart. Each flower petal describes one of your mini-me’s favorite things about their grandma or grandpa. To get the details on how it’s made, click here.

Popsicle Picture Frame for Pop

Eighteen 25

Skip the store-bought picture frame and grab jumbo Popsicle sticks instead! Eighteen 25 has the 411 on assembling and decorating these fun frames. Just add a fave family photo for the perfect grandparent gift! Click here to get all the details.

Grandkid Refrigerator Magnets

I Can Teach My Child

How adorable are these refrigerator magnets from I Can Teach My Child? If you don't have enough kids to spell out “GRANDMA,” get creative and spell "LOVE" or “PAPA.” For more on this fun project, just click here.

Mini Photo Book

Walla Walla Valley Girl

Gather up a bunch of your favorite photos to make this easy DIY from Walla Walla Valley Girl. Once the photos are printed (you can do it on the cheap at your local drugstore), just punch holes and attach them to a metal ring. Click here for the full instructions.

10 Things We Love About Grandpa

Somewhat Simple

Here's a genius gift idea from Somewhat Simple: Ask your kids to name three or four things they love about their grandpa. Then type their honest, meaningful, and hilarious answers up word-for-word and attach a small gift that represents each answer. Click here to get the details.

DIY Photo Keychains

Somewhat Simple

Grandma and Grandpa can keep your little ones close all the time with this cute idea from My Crazy Life as a Farmer’s Wife. After you print out photos, have your little artists help decorate the keychains before gifting them. To see the instructions, click here.

Grandkid Photo Luminaries

Our Best Bites

Why frame it, when you can illuminate it? Turn your favorite family snapshots into these glowing photo luminaries from Our Best Bites. Bonus: These holders are upcycled from items like mason jars, flower vases, and hurricanes! Click here for the full tutorial.

— Abigail Matsumoto & Aimee Della Bitta

Feature photo: iStock 

 

RELATED STORIES:

12 Games to Play with Grandparents

Things to Do When Grandparents Visit

How Much Time Should Kids Spend with Grandparents?

Advertisement

Related reads

Advertisement

When My Toddler Makes Me Angry

By Evelyn Rountree

Photo: Evelyn Rountree of Love, mamãe

How is it possible to feel anger towards someone you (probably) love more than anything in the world?

When my kids make me angry, that feeling weighs on me more than any of the acts they did to actually get me to that point. So, how do you navigate this feeling when you are already so aware of your own emotions?

Understanding My Anger

I wish there was a moment in my life that would be the “cause” for me ever getting angry at my kids. But the truth is… there isn’t.

I get angry with my kids because I have a heart that beats and a brain that (luckily) functions. I have a body that gets exhausted from sleepless nights and endless chores. I get bored from the lack of adult interaction. There is a point when I just can’t bear changing another doll’s outfit. Or a baby diaper. Or making 7 meals a day.

And so, getting angry with my kids encompasses a daily ritual that sometimes is just Too. Freaking. Boring.

And let’s not confuse boring with “doing nothing.” You can do one thousand things per minute in your day and still feel drained. It doesn’t mean that it’s always boring. Not even that you’d like to be living differently. It simply means that right there, at the moment, you lack something.

What are you lacking in your own life that makes you angry at your kids from time to time?

For me, what I’m usually lacking is a combination of free time plus feeling guilty. Mom-guilt is my number #1 “issue” in my motherhood journey.

I have always been a “free-spirited” person. I would go out to eat at 11 p.m. at night if I wanted to, sometimes I would wake up early on a Saturday morning, pack a bag and start driving until I end up somewhere cool.

My husband and I had dates weekly, I was always surrounded by friends, life was loud and agitated.

The main thing I missed (and miss) is freedom. The freedom to just get up and leave. To grocery shop in peace. Heck, to use the bathroom in peace!

Once you become a mom, those things are gone for a while. And I’m still in the “while”.

And so, I’ve been slowly finding out what works for me.

1. I feel my anger. Give me a good 5 minutes to just be angry (away from the kids) and not try to simply “snap out of it”.

2. I validate my emotions. Taking a few seconds to really think “I am angry because this sucks” or “I am angry because I have just mopped and they threw crackers all over the floor again” and “I am angry because they didn’t sleep all night and now still refuse to nap” or “I am angry because I miss going out alone.” Those are very real reasons that a human being would get angry about.

