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6 Priorities I’m Committing to as a Father This Year

By Tyler Jacobson

Photo: Shutterstock

I have banned New Year resolutions in my home, at least for myself. I’m sure that sounds odd; After all, the new year is when you’re meant to make all these grand resolutions about changing our lives, but really, how many of us actually keep them?

Personally, I realized I rarely stick to my resolutions beyond the third week and it wasn’t because my goals weren’t worthwhile. So this year, I decided to change my approach to see if I could carry my goals further. Instead of resolutions, I opted to define what my priorities are in my daily life and long-term, especially as a parent.

This year, I want to connect more with my family, to be more present and involved in my kids’ lives and to be a better father and husband. After deep reflection, here’s how I plan to commit to my priorities this year.

Spend more time with my kids.

I’ve noticed that I have a tendency to get lost in work or the business of providing in general and have long stretches where I don’t spend much quality time with my kids aside from family dinner.

That changes this year as I plan to spend as much time with my kids as possible. This focused priority means taking them out on father-child dates, participating more in their hobbies and cutting down on how often I say “Just a minute, I have to wrap this project up.”

Have more conversations with my children.

I want to have those in-depth conversations and lively debates that will improve our communication and give me more insight into who they really are. I am hoping that whether we end up chatting about their favorite superheroes, the state of the country or their hobbies, we’ll come to appreciate each other’s different viewpoints and I can increase my family’s connection to each other.

Be smarter about my kids’ screen time.

I’ve graciously accepted that screens and gadgets are a part of my children’s lives. While I can’t get rid of them, nor would I want to completely, I can help my kids make smart choices when it comes to apps, games and TV shows.

I have decided to devote more time to researching age-appropriate educational yet fun apps and TV shows that my kids and I can enjoy together.

Take better care of myself.

Any parent will agree that it’s hard to carve time out for yourself when kids are always underfoot. But I can’t be a good partner and parent if I don’t take time out for myself once in a while. Going out with friends, exercising more or just waking up half an hour earlier to meditate and center myself will all help me be a better father.

Be more loving towards my wife.

Whenever we venture outside, my wife and I do our best to model polite, appreciative behavior by being courteous to others. However, if I want my kids to grow up happy and emotionally healthy, it’s equally important that they see me being loving, affectionate and caring towards their mom.

Build up my kids every day.

With social media use on the rise, my kids are under pressure to measure up to all kinds of standards. So I’ll use our time together to build them up. I’ll be their cheerleader and sidekick and I’ll continually affirm how wonderful they truly are.

My family means everything to me and this year and I’m hoping my parenting priorities will bring us even closer together.

Tyler Jacobson is a happy husband, father of three, writer and outreach specialist with experience with organizations that help troubled teens and parents. His areas of focus include: parenting, social media, addiction, mental illness, and issues facing teenagers today.

 
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If Your New Year’s Resolution Is to Lose Weight, Don’t Tell Your Kids

by Erica Loop

Another New Year, another New Year’s resolution to lose weight. It doesn’t matter what year it is, but losing weight is always one of the most popular New Year’s resolutions and if you’re a parent, sticking with it can be pretty tricky, especially around the kids.

Speaking of the kids, recent research says you shouldn’t talk about your weight loss plans in front of them. Chatting about healthy eating habits? Fair game. Dishing on your diet details? Not so much, experts caution.

Photo: i yunmai via Unsplash

If making lifestyle changes is on the agenda, then by all means talk about it. But talking about the keto diet you absolutely must go on to finally fit into those size 6 jeans? Researchers say that isn’t exactly healthy for kids to hear from their parents.

A 2013 study in JAMA Pediatrics found that parents who talked about their weight or their size had teens who were more likely to diet, binge eat or engage in unhealthy weight-control behaviors. But when parents discussed healthy eating habits with their teenage kiddos, adolescents were less likely to have “disordered eating behaviors.”

So what does this mean for you? When it comes to your New Year’s diet plans, tread lightly. Think about what you’re saying and how you’re saying it around your kids. In other words, skip the “cellulite Sally” comments, stop yourself from talking about how you’ll never look as thin as you did in high school.

Instead, focus on helping your child understand what healthy eating habits are and why they’re important for lifelong health instead of just a number on a scale.

—Erica Loop

 

RELATED STORIES:

Dads with Daughters More Likely to Share This Mental Health Issue, Study Finds

The Most Popular New Year’s Resolutions (& How to Keep Them in 2019)

Healthy Trader Joe’s Products to Kickstart Your New Year

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Why Family Dinner Conversations Are So Important & How We Make Them Matter

By Joann Suen & Sapna Satagopan

Have you ever read an article or a blog about the benefits of a sit-down dinner with your family. You quickly decide that from this point forward, you’re going to enforce that rule in your house too. Perfection: that’s what we’re after, right?

