Beaches are now starting to reopen much to the delight of those looking to put their feet in the sand. Some may be looking to relocate to a community close to the water. WalletHub just released a report on 2020’s Best Beach Towns to live in.
To determine the most livable beach side communities, WalletHub compared 191 cities across 63 key metrics. The data set ranges from housing costs to share of for-sale waterfront homes to quality of beach water. This study divides beach towns into two categories, those by the ocean and those by lakes.
Top 10 Ocean Beach Towns
Naples, FL
Lahaina, HI
Boca Raton, FL
Newport Beach, CA
Santa Monica, CA
Sarasota, FL
Kailua, HI
Carlsbad, CA
Encinitas, CA
Vero Beach, FL
Top 10 Lake Beach Towns
Traverse City, MI
Folsom, CA
Redmond, WA
Holland, MI
Cornelius, NC
Kirkland, WA
Mercer Island, WA
Rocky River, OH
Davidson, NC
Pewaukee, WI
Best vs. Worst
Ocean Beach Cities:
Port Lavaca, Texas, has the lowest median home price as a share of income, 1.75, which is 8.7 times lower than in Coronado, California, the city with the highest at 15.14.
Wailuku, Hawaii, has the lowest median annual property taxes, 0.15 percent, which is 19.9 times lower than in Shirley, New York, the city with the highest at 2.98 percent.
Miami Beach, Coral Gables & Key Biscayne, Florida, all share the fewest disaster declarations (since 1953), 15, which is 4.9 times fewer than in Santa Monica, Redondo Beach, Manhattan Beach, Hermosa Beach, Palos Verdes Estates and Malibu, California, the cities with the most at 74.
Long Beach, New York, has the fewest property crimes per 1,000 residents, 2.37, which is 44.5 times lower than in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, the city with the most at 105.47.
Lake Beach Cities:
Alpena, Michigan, has the lowest median home price as a share of income, 2.02, which is four times lower than in South Lake Tahoe, California, the city with the highest at 8.05.
Morgan City, Louisiana, has the lowest median annual property taxes, 0.26 percent, which is 14.7 times lower than in Zion, Illinois, the city with the highest at 3.83 percent.
Traverse City and Alpena, Michigan, have the fewest disaster declarations (since 1953), five each, which is 11.6 times fewer than in Lake Elsinore, California, which has the most at 58.
Bay Village, Ohio, has the fewest property crimes per 1,000 residents, 3.05, which is 34.6 times lower than in Branson, Missouri, the city with the most at 105.62.
Last week, I was talking to a man who asked me if I thought women could have it all. You know, the whole shebang. The real deal. The DREAM. A beautiful family, a great career, a house with a white picket fence, and a dog that doesn’t jump on every person that enters the house. A great social life, a physically fit body with flawless makeup and a humanitarian.
I came to the quick conclusion that no, women cannot have it all.
We can make it look that way on social media, but we all know that’s not true.
He seemed very surprised at this answer coming from me.
As someone that embraces my mistakes and admits that I am in no way the perfect parent or wife or employee or human, I feel that women just can’t have it all.
At least not all at the same time.
Yes, we can have extremely successful careers and win awards and be on the covers of business magazines.
Yes, we can have husbands and children and pets and they can love us and we can love them and all can be great in the world.
Yes, we can be mentally solid and go to therapy and church and have a wonderful, relationship with our spiritual self.
Yes, we can have social lives and a great group of friends we see weekly and chat with while drinking wine, swapping CrockPot meals we will never make, and complaining about our kids.
Yes, we can be physically fit and exercise each day and drink enough water and feed our body healthy, nutritious food.
Yes, we can volunteer at our kid’s school and chair fundraisers and get silent auction items for the good of those that need our help.
Yes, we can have long shining locks, flawless eyebrows, kickass makeup, and nails that are always perfectly manicured.
So yes, we can have it all.
But no, we cannot have it all at once.
Those people that have tried have ended up burnt out and on the couch crying in dirty yoga pants with a pint of ice cream and a spoon while watching Pilot Pete get involved in all the girl drama on the Bachelor.
Why do I say this?
Because that person is me. I tried so hard to have it all. I thought that I could raise my boys, be a great wife, have a clean home, be a productive employee, volunteer with the best of them, exercise five days a week, get enough sleep and maintain a flawless manicure.