3. I try not to trap myself into the “guilt” spiral. Things like, “There are moms with kids in the hospital and here I am angry at them for coloring on the walls” are not valid. True, it’s always good to acknowledge your blessings of having healthy, happy kids and a family to care for. But saying things like that invalidate your feelings and, therefore, you don’t work through them. You have a right to feel your emotions.

4. Do not act in anger. I don’t mean to sound cheesy, but this needs to be said. And that’s for everything, especially when it’s about your kids. I am sure you know this, but kids aren’t born malicious or manipulative. They are learning how to navigate through their own little feelings and it’s as hard for them as it is for you, if not more. It’s true, they do not understand WHY they can’t ask the same questions 300 times within a minute even after you’ve told them the answer.

So, for me, I take a beat. If I feel angry, I will step away and let myself feel angry. Cry if I have to. Scream if I need to. I will then come to them and explain, looking in their eyes, why I am angry. And crazy enough, they understand!

Just a few days ago, my almost 3-years-old girl and I had a bad day together. A combination of a bad night, no nap, and pouring rain lead to a difficult day to manage for us.

When my husband got home from work, he saw that we were just not in sync, so, he took her into her room, sat with her, and told her she could cry, scream, whatever she wanted. She was in there with him for a good 15 minutes just crying. And then…silence.

They both came out and she ran to me, and said: “I’m really sorry mommy, I’m ready to sleep now”.

While they were in the room and she was having a meltdown, I was out in the living room having a meltdown of my own. I cried and cried and just felt that anger. So by the time she was hugging me, I was squeezing her back saying “I’m sorry too, mommy is just super tired”.

You see…the both of us didn’t have a good day. It’s easy for me to forget that the tiny human yelling at me isn’t doing that to just make me angry and, while I’m having such a hard time myself, my almost 3-year-old little girl was getting pretty irritated with me too.

But in order for me to comprehend that, I had to first acknowledge, validate and allow my feelings to pour…so that I could let them go.

This post originally appeared on Love, mamãe.
feature image: Ryan Franco via Unsplash

I'm a stay-at-home mom to two toddlers, ages 3 and 1. Also a wife, a homemaker, business owner, and the heart behind the motherhood blog "Love, mamãe". My goal? To help mothers survive the toddler years with joy, grace, and sanity!

Advertisement

Related reads

Advertisement

The Cutest & Silliest Ways to Say Goodbye Before School

by Gabby Cullen

What we say when we kiss our kids goodbye can often fly under the radar when it comes to school mornings. But, even though the other stuff must come first (breakfast—check, lunch packed—check, shoes on feet—check!) those last-minute attributes are important, too. We asked parents all over the country for their daily traditions and collected our favorites! From creative silliness to classic kisses, scroll down to see them all.

iStock

The Classic Kiss

While some parents end up with an unusual tradition, the classic kiss and “I love you, have a good day” hold strong.

A Hiccup

Totally unique and evolved out of SPOKE contributor Corey W and her kiddo's Kindergarten transition, the "hiccup" consists of "a high five, a kiss, and then I'd pick her up and hug her. We called it a 'hiccup' goodbye because the first letters of the first two steps and the last two letters of the last step seemed to spell it out!"

iStock

A Reminder to Put on Their Listening Ears

From one mom who actually puts on her listening ears with her kid to other parents who gently remind their little ones to listen to their teachers, it's popular for mom and dad to instill the importance of paying attention. 

A Sweet Tradition

Red Tricycle's very own Ad Sales manager had a sweet school morning tradition with her own mom growing up, "every year before the first day of school, my mom would say the Shehecheyanu prayer (to celebrate something new) and always tell me to take the first step out of the house with my right foot."

A young boy wraps his arms around his smiling mother in affection
iStock

Hugs, Hugs and More Hugs!

Some parents twirl their kids around in a hug, some give a tight squeeze at their kid’s eye level, and one mom had us giggling with her unique version: “Before my kids walk out in the morning, we give each other what we call a T-Rex hug. I put my elbows really close to my sides, extend my forearms at a 90-degree angle and awkwardly pat the arms of my children, while they do the same to me. Not all that affectionate, but it makes us giggle every time.”

Blow Kisses

A twist on the traditional, some parents and kids send out an airborne version of a kiss. We especially love the way one creative mom does it “We blow each other a kiss and catch the kiss, and rub it on our cheeks so we can keep it with us all day.”

