ML Interest Tag: unsolicited-advice

21 Things You’ll Think as a New Mom

by Suzanna Logan

Every new mom has been there. Once baby exits your body, your thoughts jump on a roller coaster of emotion, and suddenly you’re along for the ride. One minute, you’re gushing over your baby (“How did I ever live without this child!”), and the next minute you’re questioning your ability to care for this tiny human being and your sanity for taking on the task. As you ride through the ups and downs of the fourth trimester, here are some thoughts guaranteed to cross through your love-full and sleep-deprived mind.

photo: Suzanna Piowaty-Palmer

1. A tiny human being is solely dependent on me for life. Whoa.

2. Leggings are everything. And, coffee is life.

3. Should I check on my sleeping baby? Absolutely. (Repeat process again in five minutes.)

4. Thanks, person 46,308,723, for the unsolicited advice about how to raise my child…but, no thanks. Really, you can stop now.

photo: Christy Blevins Photography

5. During early attempts at swaddling: “I’m never going to nail this human straightjacket thing.” After a few tries: “I should put in an application to Chipotle because my swaddling skills are off the chain.” (Basically, babies equal burritos when swaddled.)

6. If you don’t love my kid’s name, you should have your own kid and name it.

7. I should have invested in diaper stock because my kid could single-handedly fill a landfill. Cloth diapers, here we come!

photo: Haylee Sherwood via Flickr

8. Will this baby ever. stop. crying. Will I? (Related: Normal hormone levels = #goals.)

9. My emotions are completely stable…psyche!

10. My body will never look the same. And that is a-okay. I just birthed a freaking human.

photo: Suzanna Piowaty-Palmer

11. I should sleep while the baby sleeps. But I should also stay awake and stare at him to make sure he’s breathing…and because he is the most precious and perfect human ever.

12. Speaking of sleeping, not sleeping is my superpower.

13. When I say I want to “Netflix ‘n’ chill,” I actually want to watch television. Six weeks is the minimum waiting period, right?

photo: Georgia Ruiz via Flickr

14. Showering once a week is my new self-care routine.

15. Thank you, random stranger, for calling my baby “boy” cute while she was wearing a pink heart onesie. Also, why are all strangers colorblind? 

16. If stretch marks are my battle scars, then spit-up is my war paint.

photo: Haylee Sherwood via Flickr

17. How can one baby have so. many. clothes?

18. Pacifiers are my best friend. 

19. That first baby smile makes every minute of this crazy mamahood thing worth it.

20. My baby is the cutest/best/smartest of all babies ever.

—Suzanna Palmer

 

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The 5 Most Important Things Every New Mom Should Know

By Joan Lowell

Women need to build each other up and share some love along this journey called motherhood. When a woman becomes a mom, she needs support even more than she did the day before. Today’s society lends itself to self-judging and self-loathing. Moms (and dads) need to be shown some love in the form of positive encouragement. If you find yourself in a support role to a young or new mom, here are some real things you can say or suggest to help.

You’re Doing a Great Job (Even If You Feel Like You Aren’t)

Yeah, they actually do make books you might call a manual for the job. In this case, experience really is the best teacher. Like anything worth the struggle, parenthood is work. Welcome to the learning curve!

It May Not Get Easier, But You’ll Get Better

Challenges will change, but parenthood will always have its moments. Every stage holds joy and pain. Once you get your feet wet, you’ll get the hang of things. You may never get it perfect, but as long as you keep trying, you’ll improve, or at least adjust.

Accept Help from Others

(I should probably listen to this one more myself!) You are only one woman, yes you! You don’t need to be SuperMom or WonderWoman; perfection is not required and highly unlikely to be achieved. Let others (your spouse or significant other, babysitter, nanny, in-laws, neighbors) help. If help is available or offered, take it! Don’t feel guilty – you can do the rest of the work.

When in Doubt, Call Someone

Good parents try to learn new stuff when needed. Great parents trust their instincts, listen to their guts when it comes to their kids. You can’t know it all, so when you’re not sure about something, don’t hesitate to call the pediatrician or other experts. Pediatricians are usually more knowledgeable than your mom, sister or best friend who has a kid.

Give Yourself a Break

You deserve it! Allow yourself some down time, or a small pity party, if that’s what you need. Don’t forget to nurture yourself, eat, drink and rest. Remember to take time with your partner to have a night or afternoon away from parenthood. Avoid burnout. Make every effort to set aside time each week for yourself to rejuvenate and recharge your battery.

You could also offer to cook a meal for her, wash a load of laundry, or do the dishes piled down the countertop. Moms, especially new moms, will love and appreciate the help. What you should not do is offer unwanted advice or tell all the horror stories of your experience as a mother. New moms might hesitate to let you babysit, but you could offer words of wisdom and support or just some simple encouragement. A kind word can uplift a new mom full of questions and doubt.

Featured Photo Courtesy: shutterstock via pixaby

Go Au Pair representative, cultural childcare advocate, Mom to six great kids, I earned my BS at RI College and MEd at Providence College. My hats: educator, tutor and writer of local blog for Go Au Pair families and Au Pairs. Baking, gardening, reading and relaxing on the porch are hobbies.

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20 Signs You’re a Marin Mom

by rtsarahlynch

To outsiders, it may seem that the only thing that separates Marin from the rest of the Bay Area is an oft-photographed bridge. But locals know that North of the Golden Gate is a world of its own—one where microfleece reigns and the kids are known to utter “Who’s Bart?” Read on to discover the 20 signs that you’re a Marin parent, and let us know in the comments if there are any you would add.


Photo by Thijs Knaap via Flickr

1. Your kids thinks “juice” is bright green and tastes like a salad.

2. Your “other ride” is a mountain bike with a Burley trailer attachment.

3. You become a neighborhood celebrity by handing out actual candy bars on Halloween.

4. Your entire family has gone out to dinner dressed in yoga pants and microfleece.

5. You assume that any grown-up at the park under the age of 30 has to be the babysitter.

6. Your kids beg to go food shopping every weekend, thinking it means kettle corn, folk music and a bouncy house.

7. Your child practices identifying numbers and letters while driving around town, shouting, “Q7” “M3” “A4” “XC90”


Photo by stevetulk via Flickr

8. When your child draws a rainbow, it’s over a tunnel with a car driving underneath.

9. The invitation to your child’s birthday party includes a trail map for directions and a request to end world hunger in lieu of a gift.

10. The Easter Bunny hides recycled eggs filled with gluten-free rice crackers.

11. One third of the moms in your playgroup are launching their own business—at least one is a life coach.

12. Your child learned to maneuver a singletrack before mastering a staircase.

13. You quickly learned never to say “make sure it’s okay with your Grandma” when sharing a snack with your child’s new friend at the park.


Photo by haroc via Flickr

14. Your kid’s friends, their parents, his teachers and now you are training for a triathlon.

15. Your Stinson Beach bag includes down jackets, hats and mittens in addition to boogie boards and sunscreen.

16. Once a week you encounter unsolicited advice from a complete stranger on such topics as vaccination schedules, babywearing, and what you should or should not feed your children.

17. The social order among parents at the playground appears to be based solely on BMI.

18. Instead of an ant farm, your child asks Santa for a worm-composting kit for Christmas.

19. You schedule your days around the traffic patterns on the 101, i.e. a Friday afternoon visit to the Discovery Museum means dinner in Sausalito before heading north.

20. Your kids learned multiplication early by listening to conversations about price per square foot.

 What did we miss? Share your “Only in Marin” mom-isms in the comments below. 

—Sarah Lynch

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