What is pride? It’s a feeling of being happy, content, and proud of who you are or what you’ve accomplished. Have you ever felt this before? Here at Xyza, we feel a sense of pride when we see governments and communities working together to accomplish something big, and when people treat each other with love, respect, and acceptance. That’s why we celebrate Pride Month with the LGBTQ community.
Countries around the world celebrate the LGBTQ community at different times of the year. In the United Kingdom, for example, Pride Month is celebrated in February, whereas in Brazil the largest Pride parade in the world usually takes place in March. In the United States, June is Pride month.
Why is June Pride month? In the United States, Pride Month is celebrated in the month of June to commemorate the Stonewall riots, a series of riots that erupted throughout New York City in June and July of 1969. These riots were a response to the police raid of the Stonewall Inn in New York City’s Greenwich Village, a popular gathering place for the young LGBT community during the early hours of June 28th, 1969. The police arrested employees for selling liquor without a license and roughed up the many patrons inside the inn. As police dragged patrons out of the bar and into police vans, people outside the bar watched and grew increasingly enraged. A riot soon ensued and continued for the next five days. Historians mark the Stonewall riots as a turning point in the gay rights movement.
This year marks the 53rd anniversary of what historians consider the start of annual Pride traditions. Why? On June 28th, 1970, a year after the Stonewall riots, an estimated 3,000 to 5,000 people marched down the streets of New York City to protest the abuse and discrimination that the LGBTQ community had suffered for hundreds of years. Today, millions of people around the country celebrate Pride Month with parades, festivals, workshops, and remembrance ceremonies to acknowledge the LGBTQ community and its impact on the world.
How is your city celebrating pride this year? Share with us by emailing editor@xyzanews.com.
We're two perfectly imperfect moms who have five very different kids between the two of us. We believe that topics in news are a fantastic way to spark conversations in families. That's why we started the Dinner Table Conversation series here at Xyza: News for Kids. Won't you join us in the conversation?
There’s no better time than now to head into nature, pitch a tent and sleep under the stars. Camping is one of the best ways to disconnect from your screens, and reconnect with the outside world. In doing so, it’s important to protect and preserve wild spaces for future generations to enjoy. Camping sustainable means minimizing your impact on the environment around you and leaving no trace.
Here are some recommendations for making your next camping adventure as sustainable as possible:
1. Gear: Buy Used Gear, Borrow & Donate
If you don’t camp more than a few times a year, try borrowing or renting gear rather than buying your own. If you have your own gear and it’s older or damaged, reach out to the manufacturers to inquire about repair programs. When I look for “new to me” equipment, I check used online marketplaces, it’s amazing how many people camp or hike only a few times and then decide to sell their equipment.
2. E-waste & Fuel: Bring Rechargeable & Solar Products
When you are in the market for a new lantern, look for one that is rechargeable or solar powered—or best yet, both! In this way you can avoid the use of non-rechargeable batteries. You can find rechargeable headlamps, speakers, and charging blocks to help you avoid battery waste. One pound propane tanks are popular for small camp stoves and grills, but the resulting single-use canisters are hazardous waste. Refillable small propane tanks are more difficult to find, but if you live in an area serviced like Little Kamper or another similar company, take advantage of the ability to avoid waste.
3. Food: Minimize Packaging
Pack your food in reusable containers rather than relying on small packaged goods. Try chopping your fruits and vegetables in advance if you can, so you can compost the food scraps at home. If you’re eating meals on reusable dishes and have to wash them in the wild, be mindful of the soap you’re using. Standard dish detergent is hard on the environment. Bring biodegradable soap, and keep it at least 200 feet away from natural water sources.
Opt for compostable tableware like from World Centric, including plant-based plates, cups, bowls, cutlery and more can make campsite eating a little easier. Just be sure to properly bag and pack out all of your compostables and food scraps, and leave no trace.
4. Stay Local
You don’t have to travel far to get offline, and you may be surprised at the beautiful open spaces that are right in your own backyard. Camping locally reduces the distance you have to travel, thus reducing your emissions. It can also help you better explore your own surroundings and community. During the height of the pandemic when travel was more restricted, I found the best remote campsite just a couple hours from my home. My county parks’ campgrounds offered a great easy car camping experience within minutes from my house.