Keep It Simple

Teacher Jill Hornstein shares her favorite: "A fist bump. The kids that have a simple ritual are the ones that come in ready and excited to learn. Parents should NOT walk their kids into school every day. Start from the beginning allowing them to be independent."

iStock

A Secret Handshake

Writer Amber Guetebier says she and her son have developed a secret handshake, “We change them seasonally, and they are goofy. So after the love you's and hugs, we have a quick ‘handshake’ that says, I'll be here when you're done with this school thing."

A Good Start

Another way to start the day with affirmations is how SPOKE contributor Iliana Rosario-Urban does it, "Every morning during the school year I wake up before the boys and I write a positive note on the bathroom mirror so while they are brushing their teeth they can start their day with positive affirmations."

Affirmation Questions

The drop-off line is a great place to throw in last-minute positive reinforcement. From “Are you going to make someone smile?” and “Are you going to be confident?” to “Are you going to make good choices?” there’s no end to the ways you can remind kids of what they need to be doing each day. 

Love Signs

Signing the words “I Love You,” is a sweet and easy tradition to start. One mom, who has a difficult drop-off kid says “Peace Out!” while throwing up the peace sign out the car window. 

Coline Haslé via Unsplash

From the Heart

Mom Jesseca charmed us with her sweet goodbye tradition: “I draw a small heart on my hand, and one on my daughter’s. We 'charge' them by holding hands to drop off. Then if she needs extra love or encouragement during the day, she can press the heart for a boost.”

Rock Star Mornings

Mom Sara Schultz Borgstede doesn't draw hearts, she draws stars instead. "I draw a little star on their wrist because they are my rock stars!"

Power Jams

Yup, power jams are still, well, powerful. From one mom’s slightly shocking version, “I take musical requests on the way to school which usually means that I pull up to the Catholic school drop off with something very inappropriate like Gangsta's Paradise, Hypnotize (the clean version, of course) or California Love blasting from my minivan” to the most motivating songs around (Thunder, Born this Way, What About Us, etc.), kids love heading to the classroom with a killer beat and positive lyrics on the mind.

iStock

Other Favorites

Readers and parents shared so many sweet goodbyes that we had to include a few more.

“Be kind, I love you.”

“You are an amazing kid! Go have an amazing day! “

“Eat, sleep, and play well! Learn something new!

“Te amo mi vida! Or I love you mi vida!”

"Every morning at drop-off, I race my son up the stairs at school. It's a "me and him" thing that leaves us both cracking up and energized for the day. He beats me every time." - SPOKE contributor Elizabeth Silva.

"My son goes to a Montessori school. Most of the rooms have different class pets. Every morning my husband and the kiddo stop into a different room to visit them before getting settled into his own class. The bluefish room is currently his favorite." - SPOKE contributor Elysa.

— Gabby Cullen with Amber Guetebier, Andy Huber, Maria Chambers, Ayren Jackson-Cannady, Beth Shea, Kate Loweth

 

RELATED STORIES:

15 Thoughts Every Parent Secretly Has about Back to School

15 Ways to Earn Money Once the Kids Go Back to School

Back-to-School Tips from Teachers Every Parent Should Read

Advertisement

Related reads

Advertisement

Surviving the Unimaginable

By Melissa Christopher

When I sat down to write our story, I didn’t know quite where to begin. The feelings and emotions are still very raw. 

In July of 2016, my husband and I were blessed with a beautiful, healthy, and incredible baby boy. As our son grew, we knew this was a life that we had been blessed to have. We couldn’t imagine our life without our son. When our son turned two years old, we wanted nothing more than to add to our family and give our son the sibling he deserved to have.

This journey to another baby was not like our first. After two years of trying on our own, we decided to seek the advice and the help of a fertility doctor. We fell in love with our fertility doctor from the moment we met with her, and we knew we would be in good hands. We decided to start with a less invasive approach and tried Intrauterine insemination (IUI). Well, after two failed IUI attempts, we were left with that same feeling of being discouraged that we knew all too well. What was next for us?