But I was wrong. I couldn’t do it all. I ended up constantly worrying and extremely overscheduled. It took a toll on my mental health and I was a hot anxious mess.
So I had to step back and take a look at what was the most important to me at that time. And I decided that I needed to put myself and my family first. I continued to raise my kids the best I knew how and made sure I was going on date nights with my husband. I still worked out and took care of myself so I had the energy and health to do these things.
But I had to step back from some of my volunteer commitments. I hired someone to clean my house for me every two weeks. I had to miss some trips with friends and I have never been “Employee of the Month.”
But you know what, none of that matters to me anymore. Yes, I would love to do all those things and have all the things and be the best but it’s not possible or feasible. At least without an assistant, a chef, a trainer, and a clone of myself.
I started cutting myself some slack and started taking naps again on the weekend because I was tired. My body needed rest, so I let it rest. I let myself start watching my favorite TV shows again even though they might take up five hours a week of my life and I could only watch them in 20-minute increments.
Why? Because they made me happy. And if I was going to focus on me and my family, I needed to be happy. And relaxed. And caught up on the Bachelor and Project Runway. Don’t judge.
So no, as women we cannot have it all. You will always have to prioritize one thing over another. That’s just life. So don’t be so hard on yourself. It’s not worth the stress and the worry.
Seriously, I have been there and it was a disaster. Don’t punish yourself. Take time to do what makes you happy.
I am a full time working mom with two little boys, Henry and Simon. I write about real life and real life gets messy. Contributor for Motherly, HuffPost Parents, Scary Mommy, Today Parents, Love What Matters and Her View From Home.
Parents of young children who are entering nursery school for the first time are wondering what the best way to prepare their child for this transition is. As someone who has supported children, their parents, and the teachers of young children through this process for many years, I have several thoughts.
First of all, I will assume that parents, in going through the registration or enrollment process, have already become familiar with the school or child development center that their child will attend. If not, find out now about the philosophy and mission of the school and learn about the class size, center layout, and daily routine. Familiarizing yourself with information about the school will help to calm any anxiety that you might have about your child’s transition. Your attitude toward the school or center, your child will be attending is the most significant factor in how your child will cope with this new routine.
As parents and caregivers, we want to strike a balance between communicating necessary information to children so that they know what to expect and giving them too much information—which may contribute to increased anxiety about a situation.
For example, talking to your children about nursery school, what and where it is, that it is a place where they will meet other children and play with lots of toys, is a good start. Mentioning it every day with lots of hype, asking them if they are excited, if they want to go to nursery school, etc., is not. Of course, many children breeze through life’s transitions, and for them, it is hard to get such situations wrong. However, for others, they are more sensitive to change, and we cannot assume that they will be excited about an event for which they have no prior experience. Moreover, contrary to our instincts, bringing it up at every turn may actually heighten their anxiety about it. Of course, if the child brings it up, then, by all means, answer their questions and most importantly, send the message that you feel positive about this next chapter in their lives.
Parents often ask me to recommend a children’s book that might help introduce the idea to their child. Frankly, most books that I have come across all touch on the topic of how scared a child might be, to go to school. For some reason, introducing the notion that nursery school is a place that you might be afraid of going to, seems like a recipe for disaster for some children. It reminds me of when a toddler falls, and all the adults in the room gasp and leap at the child. It does not allow the toddler to form their own conclusion about the experience, and more often than not, the child will start to cry based on the startled and scared reaction of those around them. If, however, your child expresses fear or says that they don’t want to go to school, then maybe a book that addresses that might be helpful. If anything, I would preview books about starting nursery school and if you don’t think the text provides a good introduction, talk about the illustrations, asking your child to describe what they see like toys, paint supplies, dolls and dress-up, cars, and trucks. Let them ask questions about what they observe and start a conversation.
What also might be helpful is to tell your child that it’s okay to be afraid of something, that we all feel afraid of new things sometimes. Telling your child about an experience where you have been fearful of a new school, or a new job helps them to learn that fear is part of everyone’s experience. Sending the message that you believe that they can handle this emotion goes a long way in supporting them as well. Also, sending the message that you are confident that their feelings will change when they get to know their teachers and the other children helps to reduce anxiety.