5. Build Responsible Campfires
If you see a fire ban in place where you’re camping, it exists for a reason. This year has been one of the hottest and driest years on record in many parts of the world. With dry seasons comes the risk of wildfires, so please respect these bans. Keep campfires where permitted and contained to fire pits, and never burn toxic materials like trash, paperboard or anything plastic.
6. Respect the Wildlife
When hiking, going off-trail can be harmful to plants and animals. Be sure to stay on the trail and leave rocks and other artifacts where they are. If you encounter wildlife while hiking or camping, keep your distance for your own safety and theirs. Never leave food out around your campsite overnight, as it can attract animals.
7. Use Refillable Water Jugs & Bottles
Skip buying prefilled single-use water bottles or gallon jugs of water. Bring reusables and refill your own. You can pack enough filled bottles with what you anticipate needing, or invest in a water purifier.
8. Reduce Gross Waste
It’s not fun to talk about, but toilet paper is a source of litter at parks and recreation areas. Avoid using toilet paper in the wild by investing in a small refillable bidet, and for women, buying a reusable antibacterial cloth. Always bury your waste and compostable toilet paper (if using) according to local guidelines, which usually include burying it at least six inches deep and 200 feet from water.
Lauren K. Olson is the Zero Waste Manager at World Centric. Lauren holds a Master's degree in Community Sustainability specializing in decision-making about waste, and a Bachelor of Science's degree in Environmental Economics-- both degrees from Michigan State University
With many schools going back to virtual learning this month (BIG SIGH), it’s a good time to have a check-in about the do’s and don’ts of “Zoom etiquette.” Make sure your student’s workspace is ready with this TikTok-famous Bluetooth keyboard, a fun desk organizer and all the glitter pens that are forbidden at traditional school. Grab some blue light-blocking glasses and print out this handy list that will make them the teacher’s favorite in no time.
1. Be prepared. Just like any class at school, it's important to have all of your materials ready to go. For virtual school, that means you'll need to know the link, what time you need to be there and what books or printouts you'll need. Get your pencils sharpened in advance so you can be totally prepared to listen when the teacher comes on.
2. Be on time. Let's not waste the teacher's time. Be on time for your class meetings (or even a few minutes early). It's a good idea to test out the class link in advance of your call time, so you know that it works and your system is up and running. Print out your class schedules and post them on your wall as a reminder. Set an alarm (or ask a parent to do that) if you have a hard time remembering when to log on.
Andrea Piacquadio via Pexels
3. Learn how to use the virtual classroom program. Whether you are using Zoom, Google Classroom, WebEx or another program, it's important to know how it works. Learn how to enter the virtual classroom, mute and unmute yourself, turn off your camera and shut down the program. Is there a chat that you need to use? A way to indicate you are raising your hand? Find this out before the class starts.
4. Use headphones with a mic. It's easier for the class to hear from you when you need to talk if you are wearing headphones with an external microphone. Also, headphones will help you block out the distractions around you.
5. Stay in one spot during your call. Resist the urge to head to the kitchen for a snack or take your class meeting outside. It's distracting to your classmates to see you moving around during the class. Find a quiet spot where you will be comfortable for the whole class and make it your classroom spot. Remember, you are in class so lounging on your bed is not a good option. Sit at a desk or your kitchen table so you can have more focus.
6. Dress the part. While school uniforms aren't required for virtual schooling, you do want to make sure you look presentable for class. Change out of your pajamas (unless it is official pajama day), brush your hair and teeth and look presentable. Make sure any shirt you are wearing doesn't have any offensive graphics or text on it. Think about what you'd wear to school and dress accordingly.
Gladskikh Tatiana
7. Eliminate distractions. Keep in mind that class time is class time even when you are at home. Don't snack or chew gum during class. Turn off the music or the TV in the background. If you need to use the restroom, try to do that before class starts. Don't text or play on your cell phone during the class meeting.
8. Skip the virtual backgrounds. While some programs have fun options to add a virtual background, that can be super distracting to the other students. Unless your teacher has requested it, skip it. Also, it's good to clean up your room or sit in front of a blank wall to keep the mess to a minimum.
9. Wait for your turn. It's tough enough for teachers to manage a class when you are there in the same room. Virtual classes add a whole other challenge. Follow the teacher's instructions for volunteering and don't blurt out an answer unless you are called on. It can be a good idea to raise your hand instead of interrupting so that the teacher can finish the instructions before you jump in.