Well, we’re going to stop you right there…We’re two moms, just like you, living in a guilt-filled world of soccer games, math tutoring and yes, even sit-down family dinners. Oh you don’t have sit-down family dinners every night? Shame! Well, we say, shame on those who are shaming us! After all, the ideal version of what a family dinner should look like—a perfectly set table with smiling kids politely chatting away and parents happily doling out a homemade meal—well, isn’t actually all that ideal or practical these days.  

Raise your virtual hand if you’ve ever had that “family sit-down dinner” in the car on the way to dance practice or ordered a “freshly cooked” meal from the local restaurant? We certainly have and we’re proudly closing up those takeout containers as we’re tap, tap, tapping away on our laptops! Let’s face it … life’s busy and far from perfect. So, let’s all take a breather and agree that no one’s perfect, dinner time is whatever everyone makes their best effort to have. The bottom line? We just want to have a moment to connect with our kids—that’s what gathering over a meal is really for: the potential for really amazing conversations and a chance to connect. 

We know you’ve got the “How was your day?” question covered for opening up those mealtime chit chats, but have you tried asking your kids about the news? News topics are natural conversation starters. Whether it’s news about the latest space achievement or why athletes are kneeling during the national anthem, asking a question about something happening in the world right now—something real, relevant and interesting—sparks infinite amounts of lively conversations.

Each week, we at Xyza News produce a dinner table conversation question that’s linked to something happening in the news. So after you’ve asked your requisite “How was your day?” check in, try following it up with our weekly dinner table conversation question and watch the conversation sparks fly!

For our inaugural post on Red Tricycle, we’re starting with a simple but important question: What can you do to help the environment?

Here’s the scoop: Plastic straws have been in the news A LOT lately because of their negative impact on the environment. Many places around the world have banned these environmentally-pesky things and it looks like several companies are following suit.

Starbucks, for example, has decided to phase out plastic straws from all of its 28,000 stores by 2020. Any guess on how many straws that would eliminate per year? One billion! The solution? Starbucks plans to use unique lids that allow customers to drink cold drinks without hassle.

American Airlines and Hyatt Hotels have also promised to phase out straws in their operations, but the two companies are going about it a bit differently. Hyatt will offer straws only on demand beginning Sep. 1 and American Airlines will be using biodegradable straws instead of plastic ones. SeaWorld in San Diego, California, is also banning straws and plastic bags, and Bon Appétit will remove plastic straws from all of its restaurants by 2019! It just goes to show how one small act can produce a ripple effect of planet-friendly choices around the world.

Talk to your kids about what you can do to help the environment! What have they learned—and more importantly, what can they teach you?

Featured Photo Courtesy: skeeze via Pixabay
Joann Suen & Sapna Satagopan
Tinybeans Voices Contributor

We're two perfectly imperfect moms who have five very different kids between the two of us. We believe that topics in news are a fantastic way to spark conversations in families. That's why we started the Dinner Table Conversation series here at Xyza: News for Kids. Won't you join us in the conversation? 

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How to Get Your Kids to Clean the House

by Amber Guetebier

Apart from (or should we say in addition to) sticker charts, bribery and guilt, getting the kids in on the household duties doesn’t have to be all pleading. Here are five ways to make cleaning up way less of a chore. Scroll down to make it happen. 

photo: Donnie Ray Jones via flickr 

1. Play Cinderella

Just own it: be the wicked stepmother who enslaves the poor Cinders and condemn her to a life of drudgery (well, just like 20 minutes). Dress ’em up in “rags” (just chop up some outgrown clothes and don an apron) and demand the sink full of dishes be clean and the floor swept. Bonus: later you get to play the Fairy Godmother who makes wishes come true (especially ice cream wishes. Wait, isn’t this just bribery?) You can also try playing Snow White out: specifically the scene where she tidies up the home of the 7 Dwarves: very useful for making beds.

photo: Jaro Larnos via flickr

2. Supermarket Wars

This requires two teams so it works best if you have either an older sibling or another parent to shop with. Kids who are old enough to find a few things in the store on their own can form their own team if you feel they are safe on their own in the store. Divide your shopping list into two lists: for example Mom’s team has produce, pet food and paper towels and Dad’s has dairy, snacks and canned goods. Double check your lists to make sure you’ve got everything you actually need between the two. Now form teams, and head to the store. When you arrive, each team gets a shopping cart and their list and then…they are off. Meet at the checkout or if you’ve got two grown-ups, check out and bag the groceries to complete the game. You can get more elaborate by deducting points for forgotten items and adding bonus points for staying under budget.