Children of all ages love when parents personalize a story, so I would tell a child about my own memories of the first day of school. Also, I would occasionally point out the school when passing it and if possible, even visit before the first day, especially if there is access to a playground. If you have friends with older children, I might ask those children to tell your child about their nursery school experience. What was the name of their school? What was their teacher’s name? Who were their friends? What was the best part about it?
Experiences like these give your child information about what to expect but in a relaxed and easy-going way. They get the idea that lots of children go to nursery school and that it is a place where you meet other children and have fun.
I often recommend to families for the first week or two of school, that if possible, they have the child brought to school by the family member or caregiver that the child most easily separates. While parents are sad to miss that “first day of school” moment, it frequently minimizes the child’s separation anxiety and helps to ease their transition from home to school. Other tips include walking into the school or classroom holding their child’s hand if possible, instead of holding their child in their arms, as this can make for an easier separation. It also allows the teacher to make eye contact and connect with the child more easily. It again sends the message that you, as the parent, believe your child is ready for nursery school and that while the message may be subtle, you are reinforcing the idea of their independence. Which after all, is what nursery school is all about.
I am a parent and grandparent with over four decades of experience in early childhood education. I share my passion, wisdom and experience, with parents and the people who care for and about children at Little Folks Big Questions, where we're out to answer the questions parents face in today's world.
As the start of the school year approaches, parents of young children who are entering nursery school for the first time are wondering what the best way to prepare their child for this transition is. As someone who has supported children, their parents and the teachers of young children through this process for many years, I have several thoughts.
First of all, I will assume that parents, in going through the registration or enrollment process, have already become familiar with the school or child development center that their child will attend. If not, find out now about the philosophy and mission of the school and learn about the class size, center layout, and daily routine.
Familiarizing yourself with information about the school will help to calm any anxiety that you might have about your child’s transition. Your attitude toward the school or center, your child will be attending is the most significant factor in how your child will cope with this new routine.
As parents and caregivers, we want to strike a balance between communicating necessary information to children so that they know what to expect and giving them too much information – which may contribute to increased anxiety about a situation.
For example, talking to your children about nursery school, what and where it is, that it is a place where they will meet other children and play with lots of toys, is a good start. Mentioning it every day with lots of hype, asking them if they are excited, if they want to go to nursery school, etc., is not.
Of course, many children breeze through life’s transitions and for them, it is hard to get such situations wrong However, for others, they are more sensitive to change, and we cannot assume that they will be excited about an event for which they have no prior experience.
Moreover, that contrary to our instincts, bringing it up at every turn may actually heighten their anxiety about it. Of course, if the child brings it up, then by all means, answer their questions and most importantly, send the message that you feel positive about this next chapter in their lives.
Parents often ask me to recommend a children’s book that might help introduce the idea to their child. Frankly, most books that I have come across all touch on the topic of how scared a child might be, to go to school.
For some reason, introducing the notion that nursery school is a place that you might be afraid of going to, seems like a recipe for disaster for some children. It reminds me of when a toddler falls down, and all the adults in the room gasp and leap at the child. It does not give the toddler the opportunity to form their own conclusion about the experience, and more often than not, the child will start to cry based on the startled and scared reaction of those around them.
If, however, your child expresses fear or says that they don’t want to go to school, then maybe a book that addresses that might be helpful. If anything, I would preview books about starting nursery school and if you don’t think the text provides a good introduction, talk about the illustrations, asking your child to describe what they see…toys, paint supplies, dolls and dress-up, cars and trucks. Let them ask questions about what they observe and start a conversation.
What also might be helpful is to tell your child that it’s okay to be afraid of something, that we all feel afraid of new things sometimes. Telling your child about an experience where you have been fearful of a new school, or a new job helps them to learn that fear is part of everyone’s experience. Sending the message that you believe that they can handle this emotion goes a long way in supporting them as well. Also, sending the message that you are confident that their feelings will change when they get to know their teachers and the other children helps to reduce anxiety.
Children of all ages love when parents personalize a story, so I would tell a child about my own memories of the first day of school. Also, I would occasionally point out the school when passing it and if possible, even visit before the first day, especially if there is access to a playground. If you have friends with children who are older, I might ask those children to tell your child about their nursery school experience. What was the name of their school? What was their teacher’s name? Who were their friends? What was the best part about it?
Experiences like these give your child information about what to expect but in a relaxed and easy-going way. They get the idea that lots of children go to Nursery School and that it is a place where you meet other children and have fun.