Well, COVID-19 hit, and that was when our fertility journey was put on hold for a little bit. It wasn’t until the summertime that we decided to go through In vitro fertilization (IVF) after speaking with our fertility doctor. I was scared and upset that we needed to get to this point to conceive a baby. This reaffirmed to me more than ever that our son was a miracle. With all of that, I put on my big girl pants and didn’t look back. My poor husband was injecting me with shots every night while my son stood by and held my hand. He didn’t know what was happening but wanted to be supportive and with his mommy. It was in November that I had my first embryo retrieval. When I was leaving the surgical center, the doctor was hopeful and told me that she was able to get seven follicles. I was elated! Seven follicles meant that there could be seven embryos. Which would mean we had seven chances at having a baby.

That evening, the nurse called to let me know that only 1 of those follicles had made it. I couldn’t help but cry. All of those nights of injections for one follicle just made me start to lose hope. The nurse informed me that the doctor would be in touch in a few weeks to ensure that this embryo had passed all genetic testing.

I was so anxious waiting for that phone call. Then one afternoon in November, that call finally came. Our fertility doctor called to let me know that we had one embryo, and it passed all the genetic testing. She asked me if I wanted to know the gender of the embryo, and of course, I couldn’t wait. It was a girl! I immediately hung up and called my husband to tell him the news. We were set for our embryo transfer on December 23rd. This was the Christmas miracle I had dreamed about. I went for early morning monitoring on January 1, 2021, and it was that morning, I found out that I was pregnant. My husband and I were beyond excited and couldn’t believe that we would be parents to our beautiful son and now a baby girl. We talked about all of the fun experiences we would have as parents to both a boy and a girl. We felt like our dream was coming true…until it wasn’t.

At the next appointment, my husband had to wait in the waiting room due to the COVID-19 protocols. I asked if they could use the doppler to hear the heartbeat. She obliged, but when she struggled to hear the heartbeat, she ushered me into the ultrasound room. Naively I thought, at least I will get to go home with some pictures of our baby girl to share with our family and friends. At this point, I was 15 weeks and four days. As I looked up on the screen during the ultrasound, I realized something wasn’t right. The ultrasound technician told me she was going to get the doctor. 

In that instant, I texted my husband that something was wrong. The doctor came in to tell me that they couldn’t find the heartbeat. I insisted they needed to do an internal exam to get a better view. How could that be? The doctor assured me that it wasn’t necessary and that the baby was measuring two weeks smaller than predicted. At that moment, I, too, felt lifeless. The doctor brought my husband back to me, where we both just sobbed. We had worked so hard to get to this point and now our dreams of our little family of four were shattered. Our two-hour drive home felt like 10 hours. I just cried as my husband held my hand and assured me that everything would be alright. We drove right to my parents’ house to pick up our son, who immediately knew something wasn’t right. We explained to him that there wasn’t a baby in mommy’s belly anymore. He immediately hugged me and told me, “It’s alright, mommy, the baby is in heaven now. She will be our angel to protect us!” What a smart little boy. 

Somehow the wise words of a 5-year-old and his bear-hugging hug were all I needed to help comfort me through our loss. I don’t know what is next for our family, if we try again or if we continue to be blessed with our beautiful family of three. This loss has made me even more grateful for my husband, my son, and our family and friends who have been there for us. I am now part of 1 in every 4 women who suffer from a miscarriage. We are strong. We are brave. We survived the unimaginable.

RELATED STORIES:
How to Support a Mama Grieving Her Miscarriage
Miscarriage: A Story of Hope

Melissa Christopher
Tinybeans Voices Contributor

My name is Melissa. I am a mom to an incredible 5 year old boy. My husband, my son, and I live in the same town that I grew up in. In those 5 years of being a mom, I have learned a lot about myself and can't wait to share it with you. 

Advertisement

Related reads

Advertisement

How You Can Help Your Child Handle Disappointment

By Jamie Edelbrock

I get excited when I see social media posts in the United States about people gathering, friends hugging and going to the grocery store without wearing masks. My social media feeds are finally filling up with concerts, parties, and vacations. July 4th looked considerably different in 2021 versus 2020. 2020 was rough and consisted of lockdowns, endless bad news about COVID-19, limited celebrations, and few get-togethers. Thankfully 2021 featured an abundance of BBQs, parades, get-togethers, and exploding fireworks that matched the excitement in everyone’s hearts as they finally get back to normal.

While this is a reality for many of the world, it is not for many expatriates overseas. Where I live specifically, the COVID-19 numbers have been higher than they’ve ever been the past five days, and new restrictions, including a lockdown, have been mandated. It feels like a repeat of 2020 but with far worse statistics.

