Why Being Pregnant the 2nd Time Is (Way) Harder Than You Think

“Isn’t it so much easier the second time?” This has been both a question and comment from friends who have been there with two or more pregnancies and those who have not. I guess before going into my second pregnancy, I would have said, “Of course, it’s easier the second time!” But, that is so far beyond the truth. For me. Here is why being pregnant the second time is WAY harder? Challenging? Different? Not sure the correct word to use yet…

First Time – Finding Out

When the two pink lines appear, or the happy face emoji pops up on the stick, you jump for joy! You did it! You have no idea what is in store for you next when the nausea creeps in…..

Second Time – Finding Out

You want that happy emoji to be there, but when you see its face you begin to flash back to all the morning sickness, doctor’s appointments, blood tests, heart burn…..

First Time – Energy Level

Once the morning sickness settles down, your preggo self is feeling pretty good! You start to show, and everyone is extra nice to you. Sometimes people even let you cut in line in public restrooms (this is the best!). You sign up for pre-natal yoga once to twice per week. You can schedule after-work walks with friends, join the local pool, and relax in the evening with your favorite show or read a few chapters of What to Expect or Belly Laughs. You love all the preggo books. You get plenty of rest and even when you feel tired, you can put your feet up in peace.

Second Time – Energy Level

Exhausted. All. The. Time. Yoga? No time. Late night walks – not gonna happen. Books? Maybe a page or so before passing out at 8:30pm. What happened? You have a toddler at home. After working all day with the exhaustion kicking in around 2:30 – 3pm, you pick up the toddler from daycare, and you are on to job number two. Playing, cooking dinner, and bedtime routine. I can put myself to bed in less than five minutes, but a toddler’s bedtime routine….more like 45 minutes to an hour some nights.

First Time – Registry

You make plans with a good friend or relative who has been there before. You’ve been researching where to register for weeks, and feel a little overwhelmed with all things baby. But the excitement rises above the rest, because everything is so cute and so necessary. A $22 chew toy giraffe named “Sofie” – yes, please I’ll take two!

Second Time – Registry

We practically have a storage unit now of all things baby, so do we really need to register? One more car seat and some diapers will do!

First Time – Setting Up the Nursery

Pinterest. You spend weeks, months, creating pin boards. PIN PIN PIN. You can’t stop. Everything is so cute, and all of these ideas are so great. And you must PIN them all!

Then you start to see your vision and begin to shop on Etsy, Pottery Barn, Craigslist and even Flea Markets. Whimsical. Vintage. Themed. Baby Country-Chic. It all works and you are going to create it for your kid!

Second Time – Setting Up the Nursery

What nursery? Do we give up the guest room? Can the kids share? Where did we put the Co-Sleeper bassinet?

First Time – Labor Preparation

You spend weeks researching and talking to others about their labor stories and imagine what’s best for you. You sign up for the hospital tour to see your room, you take a labor and delivery class series, you sign up for a new mom’s group, breastfeeding class. You want it all!

Second Time – Labor Preparation

YouTube video of the hospital tour. Where to park the car: CHECK. What the rooms look like: CHECK. You’re all set.

First Time – Belly Pics, Babymoons, and more!

You are so organized putting on tight black outfits and printing out a number of weeks sign to hold sideways by your belly as you capture each week to see yourself grow. You imagine putting together all of these pictures in a row inside the Shutterfly album you are creating for the baby to see. You even match up your belly bump pictures with the fruit or vegetable your weekly baby email says that your baby is the size of. Thirteen weeks. Kiwi. Twenty-eight weeks. Eggplant.

You and your hubby plan one last getaway before the baby is born. You enjoy some swimming, napping, and try all of the restaurants. Ahh, so relaxing.

Second Time – Belly Pics, Babymoons, and more!

Crap. I’m at 20 weeks, and I can’t remember the last time I took a picture of myself. I feel so much bigger this time? Do I really want to compare my current belly bump to my premiere belly bump?

Now that we’ve had the sticker shock of the cost of daycare for Baby #1, is it really a smart move to take another Babymoon?

Those fruit and vegetable emails are coming way faster this time then the first time, aren’t they?

The first time glow and discovery is so different from the “Oh yes, that’s the lovely nausea I remember!” Oh, It’s heart burn time! And I just need some sleep!

The end result is just as exciting as the first, it’s just the second journey is a little…I guess, blurry. Still working on the right word….

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Rebecca Thompson

Tinybeans Voices Contributor

Rebecca Thompson is a working mom of two girls who loves to squeeze in as many vacation days possible to travel. She prefers a window seat and loves drinking sweet tea in a hammock.