I often recommend to families for the first week or two of school, that if possible, they have the child brought to school by the family member or caregiver that the child separates most easily from. While parents are sad to miss that “first day of school” moment, it frequently minimizes the child’s separation anxiety and helps to ease their transition from home to school.
Other tips include walking into the school or classroom holding their child’s hand if possible, instead of holding their child in their arms, as this can make for an easier separation. It also allows the teacher to more easily make eye contact and connect with the child. It again sends the message that you as the parent believe your child is ready for nursery school and that while the message may be subtle, you are reinforcing the idea of their independence. Which after all, is what nursery school is all about.
Best wishes on this next step for you and your child. Your child and your family are about to make many happy memories!
I am a parent and grandparent with over four decades of experience in early childhood education. I share my passion, wisdom and experience, with parents and the people who care for and about children at Little Folks Big Questions, where we're out to answer the questions parents face in today's world.
I have been a complete disaster for the last week. Finally, the tides have changed because I boldly took the leap to change my professional direction and chase my dreams. My philosophy is “go big or go home,” so when I created my own door of opportunity and it actually opened, my life flashed before me. No, I wasn’t dying—I was reflecting, projecting, inspired, overwhelmed, thankful, and so truly happy. I really relish that feeling because it doesn’t surface often in life. Then I tried to remember when I felt like I was riding on this rollercoaster last, and that’s when it dawned on me—landing your dream job feels exactly like landing a date with your dream guy.
Even though I’ve been out of the dating pool for a really long time, I must admit, once the butterflies, jitters, and excitement to the point of nausea takes over, it’s pretty hard to forget. You just know it when you feel it.
1. Taking the leap: So you got the guts to get on the playing field and put yourself out there. It’s so exciting and makes you feel so vulnerable, doesn’t it? What if you get a “no”? What if it’s a “yes”? Ok, what do I say first? What if I sound stupid? Should I just go for it or practice what I’m going to say with a friend first? Wait, what the heck am I doing? Who do I think I am? Ugh, just stop over-thinking and just go for it already! Stop questioning yourself and don’t let this opportunity slip away! Ok, I’m doing this. I can do this. What’s the worst thing that can happen, right?
2. Crazy phone checks: OMG, I did it. I think I’m going to be sick. Let me check my phone now. Did he call? Nope. Ok, need to check my e-mail. Nothing yet. Maybe it went to Spam mail. Twitter? Ok stop right now, no cyber-stalking, what’s wrong with you? Chill out! Maybe there’s something wrong with my phone. Yeah, maybe I should power down and reboot? Ok, no, I’ll wait a minute first. No maybe I’ll check e-mail again before I do that.
3. Butterflies galore: Oooh, so excited I could throw up. Constant jittery jumping beans, I feel like I could jump out of my skin with anticipation! The shakey tummy is nonstop. Holy crap, will something please just happen?! But wait, not yet, there’s so much to do! What do I do in the meantime to get my mind off of it?
4. Meeting greeting: What do I wear? What should I say? What if I sound like a rambling idiot? I need to prepare. What if it gets awkward? Do I have anything in my teeth? I hope we hit it off. Do I look ok? Oh geez, I’m a mess. My hands are sweaty and my knee won’t stop shaking. Chill out, woman! Do I have anything in my teeth?
5. Call back: Wow, that was awesome. Do you think it went well? You think I came across ok? I really hope it works out. Let me check my phone and see if I got a message. Do you think I’ll get asked back?
After having four kids, spending the last decade either being pregnant or taking care of a tiny tot, and mostly working as a writer and editor for a trade magazine, taking a leap of faith and changing directions can seem a bit exhilarating, daunting, refreshing, and just right. What’s even better is when that defining moment occurs at the right place and at the right time. Just like in a relationship, sometimesyoujust know. The best part is grasping the life-changing enormity of it all.
Even though these last few days have felt like I’m going to be sick with overwhelming excitement and happiness about my new direction, I hope this feeling stays so vibrant and fresh. After my fourth child began school, and it was just myself for the first time since I was in my 20’s, I made the conscious decision to figure out who I truly am and what I want—and then to relentlessly and passionately chase my dreams.
I made a firm decision that during this time, I would wholeheartedly carry out my vision, do it in digestible doses, learn from it, grow with it… and most importantly, love it every step of the way. I feel most blessed to have landed my dream guy and enjoy my full family. Thankfully, I can now also relish in landing my dream direction that I have always wanted.