I had to explain to my daughters that for the next few weeks, and likely the remainder of their summer, they would be inside. No more pool, no more water parks, no more malls, no more restaurants—there were all closed. On top of that, we don’t know what school will look like in the fall, but we know it won’t be back to normal.

Oof. Talk about a heavy heart and major disappointment. While most of the world is taking steps forward, we are moving backward here in southeast Asia.

Life is full of disappointments, and those disappointments come in all shapes and sizes. It could be something as simple as not getting what they expected for their birthday or not being in the same class as one of their best friends. Or, in this case, likely not returning to in-person school and embarking on yet another year of virtual school. Learning how to navigate simple disappointments at a young age will help children build resiliency tools to handle the bigger disappointments in life.

So how do we teach children to handle disappointment well? Start with these simple tips.

1. Listen & Empathize

When you listen to understand, you are letting your child that you care. And it’s ok, to be honest with how you’re feeling too! This will let your child know that they are not alone in how they are feeling.

2. Guide Expectations

It’s tempting to sugarcoat the situation to minimize the sadness. However, that could lead to more disappointment. Instead, be your child’s mentor. Tell them what to expect next and then help guide them through whatever the situation may be.

3. Learn Self Calming Skills

When a child gets disappointed, they often get sad or angry. Learning breathing exercises and grounding techniques are great ways to center, calm down, and refocus. These are helpful for adults as well!

4. Remind Them of What They Can Control

Kids tend to feel out of control when they are disappointed, so it’s good to remind them that they won’t feel this way forever and that there are some things they can control. Attitude and mindsets are great places to start. Some other examples include:

  • They can’t see their friends in person, but they can still be social by connecting over facetime or zoom.
  • They can’t meet with their piano teacher, but they can still practice the piano.
  • Their favorite flavor of ice cream is out, but they can choose another flavor.

5. Practice Gratitude

There are many benefits to showing gratitude. Studies show that expressing gratitude positively affects your health, mindset, and relationships. Working with your child to make a list of things you’re both thankful for is an excellent way to practice gratitude.

Remember, big or small, experiencing disappointment at times in life is inevitable. So, the next time playdates are canceled, they don’t make the team, or their recipe didn’t turn out as they expected, remind your child of everything they’ve already overcome and help them through the disappointment they’re facing right now. Doing so will strengthen their mental and emotional health and prepare them for whatever life throws their way—it may even help you, too!

This post originally appeared on www.jamieedelbrock.com.
RELATED STORIES:

Jamie is married to her high school sweetheart and has three beautiful daughters. Through years of experience working with children, and raising her own, she knows how difficult parenting can be. She is an advocate for children's mental health and is best known for her creativity, optimism, and kind heart.

Advertisement

Related reads

Advertisement

How to Support a Mama Grieving Her Miscarriage

By Christina Furnival

Authors’s Note: The following article is about miscarriage. Currently, many who suffer miscarriages suffer alone and those who do share their stories often aren’t met with the support they need. This is a PSA as a voice to help shift the societal norm of not talking about pregnancy loss as well as to offer tips for how others can support a grieving couple.  

 

Miscarriage is unfair, terrible and painful.

It is one of those things that parents-to-be fear may happen to them. One of those things that unfortunately does occur to 1 in 4 women. And one of those things that is not talked about much, leading those going through it to feel mightily alone.

Miscarriage so often occurs that it is a common practice to avoid telling friends and loved ones about our pregnancies until after the 12-week mark, where the risk decreases significantly. The idea is that if we lose a baby in the early stages of pregnancy and have not told anyone yet, then we don’t have to go through the awkward and painful hassle of telling everyone that we are no longer pregnant. It sounds very practical. But, practical does not equal painless or healthy.

My concern about the common approach to pregnancy and pregnancy loss is that it has the potential to be even more painful. Often this grieving mama is left to suffer alone, retreating within, by not sharing about the miscarriage. There is this sense that sharing the news is “TMI” for others, too heavy, too personal, too negative. Or, if she does decide to share about it with her closest confidants, she is stressed about navigating how to broach the subject, which involves also telling them she was pregnant in the first place.

What’s more is that the accumulation of a society’s silent miscarriages leads many couples to feel alone in their loss. One of the best ways to process and heal from grief is to relate to others, feel their support and love, learn what helped them and express feelings. But, how can a mama find this from friends and family if she thinks she does not know anyone else who has gone through the same thing? The reality is, this mama most likely knows several women who have suffered, she just doesn’t know that she does.