10. Remember, this is school. While it might be exciting to see your friends (finally!), this is not the time or place to chat about Minecraft or what you had for breakfast. If your virtual classroom has a chat feature, stay out of it unless the teacher requests students use it. Chat is public to everyone in the class (including the teacher), and it can be distracting.
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11. Respect your teachers! This is the most important rule of all! Respect your teachers and all the work they have done to teach you in the virtual classroom. This might be a challenge for them too; we are all learning together. Make sure they know how much you appreciate them. The best way to do this is with good behavior in the virtual classroom (and gift cards don't hurt either!).
Always ask permission as a sign of respect and consideration for the child’s experience and perspective.
Approach with a gentle stride and a calm demeanor. Place your hand on their back and sweetly ask, “May I check your diaper? Then wait for 7-to-10 seconds, giving them time to respond.
When a child says “no” and it is necessary to change it, honor the “no” by responding, “I hear you, you aren’t ready, I can come back in a few minutes and ask again.” When you return, the intent and verbiage should be different. “I am back. It is time to change your diaper now. Are you ready?”
If a child says no again: “You still aren’t ready, I understand, hmmm, I am worried if the pee or poop sit in your diaper, it may give you a rash, and I want to keep your skin and body safe, it is time now.” Then acknowledge the disruption by explaining how you will support them. “I see you are busy playing, so I will do it quickly so you can come right back to play.” More respect and acknowledgment of them and their perspective. You are building partnership and modeling respectful behavior in relationships.
Stick with respect and offer choices, so they feel like they are in control. “Would you like to walk to the diaper table, or would you like me to carry you?” This is a crucial moment for the child, you, your relationship, and future diaper changes because you are honoring the child’s experience and this detail is not going to be lost on them. In fact, they are taking it all in, making notes on what respect feels like. You are planting some serious and powerful seeds in these moments.
If they resist moving and plant their feet or throw their body down, say (and this is a gem that you will use often) “Ah, I heard you say you wanted to walk, but now you are choosing to stay still, you are telling me you want me to carry you, I would be happy to help.” Then bend down, still with love and kindness, pick up their body and carry them to the changing table.
The key in these moments is to avoid engaging in this resistant behavior. Your only job is to steady the course, no matter what attempt at distraction your little throws your way. This is a stellar opportunity to practice acceptance of all choices. Whatever the child does, accept it, take it in, and adapt but steady the course. This diaper change Is happening, buddy.
Children want us to be leaders because it permits them to be leaders in their own lives. Even though they are making it hard for you, they are testing your relationship.
When you steady the course and don’t let them pull you into their distraction, they feel loved by you. When you let them distract you or wear you down and/or abandon your mission, they question your commitment to them, and you become untrustworthy.
Here is another opportunity to model respect and ask, “May I pick you up?”
Typically, they will raise their little hands to say yes. Asking if you can pick allows them to prepare their body to be picked up. As soon as you ask the question, their brains communicate to their bodies to flex the necessary muscles to prepare to be picked up. This enables your child to feel strong and participate when you pick them up. Grabbing a child to pick them up without warning is shocking and scary. Asking and waiting until you have their attention and permission will support them physically, mentally, and will build more trust between you both.
Now that the child is in your arms, gently and lovingly lay them down, supporting their head and entire body until they are lying comfortably.
Once the child is lying comfortably, take a breath, lay your hand gently on their belly and look into their eyes. Smile sweetly and ask, “Are you ready?” Wait for them to respond and then begin the diaper change.
First: Ask them to help while you remove their bottoms. “Will you please lift your legs in the air so I can remove your bottoms?” then watch as they gleefully shoot their legs in the air.
Second: Tell them what you are doing next. “I am going to use this wipe to clean your body. It may be a little cold.” Then gently wipe them and, if necessary, hold their legs up with a gentle, respectful grip.
Third: Hold the new diaper and show it to them. “I am going to put this fresh diaper on you now. Will you please lift your legs again?” They are usually thrilled to assist you in this way, and their legs go flying in the air. “Thank you! That is so helpful.” Then slide the diaper under their bottom and ask them to please lower their legs back down.
This level of commitment to respectful interaction around diaper changes will create a beautiful relationship between you and the children you care for. They will rarely resist having a diaper change because the experience will be rich in connection, and connection leads to cooperation.