Ifyou’re truly passionate about your vision, then work for it and live it. That’s how dreams become your reality.
The only way to reach the top of that professional mountain is with one small step at a time. Don’t look up and get overwhelmed— just focus on the simple path and each simple step that guides you there.
Ruthi Davis is a the Founder of Ruth Davis Consulting LLC with over two decades of success in advertising/marketing, media/publicity, business development, client relations, and organizational optimization for a variety of clients. Ruthi is a proud mom and influencer in the parenting and family market as founder of the Superfly Supermom brand.
Safety is likely at the top of every family’s list when it comes to desirable features in a neighborhood. WalletHub has just released its annual report on the safest cities in America so you can see how your own stacks up.
WalletHub compared more than 180 cities across 41 key indicators of safety in order to rank each city. Each indicator was organized into three categories: Home & Community Safety, Natural Disaster Risk and Financial Safety. The data included factors like unemployment rate and road quality.
Based on the 41 metrics weighted under these main categories, the top 10 safest cities in the United States for 2019 are:
While the number one safest city in America, Columbia, Maryland, remained the same since 2018. There is a new name among the top ten cities and a handful that climbed the list since last year. In 2018 Yonkers came in at seventh, but it has since landed in second place. Gilbert, Arizona also jumped to fourth, pushing cities like South Burlington and Virginia Beach a few rungs down.
The new addition to the top ten is Chandler, Arizona, which bumped Boise, Idaho out, which landed all the way down at 25th in 2019.
We all have that friend (maybe it’s you!) who has held on to their childhood plush or teddy bear throughout her life. It’s stuck around from infancy into teenage years and eventually ended up in her adult home, even if it’s tucked away. Whether it’s gifted from loving grandparents or from Mom or Dad, this beloved item become a symbol of comfort, a friend on adventures and a nostalgic reminder of childhood.
As a parent embarking on these years with your own children, you know the important bond between a child and their forever friend—and so does GUND. Backed by a 120-year-old legacy, GUND was the first ever company to produce a teddy bear in the early 1900s. The iconic brand known for creating premium plush for over a century receives thousands of messages each year from parents reaching out to reclaim lost plushies or to share the love their child has for their soft, cuddly friend. Who else could better understand the adoration and intense love between a child and their plush, which was shown in their recent commercial (cue the tears).
Now until Nov. 26, Red Tricycle readers can save 15% on orders from GUND by using the code REDTRI at checkout!
Classic characters like Snuffles, GUND’s signature teddy bear with a unique crescent design that lets him look into your eyes with every hug, continues to steal hearts and new additions like Rainbow Sparkles Unicorn and Baby Toothpick Sloth give endless lovable character options for every child. We’ve curated some real life mom hacks that illustrate the important role of your child’s first best friend and exactly why you #gottagettaGUND.
#1: THE BUDDY SYSTEM
Creator behind @VeronaBrit and PR Specialist at a children’s hospital, Veronika Javor has witnessed both personally and professionally how plush can calm and comfort a child, from her own home to the hallways of the hospital.
“Aside from their everyday appearances at the breakfast table, or being used as a pillow during story time, my children’s plush plays a significant role in their lives on the ‘bigger’ occasions. A cuddle before the first day of school, or after a scraped knee. If I know that tears may be coming—like when booster shots roll around—I’ll make sure to pack their favorite plush for them to hold onto. It helps them manage those moments when they need a little bit of extra courage and comfort.”
#2: AMPLE INVENTORY
Ali Budd, mom of two and the principal behind @AliBuddInteriors, a Toronto-based design studio, learned the hard way what happens when a favorite plush is lost. On a recent trip to England, her son’s beloved friend Gordon was misplaced somewhere between arriving at the airport and boarding the plane.
“Children become so attached to their plush that it literally becomes an extension of them. It’s a disaster if it falls apart or in our case, gets lost. The solve: buy multiples! When your child finds the plush they love, make sure to stock up. It’s also important that the item be high quality, so it lasts and can withstand some aggressive hugs.”
#3: HIGH STANDARDS
Once these plush make their appearance, they are here to stay, so it’s important to ensure they are top quality and, of course, cute! GUND’s high-quality materials, textiles and construction, paired with beautiful modern designs, provide longer lasting memories, while also being modern and trendy additions to nursery décor and beyond.