photo: kangheungbo via pixabay

3. Restaurant Romp

Want some help chopping up veggies and washing up the pots and pans? Play restaurant or Top Chef with your little culinary cuties. Have them clock in for their shift, say hello to fellow co-workers (siblings and/or stuffed animals) and ask their boss for the to-do list for dining prep before tonight’s dinner service. Got a white board? Write the night’s menu and tasks on it. Now hang out in the kitchen chatting about things but keep reminding everyone that there’s only so many minutes left “before we open for dinner” to keep them on task (and keep it real!). 

photo: laterjay via pixabay 

4. Fake Out

You can have some sudsy dudsy fun without actually doing the dishes: just make a pretend set up like the one here. You’ll need non-breakable dishes, plastic cups, a tub of soapy water and a tub of “clean” water and, if you’ve got one, a dish drainer. Who knows? Maybe they’ll be begging you to do the dishes tonight after all. One things for sure: you’ll have at least a few minutes minus the “I’m boreds.”

Tip: Obviously, don’t fill a sink up with sharp objects when little ones are on the job. Choose dishes they can wash, dry and put away. You may not have it done the way you’d do it, but you’ll be inspiring them for future (teenage years?!?) of service.

photo: Tim Malabuyo via flickr 

5. Play Hero
It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s…SuperBedMaker! Okay, they might not go for that name but grab those capes and see what feats of heroism your little superhero is capable of when it comes to sheets and blankets, putting away toys or other feats of amazing cleanliness. The whole family can don capes and see what they can do in an hour or less. Able to clean the counters off in a single pass? Fold laundry with a single hand? Go team! 

What’s your way of “tricking” the kiddos into doing their part around the house? Share your tips in the comments below. 

—Amber Guetebier

RELATED STORIES 

Chores Your Kids Should Be Doing By Age 10

Awesome Chore Charts for Kids 

Why Letting Go of Chores Has Made Me a Happier Mom 

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10 Questions That Are Better than “How Was School?”

by Erin Feher

If “what did you do at school today” is met with a blank stare or a shrug, we suggest spicing up your post school banter with these 10 creative questions. From silly to philosophical, it will get their wheels turning and lips moving far better than the typical tired Q&A.


1. If you had to stay in one class all day, which one would it be?

2. Which of your teachers would you guess has a pet, and what pet do you think they have?

3. Can you teach me one thing that you learned today?

4. Who brings the best lunch to school? What is typically in it?

5. Who is your funniest teacher?

6. Who would be on your dream kickball team and why?

7. Did any of your friends tell you any crazy stories today?

8. If you were in charge of planning field trips, where would you go?

9. Did you talk to anyone today that you have never talked to before?

10. What made you laugh today?

Do you have other ideas for questions that will get them chatting? Share them in the comments below! 

Photo by Phillip Harvey

 

 

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Just For Laughs: Funny Stories From the Modern Day Mom

by Erin Lem
Partner Content

For our kids, normal is swiping the screen of a tablet dozens of times per day, a mom who carries her laptop around 24/7 like it’s the neglected younger sibling, and never having heard the hum and beep of a dial-up modem. Since technology in all forms has infiltrated our lives whether we like it or not, we’re bound to have some funny (literally laugh out loud) moments with our kids and their interaction with these nifty devices. Below are some funny stories from the modern day, plugged-in mom, which will make you laugh and even say, that’s happened to me too.

My two year old son Cameron totally knows how to navigate himself on our tablet, including skype.  One night, Cam decides to skype with his Uncle Lyndon.  While “chatting”, his Grandma appears in the background and starts to talk.  But he says, “No, no grandma…” and starts to swipe his fingers across her face—as if he could actually move her and “swipe” her off the screen!!
Yvonne, New York City

A month ago, my seven year old daughter decided to send me a message about her one true “need” in life and decided to use my smart phone to deliver it.  Well, little did I know there were a number of apps where one could doodle, cut and paste photos and send messages, but much to my surprise, I got the message loud and clear – it was a picture of my daughter with her new “friend” and a note that said, “I want a dog!”  (Editor’s note: See photo above for Shamini’s daughter’s creation).
Shamini, San Francisco

When my son was four he accidentally bid $200 on a set of Playmobil trash cans on ebay—and won!  We quickly figured out how to lock down the website so he couldn’t make purchases.
Cathie, Portland

We were on vacation, staying in a hotel. There was a newspaper sitting on the table that my husband had bought the day before. My two year old daughter picked it up and handed it to her dad saying “Here daddy, here’s your tablet.”
Alanna, Portland

I knew it was time for a password on my phone when my Kindergartener ran upstairs and interrupted me as I was putting her younger brother down for a nap to say, “Mom, you just got a text from Shannon, she is complaining about her job again. I think you need to call her. She used symbols and A LOT of exclamation marks.”
Kara, Seattle