This mama walks around, surrounded by others who have felt a similar pain, alone. She feels isolated in a sea of sisters. If only everyone had been open during their experience, she would have waves of support and love.

Another repercussion of the societal silence is that we aren’t practiced in how to offer help or support for a grieving mama. Don’t get me wrong, we try to do our best on the fly. We give sympathetic looks, we say “let me know if there anything I can do”, but we don’t know what to do and we move on, afraid of the uncomfortable conversation that is so often avoided.

In speaking with mom friends who have been there for a friend or who have suffered a miscarriage themselves, I have compiled a list of ways to support a grieving mama:

  1. Ask her how she’s doing and let her know that it’s okay to mourn.
  2. Don’t avoid the topic in fear of bringing up something that might make her sad. She already is sad. Show her you care. That said, if she doesn’t feel like talking after you’ve asked, respect that.
  3. Give her a hug—like a real hug. Hug her tight. Let her cry if she needs to.
  4. Make her something yummy to eat. It could be dinner, it could be dessert, it doesn’t matter. This not only shows love but saves her from having to plan and make food for herself when she might not have the drive to.
  5. If she is already a mom, offer to watch her kids. Give her a chance to grieve without having to tend to other little people. It will give her the rare opportunity to be able to put her needs and feelings first.
  6. If you feel close enough with the other parent or if your partner is, check in with them too. They may not have gone through the physical miscarriage, but they are still affected, hurt, sad and grieving too.
  7. If you have been through a miscarriage and feel comfortable sharing about it, relate with this mama. Let her know you’ve been there. Tell her what was helpful to you.
  8. Offer to do any of the above suggestions and see what resonates with her. Say “I want to help,” and tell her specifically the ways in which you can (such as the items above). Maybe she’ll pick what sounds best to her.
  9. If you don’t live near, send a card. Emily McDowell has several great cards for offering support.
  10. Lastly, if you are a friend or family member who is pregnant, please be thoughtful in the way you speak of your own pregnancy with or in front of this mama during this sensitive time.

I hope this societal norm shifts. I hope to see more families share about their pregnancy joys at the time that feels right to them and not just when miscarriage risk decreases. I hope the feelings of shame, embarrassment, isolation and fear that surround sharing about pregnancy loss fades. I hope mamas will look for and find solace and comfort in others should they need to.

And I hope we can learn how to be that solace and comfort in return.

Christina Furnival
Tinybeans Voices Contributor

I am a mom to two young kids, a licensed psychotherapist, and a children's book author. My passion is to help and empower moms and children to understand themselves better, navigate challenge confidently, and live the life they want. Visit me at ChristinaFurnival.com

Advertisement

Related reads

Advertisement

The Worst & Best of Parenting

By Priya Doshi

Parenting is the hardest job. 

At times I feel like I am wasting my time arguing with my tween daughter just because I want her to perform better in her studies.

I feel sick of dealing with my son’s tantrums. 

Parenting is also the most stressful job, I forgot to add that.

I was told by well-meaning relatives that a mother has the right to feel frustrated at times. But little did I know (before my husband and I decided to have two kids) that parenting is mind-numbing, mundane and boring. It feels like you are living someone else’s life and not yours.

I mean, parents are humans too. Parents would like to live their lives too. Just because one has had kids doesn’t mean it is the end of the road for one’s personal wishes, desires, dreams and most importantly, their freedom.

Freedom does get curtailed quite a lot after becoming a parent. 

Well, especially for parents like us who have no help. 

Yes, my husband and I have to just rely on each other. It can very hard when you are desperately looking for a break from doing things for kids all the time.

One thing that has reduced the stress from this monotonous job was that I decided to put my kids into a routine from a very young age (3 months of age). A stroke of luck or intuition.  

I was led to believe, by another set of well-meaning relatives that as a parent, I am too strict. Yes, because I put my babies into a routine.

I was told that I am like a timetable! I have too many rules with the kids.

I know at times I do go overboard with my rules. Sometimes, one rule contradicts another and creates confusion.

But hey, I am trying my best here without much help. My hubby works full time so help is available from him only in the evenings and weekends. 

It is okay if I make mistakes at times. I know I am not a perfect parent.

But I know for sure that I am doing my best. 