Having recently transformed a nursery into a big girl room for one of her clients, Ali (with her designer hat on) experienced how a beloved plush can be one of the only ‘little kid’ items that graduates to the big kid room. Growing up doesn’t mean there isn’t a place for their plush.
“GUND features modern designs, adorable characters in premium fabrics with incredible attention to detail, making them effortless to incorporate into a styled space. They should be where your child is, whether on their bed or a cozy reading nook.”
Now until Nov. 26, Red Tricycle readers can save 15% on orders from GUND by using the code REDTRI at checkout!
There are certain moments as a parent when it literally feels like the entire universe has it in for you. No matter how bad your worst mom days are, however, it could always be worse as one mom’s hilarious viral Facebook post about poop on a slide illustrates.
Mom, Brittany Nichole Berry, took to Facebook to share her epic mom fail and let’s just say after reading this you’ll never leave the house without a full stock of baby wipes ever again. Berry’s post begins with an ominous warning, “I’ve debated on sharing this, just because it’s so embarrassing and I failed as a mother on so many different levels. But….. I think it needs to be said, if only to serve as birth control for the younger generation. Fair warning…. TMI AND POOP!”
As Berry explains she and her daughters were on an impromptu visit to the park when disaster struck. “At one point Sadie goes down the slide and then walks in front of me and I see ‘wet’ shorts. I think, ‘okay she’s peed out of her diaper, no big deal,'”Berry writes. “Then I start to change her and I realize it’s a poop-trophe.”
Every parent has experienced a “poop-trophe” moment at some point, what really set this one apart is what happened after she discovered she only had four wipes. “I start cleaning her up and there’s only FOUR wipes. This isn’t a four wipe kind of poop it’s pressure washer or open fire hydrant kind of poop. So I start looking for more wipes in the van. At this point, Sadie’s just standing there naked in an empty (thank God) the parking lot, with poop up her back in her hair, down her legs to her knees, even on her shoes, because taking her clothes off did not go as smoothly as one would hope,” she writes.
And then things really kick into fourth gear. “I turn my back, frantically searching for more wipes. Nothing. I had just cleaned out the van yesterday. I got out any and all extraneous wipes, clothes, everything. I KNOW there’s no other wipes in there, but I search anyway. Then I hear it…. that painful SQQQUUUEEEAAAKKKKK of skin getting stuck to a plastic slide on the way down. I look up and yes, of course, it’s Sadie. She’s going down the slide, butt naked, COVERED in poop, leaving a long skid mark of poop allllllll the way down on her way.”
The only saving grace is that the park has remained empty this entire time. Berry decides the only thing she can do is wrap her daughter in a blanket, buckle her and head home, but she doesn’t feel good about leaving behind a poop-streaked slide so she rushes the five-minute drive home to grab some Clorox wipes. She returns and parks the car with the kids inside and AC running and is thankful that the park is still empty.
“I get the brilliant idea to go down the slide and wipe as I go. Instead of risking a head injury I decide to go down feet first, on my stomach, holding on to the side to slow myself down with one hand and wiping with the other. This was not easy. I did not look elegant or attractive, I’m sure. I’m 254lbs of sweaty fat flopping around this children’s slide like a fish out of water,” she writes. “When I get to the bottom, I’m finally satisfied with my cleaning job. I turn and see a car parked, a family, all of them with glaring at me…. I dunno how long they were there. I never heard them pull up. They never got out of the car. I genuinely think that we’re afraid of me, after all, I was an overweight seemingly childless adult, on children’s playground equipment.”
Finally she looks down only to discover that her shirt is covered in poop. “Of course, I went down feet first. My clothes got the bulk of the poop. ” She continues, “I am NOT getting that on my seat belt. I am not getting a ticket or dying from not wearing a seat belt, no matter how short the drive. So,….. I do the only thing I can think to do….. I drive home in my bra. That family is scarred for life I’m sure…”
And that is by far the funniest poop-trophe story of all time.
—Shahrzad Warkentin
Featured photo: Courtesy of Brittany Nichole Berry
Emergency preparation is my passion, and it’s how I spend a lot of my “free” time. Why? Because practicing for an emergency or disaster helps build the skills and muscle memory that’s necessary to best adapt to situations that are intense and potentially catastrophic. And it’s an ongoing practice: Despite decades of experience as a medical officer in the Air Force Reserve, you’ll still find me spending parts of my weekends teaching at CERT refresher trainings, observing disaster exercises hosted by local emergency planners and the Red Cross, or taking FEMA courses of interest.