My daughter is the subject of countless photos, but she must have gotten tired of being the subject because she quickly learned to play photographer using my phone.  Now, I find tons of pics in my photo stream, mostly all blurry, of little toes, stuffed animals, even some candids of myself!
Gabrielle, San Francisco

Last spring, my friend gave her four year old her tablet to use in the car during a long road trip. He figured it out rather quickly and spent the entire trip playing games. She said it was one of their best car trips ever! But, the next day my friend received an e-receipt from iTunes for $600. Apparently, every time a pop up ad appeared on the screen her son hit the “yes” button resulting in $600 worth of gaming apps!! Lesson learned: If you give your child your tablet to use, disable your credit card info.
Kristina, Seattle

Got a funny story to share about your kids and technology? Share it with us in the comment section below! We’d love to hear. 

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All Good Things Come to Tribeca

by sarah choi

The sign of a seasoned parent is how you take your coffee and to what length you’ll go to get a good cup. Luckily for you downtowners, the latest outpost of Blue Bottle Coffee has landed in Tribeca at All Good Things, an addictive gourmet food hall that just opened this week. Sleep-deprived parents, rejoice! Let’s face it, the foggy folks from San Francisco know how to brew and have created quite the following among parents switching their poison from whiskey to coffee.

If caffeine is not your thing, sate your sweet tooth at Blue Marble Ice Cream. The Brooklyn-based creamery scoops up artisanal organic ice cream in classic flavors like mint chocolate chip, vanilla, and strawberry lemonade sorbet. And the kiddos won’t mind indulging you in this stop, so long as they get a cone too.

What Is It? All Good Things is like Tribeca’s own miniature Chelsea Market. In addition to New York City’s most popular Blues, think Dickson’s Farmstand Meats, Cavaniola’s Gourmet from Sag Harbor, bread baked daily on the Upper East Side from Orwasher’s, and more. The kids will get a culinary education just walking through the hall and tasting the delicious samples. You’ll love the chic warehouse aesthetic and chatting up the friendly purveyors – especially if they are the first adults you’ve seen all day!

Insider Tips: Park the wheels outside. All Good Things is great for curious foodie feet big and small, but strollers will block the entrance and create major traffic inside. There’s no seating here, so take your goods outside to the perfect stoop for pint-size people in front of the large window.

The Kids Will Adore: The frozen hot chocolate at Nunu Chocolates, Swiss health bread at Orwasher’s, and Culture frozen yogurt at Blue Marble.

You’ll Love: the New Orleans iced coffee at Blue Bottle, fig ball and any cheese from Cavaniola’s, black pepper beef jerky at Dickson’s, and gorgeous buds from Polux Fleuriste.

Best Time To Go:  Avoid the early morning commuter crowd waiting for their Blue Bottle coffee right near the entrance.

All Good Things
102 Franklin Street
(Tribeca)
Online: allgoodthingsny.com

Where’s your favorite place to get caffeinated in the city (or Brooklyn)? Let us know in the comment section below!

— Sarah Choi

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San Diego Dad & Daughter on Ellen!!

by Jacqui Boland

Update: Did you catch Ellen on Friday?
Jorge & Alexa were on the show (did we call that or what?) singing and chatting with Ellen and it was adorable!

We love this youtube viral video of San Diego single dad Jorge Narvaez (“just a father of two working my way through college”) and adorable daughter Alexa in her snowman pajamas, as they cover ‘Home’ by Edward Sharpe and The Magnetic Zeros.

We hope Ellen picks it up and puts them on her show – so cute. Check out the video below:  xx

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Red Tricycle is Hiring a Portland Communnity Coordinator!

by Jacqui Boland

Do you love being involved  in neighborhood activities, school events and other kids festivities?

Do you enjoy spending time chatting  with your friends on Facebook and via email?

Do you like coordinating fun play dates with friends and other family activities?

Do you want to make a little extra money, yet still be able to stay at home with your kids?

Red Tricycle’s new Community Coordinator position just might be the perfect fit for you! We’re looking for a dynamic, outgoing ‘people’ person with excellent organizational skills to join our team and serve as our Brand Ambassador in the local Portland community.

Responsibilities will include:
• Weekly events research and outreach (email and phone)
• Coordinate/work  1 event per month (usually Fridays 10-1)
• Contribute weekly local news posts on our website and through social media
• Represent Red Tricycle through a variety of  communication channels
• Be the Red Tricycle eyes and ears for market

This job is approximately 10 hours per week, at least 5 of which must be during traditional  “business hours.” Compensation includes cash, incentive bonuses, as well as many freebies and perks. PS – You’ll also have  fun as with  part of a dynamic, fun mom-oriented start-up team.

Submit your cover letter, and resume/backgrounder to jobs@tinybeans.go-vip.net

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