Sometimes, my kitchen is messy. Sometimes my laundry basket is overflowing. At times, I even postpone cleaning as I am so tired or I have just haven’t had the chance.

But I know I am doing my best.

At times, I yell at my kids without a reason. But there are times, I follow all the parenting tips that I preach to the T.

But I know I am doing my best. 

At times, I cry on my husband’s shoulder because I am so bored and frustrated with being a mother even if the kids haven’t misbehaved the entire day.

But I know I am doing my best.

I know I love my children and it is okay for me to feel frustrated at times.

There are times when I feel like the most privileged person in the universe when people praise my kids for being so well mannered. 

Sometimes, I just feel privileged for doing things for them.

Sometimes, I feel privileged when I watch them playing together. At times, I feel so touched by their innocent questions. 

And sometimes I just melt when they hug and kiss me. 

These far and few good moments are what give me the strength to get through the tougher moments of parenting. 

But I know deep inside my heart that I cannot imagine my life without my kids. 

Parenting is a tough journey but worth it in the end. 

 

 

 

 

Priya is a Freelance Writer for hire. She has a Parenting Blog. She has also written an E-book Painless Parenting where she shares tips that can make the difficult journey of parenting easier.  She is a regular mum from London who loves spending time with her kids and eating chocolates.

Advertisement

Related reads

Advertisement

You Can Take a Selfie with Mickey Mouse Thanks to These New Snapchat Lenses

by Karly Wood

No one is more excited that theme parks are reopening than the Disney gang! In a fun new partnership, Snapchat is pairing up with the Disney PhotoPass Service to bring fans some amazing augmented reality experiences.

The next time you log into Snapchat, check out the new Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse Lenses! The mice will appear next to you, interact and even share a hug.

Snag the new lenses over on the Disney PhotoPass Snapchat profile, and enjoy at home until Jun. 3. After that, they’ll only be available in the Snapchat app while at Walt Disney World Resort.

 

Snapchat and Disney are also working on even more photo experiences surrounding the 50th anniversary of the the Walt Disney World Resort. Guest can use the My Disney Experience app to add their fave Disney PhotoPass image and add it to Cinderella’s Castle with augmented reality. When you look through your camera lens, you’ll be able to see tons of special moments shared by fellow parkgoers.

Check back on the Disney Parks B/log for more fun Snapchat news in the future!

––Karly Wood

Feature photo: Courtesy of Disney Parks Blog

 

RELATED STORIES

It’s Official: “Hocus Pocus 2” Is Coming to Disney+ Next Year

Disney+ to Premiere the First-Ever Muppets Halloween Movie This Fall

Eek! Walt Disney World Announces All-New BOO BASH for Halloween

Advertisement

Related reads

Advertisement

Turning My Worry into Wonder

By Kim Mcisaac

Worry could be my middle name.

I suffer from severe anxiety. 

I don’t know where normal worry begins or ends because the anxiety takes of over like an uncontrollable monster that steals every ounce of rational thought.

All parents worry and parents with special needs children, or medically complex children even more so. 

Our children are so vulnerable and that makes us vulnerable too. 

I worry about what will happen to my daughter if I die. If anyone will love her, understand her, and connect with her the way I do. 

I know she will be cared for and I know she will be loved but she needs so much more. 

I worry about her getting sick or hurt as she is unable to communicate this with us.  When she is sick I have to fight the panic that can consume me. 

I worry about someone mistreating her or worse—how will I know?  

The worry can eat away at you. 

I wonder why this happened to her and what she would be like if she wasn’t affected by this. 

Would she be as happy, as sweet and lovable? Would she bring light and joy to everyone the way she does now?  

I wonder why I was blessed with this beautiful soul to take care of, this sweet and sassy, smart and silly girl, who is full of innocence and love. 

I wonder what kind of person I would be without her. 

I wonder what she thinks, how she feels, what it’s like to be her—is she truly happy?

I wonder if she knows how much I love her, deep in my soul, a connection like no other. 

I wonder if she knows how proud I am for every single accomplishment, no matter how small because I know how much work it is for her and how hard she had to dig for them. That my heart could burst with every new word that I thought I would never hear, every hug or kiss that I didn’t think I would ever receive. 

I wonder if she knows I would take all her struggles, confusion, and pain as my own and carry them for her if I could. 