It’s something that I knew would help me and my family feel empowered and confident as we move through our everyday lives. But what I didn’t anticipate was how early on my 4-year-old daughter would observe my passion for emergency preparation, and that she would start expressing interest and curiosity herself at such a young age.
I knew from my research that 1) children want to help and learn, and 2) interaction builds confidence, thus lowering anxiety in the event that an emergency occurs. Living in Los Angeles, I also knew that my daughter would be exposed to this topic in casual conversation, see it in the news, and maybe even hear about it from her friends.
Thus, EmBug’s disaster preparation journey began, and I used her natural curiosity as a jumping-off point. Here’s how I framed some of the conversations we had in a way that is appropriate for a child around her age:
The reason why I’m spending time learning about disaster planning:
When she wanted to know where I was going, what I was reading, and of course, that famous question of four-year-olds—why?!—we would talk about how I want to help people learn what to do in case of an emergency. I would explain that I was going to events where I could talk with other helpers.
For example, during an evacuation drill hosted by the city, I told her I was going to go talk to the firemen, police officers, and other emergency services teams. She asked if she could go, and she was so excited that morning, and so curious. During the event, she got a chance to turn off a demo gas valve from the local gas company and explore a fire truck with the fire chief. At another emergency fair, a local Topanga fireman taught her how to put out a fire with a fire extinguisher. Pretty cool stuff in the book of a four-year-old.
How I answer whether a disaster is going to happen soon:
At one point, my daughter specifically began to ask about earthquakes; first, she asked what an earthquake was, and I responded with a simple statement: “We live in a city where sometimes the earth shakes.”
Naturally, her next question was about when they happen, to which I answered truthfully: “No one knows.” Over the course of the next few weeks, we discussed what we would do when it happened and listened to clips of KPCC’s “The Big One” podcast, because she asked me what an earthquake sounds like.
Curiosity is contagious, and knowledge is power:
At school during an interactive supply check, she rolled herself up like a burrito with an emergency solar blanket and was so excited to laugh and show her friends.
When the Ridgecrest quake hit last month, we were in Portugal with several families from Los Angeles. Em overheard the adults discussing the earthquake, and because she already had an understanding that that could happen, she focused not on asking why, but instead on sharing what everyone needed to do. I’d never felt prouder of my little girl, whose curious spirit has allowed us to connect on this topic.
Despite misconceptions that conversations about emergency events are inherently scary, a big part of LadyBugOut’s mission is to help foster an environment for you and your family that is engaging and empowering. And it’s something that can be done at your home with ease.
If you’re unsure of where to begin, the bag itself is an excellent conversation starter: Leave your child’s LadyBugOut bag in a safe spot that’s in plain sight, and set aside time to explore all its contents. Each item opens up an opportunity to have a conversation and get a sense of what your child is curious about.
As both a medical officer in the Air Force Reserve and a biotech strategist, Linda has combined her military and civilian career experience to found LadyBugOut. Linda has deep expertise in disaster preparedness, and believes that communities become more resilient when individuals take responsibility for preparing their families.
It’s a reality that natural disasters are more common and destructive than ever, and have the potential to strike at any time. But did you know that children are one of the most vulnerable populations amidst a disaster, and also critical to a community’s recovery?
As a teacher of disaster planning and after the birth of my daughter, I was driven to ask the same questions many parents I know had as well. 1. How and when do you start to prepare a child for a natural disaster? And 2. How do you talk about it in an age appropriate manner where the conversation leaves your child feeling secure and empowered instead of more scared?
What I learned, was comforting. I found that with the more knowledge children have and practice they gain, the more prepared and resilient they can become. As parents we witness this every day. Our little ones evolve from taking tentative first steps to confidently running sprints. Like any new skill, it doesn’t happen overnight. Family preparedness needs to be practiced and developed over time.
Armed with this new knowledge, I consulted LadyBugOut advisor Dr. Susan Ko, Child Psychologist and former Co-Managing Director of the National Center for Child Trauma Stress. She shared some universal tips on how to approach the subject of disasters with children:
Stay calm, collected, and confident. Whatever you say, your children will remember the feeling in addition to the words. Reframe “fear” to “calm.”
Plan for a series of small conversations. Share knowledge clearly and often.
Follow your child’s lead. Encourage them to ask questions.
Answer questions directly. Keep it factual.
“I don’t know” is an opportunity to look it up together.
Since I live in a major earthquake zone (Los Angeles), I first practiced with my daughter and was inspired by the outcome. The conversation I had with her went like this, “Em! Did you know that we live in a place where the earth shakes sometimes?” I paused to give her the chance to lead the conversation. She replied, “oh-ok, but when?” My response was simple and truthful, “Honey no one knows exactly when, but if you figure it out we can retire!” The conversation ended there and she didn’t mention it again for weeks. Over time, she began asking follow-up questions about what she should do, what an earthquake might sound like and so on. To address these questions, we practiced “Drop, Cover, Hold” in various places, and even listened to a small segment of the NPR Podcast, The Big One. When the recent Ridgecrest earthquake occurred and she heard adults talking about it, she chimed in proud to share her knowledge on what to do to keep her friends safe.
My four-year old may not be the one to save our family during a quake, but through the conversations we’ve had and the practice drills we’ve done, she has built confidence and feels prepared. Through preparing for an earthquake, she is developing her resilience. What I always tell parents is to start with your own knowledge and expertise regarding their child and be authentic. You don’t need to know it all.
Regardless of the disaster type, it’s important that you:
Educate yourself about the risks, resources, needs to keep your family safe in the event of a natural disaster.
Focus a plan for reunification. Discuss where to meet to keep everyone safe.
Have emergency supplies including food, water, medical, and safety items.
Communicate this plan to your community – both locally in your neighborhood and to a dedicated out of town contact.
For each disaster type, here are the most important tips for families with small children below.
Earthquakes
Everyone needs to know how to “Drop, Cover and Hold on”
If an earthquake occurs at night discuss the importance of staying in bed with your children. Advise them to roll on to their stomachs and cover their head and neck and wait for you to come get them
If inside and you don’t have a large object to seek cover under, drop where you are, avoiding windows, lighting fixtures or furniture that could fall
If outside find an open space and stay there—move away from buildings, streetlights, or trees
Remember the #1 injury in an earthquake is cut feet, so tie shoes to your bed or keep sneakers underneath to protect your feet
Wildfires
If you see a wildfire, call 911. You may be the first person to have spotted it. Ensure your kids know this number as well
If emergency officials tell you to evacuate, evacuate!
Be aware that smoke and ash can travel for miles so to limit exposure. Stay indoors, avoid strenuous play and exercise, keep doors and windows shut and set air conditioners to recirculate air.
N95 masks help to keep harmful particles out of the air you breathe, but they should only be worn if they have a proper fit.
Turn on outside lights and leave all the lights on inside the house. This will help it be seen in heavy smoke.
Tornados
If you are in a building:
Go to a safe room such as a basement, cellar, or lowest building level, be sure to bring items of comfort for your children such as lovies or stuffed animals
If there is no basement, go to an inside room like a closet or hallway.
Stay away from corners, windows, doors, and outside walls and do not open windows.
If you are outside with no shelter nearby:
Get into a vehicle and buckle your seatbelt. Put your head down below the windows and cover your head with your hands and a blanket, coat, or other cushion.
If there is no car or shelter, try to find a ditch or area lower than the ground and lie down. You are safer in a low, flat location than under a bridge or highway overpass
Hurricanes
Stay away from windows and glass doors. They could break and hurt you.
Don’t go outside when the rain or winds stop. This is the eye of the storm, or a short “rest,” and it will start again.
If need be, stay inside a closet or a room without windows. You can also lie on the floor under a table or sturdy object.
We know that preparing for disasters is daunting. On top of everything else to do and worry about as a parent, sometimes, the last thing you want to do is prepare. As I have worked with hundreds of families just this past year, what I always tell parents is that preparedness is a state of mind, not a one-time task. Do one thing differently tomorrow. Over time, preparedness will be a part of your family culture and each supply, task, drill, and conversation can bring your family safer, together.
As both a medical officer in the Air Force Reserve and a biotech strategist, Linda has combined her military and civilian career experience to found LadyBugOut. Linda has deep expertise in disaster preparedness, and believes that communities become more resilient when individuals take responsibility for preparing their families.