I wonder what she will surprise me with next because she never ceases to amaze me. The worry as a special needs mom, a mom in general, and for me as a person will never stop. I have learned however to find happiness and peace in the here and now. To find the humor in every situation and to appreciate the beauty this life has bought me. 

 

Kim McIsaac , is a blogger at autism adventures with Alyssa . She resides in Massachusetts with her husband and four children .  She advocates and passionate about spreading autism awareness and educating and inspiring others . She likes to write , spend time with her  family and loves the beach . 

Advertisement

Related reads

Advertisement

7 Ways to Bring More Joy to Your Child’s Life

By Kara Reynolds

Photo: Nathan Dumlao via Unsplash

Have you ever met someone who just radiates joy at even the simplest of things? Joy sometimes seems like a hard thing to explain. It’s a feeling that everyone experiences differently. Maybe you, as a parent, find joy in a clean house or when your kids are getting along. Maybe your kids find joy in going out for ice cream or playing with their best friends.

During this pandemic, everyone could use a little bit more joy, even your children. Schooling at home might be stressing them out, and not being able to see their friends and family could be bringing them down. However, there are so many other ways to cultivate joyfulness.

Here’s how to bring more joy to your child’s life.

1. Set an Example of Joy
Your child’s joy starts with you. If you aren’t setting an example of what joy looks or feels like, then your child can’t begin to cultivate joyfulness in their own life. Children look to their parents to teach them almost everything, including emotions, which means if you’re feeling stressed, your child is likely stressed as well.

If you’re having trouble finding joy in your life, take the time to get to the root of the problem. Is it your job? Is it a past insecurity? Is it a relationship in your life? Once you find the root cause, you can begin to change your life to find joy in situations.

2. Spend Time with Them
One of the simplest ways to bring more joy to your child’s life is by spending more time with them! Human connection is one of the most basic human needs and desires. Humans are meant to spend time with each other. Of course, jobs and other priorities—like getting groceries for your family—are important, but time with your child is just as important.

Make your child and family a priority in your life if they aren’t right now. You’ll notice an increase of joy and happiness in your children.

3. Head Outside
There’s nothing quite like the great outdoors. Stepping away from screens and getting a change of scenery is an easy way to cultivate joy in your child. Between the fresh air, sunshine, and open world of opportunity to run and play, your child will be sure to feel a sense of joy.

Nature offers beauty as well. You can show your child the sunset, a forest, and animals, and they’ll be delighted! Not to mention, they’ll be soaking in vitamin D and exercising, both of which also bring joy.

4. Redirect Their Negative Thoughts
Everyone has negative thoughts. It’s, unfortunately, part of the human brain and part of life. They can quickly lead to anxiety or stress, which can be dangerous for your child. When they have a negative thought, put a spin on it so it has a positive outcome.

For example, if your child is stressed about an upcoming exam, change those negative thoughts into something positive. If they study enough and learn the materials, their good grade will reflect their hard work.

5. Schedule Playtime into Their Day
Playtime is essential in a child’s development. It seems these days, children don’t play enough or are equating play with screen time. While some screen time can be playing, like a video game or learning activity, your child needs physical play, which will bring them so much joy.

Children can spend hours playing, even if all they have is a cardboard box. Initiate play with them, and spend a few moments in their world. You and your child will feel an overwhelming sense of joy and laughter as you play together.

6. Help Others
Have you ever helped someone and feel so happy afterward? The joy you feel when volunteering or helping a friend can be taught to your children as well. Set up a day to volunteer or help a grandparent with a task. When humans help others, a connection unlike any other is made, and you feel joyful when you see the smile on the face of the person you assisted.

Teaching your children to help others will bring more joy into their lives.

7. Offer Physical Affection
When was the last time you hugged your child or showed some sign of physical affection? As your children grow older, they probably won’t hug you as much as when they were young. Children need physical affection as it is one way that you show them you love them. Touch releases oxytocin, which is a feel-good chemical, leading to joy.

Whether you hug, snuggle or give them a kiss goodnight, these kinds of physical attention will bring them joy. They’ll also reduce stress and make your child feel safe and at home.

Kara Reynolds is the Editor-in-Chief and founder of Momish Magazine.  A mom of four and matriarch to her big blended family, Kara wants nothing more than to normalize differences in family structures.  She enjoys peeing alone, pancakes, and pinot noir - but not at the same time. 

Advertisement

Related reads

Advertisement