Avoid giving children electronics to distract them during a diaper change. You will be teaching them to check out when someone is touching them.
Avoid negative responses to how their poop smells or how much they pooped. It is embarrassing and disrespectful to make fun of how a child’s body creates smelly or gross things. They will interpret it to mean they are gross or smelly. Stay neutral, matter of fact, no big deal, all in a day’s work.
Stay present with your little one when changing a diaper. Stay off the phone and avoid interruption until the diaper change is complete. Make eye contact as much as possible and talk with them about the details. They love you. They trust you. This is a beautiful time to honor them, teach them, and model kindness.
Sarah is a child behavior & respectful child care expert. She has been coaching parents in effective respectful care strategy for over 10 years. She makes complex parenting issues simple to navigate and her methods are clear, effective and provide immediate relief for both parent and child.ehavior specialist and
When I realized I was going to be a #boymom, I mentally prepared myself for a lot of things from being completely surrounded by testosterone to having to wipe the toilet down multiple times a day. What I wasn’t prepared for was the influx of outdated and insulting stereotypical phrases directed towards young boys.
From the moment onlookers experienced my five-year-old’s heartwarming hugs or my 2-year-old’s swoon-worthy dimples, I’d be bombarded with “compliments” ranging from “He’s gonna break some hearts” to “That’s an aspiring lady killer” and “He’ll definitely be a ladies man.” And then, we have “Boys don’t cry.” “Boys will be boys.” “Boys are much rougher than girls.” Every time those remarks hit my ear, I’d instantly cringe. I understood there was no malice behind these phrases. They were people making conversation, trying to connect. But what I heard were stereotypes being perpetuated onto my young sons. And these stereotypes had the capacity to do very real damage to their sense of self, their relationships, and even their safety. Let me explain.
I believe children hear and absorb more than we realize. But young children don’t necessarily have the capacity to decipher these supposed “well-meaning” phrases. If they hear them enough and start internalizing them, there’s a chance they become a reflection of those stereotypes. They become boys who grow up to lack respect for another person’s body and personal space, demean another’s display of emotions and not feel the need to be held responsible for it because “boys will be boys.” That is not what I want for my kids.
And it’s even more essential for me to shut down these stereotypes because I’m the mom to two Black boys. When I hear them, I feel like these phrases have the potential to erase the small dose of innocence little Black boys are allowed in a world destined to vilify them. Being wild and rough, or being a “heartbreaker” in relationships are generalizations society routinely associates with Black men. However, the difference is that when Black boys absorb those generalizations, there is little grace that may be extended to white children. According to a 2014 study conducted by the American Psychological Association, Black boys are viewed as older and less innocent in comparison to white boys from the age of 10—which leads to harsher disciplinary actions.
Words have power. I want my children to be well-adjusted, functioning members of society. That’s why I do everything in my power to not only shower them with positive affirmations, but I correct any adult who dares repeat those narrow minded ideologies about or around my children in the hopes they will one day learn the error in their words.
Until then, I’ll continue to do what I can to surround my boys with positive images of masculinity and defy gender stereotypes in the hopes that they will learn that “boys will not be boys.” Instead, boys can aspire to be “good people.”
—Written by Terri Huggins Hart Terri Huggins Hart is a nationally-published journalist, freelance writer, and public speaker. Find her on Instagram @terrificwords.
Elizabeth Brunner is a San Francisco-based designer and the founder of StereoType, a gender-free, style-forward kids clothing brand that’s designed to celebrate individuality and freedom of self-expression by blending traditional ideas of boys’ and girls’ wear. StereoType combines style, design and comfort to inspire creativity, individuality and freedom of expression.
When I was little, I always knew I was in trouble by the size of my mother’s eyes. If I did something wrong, her eyes widened to reveal every inch of white and her disappointment. My Mom was never a yeller—she always spoke in an even tone, and communicated very well about what we needed to correct regarding our behavior or attitude. I believe the way she reacted taught me and my siblings many lessons about respect.
Remember respect? I feel like this is a lost virtue in the world today, especially between children and adults. Somehow we have communicated to children that they are equal with adults, and I don’t know about you, but that’s not the world I grew up in! We were taught to respect our elders; to learn from our elders.
Now, let me clarify: respecting our elders does NOT mean we teach our children to not respect themselves, or suppress their voices or discourage them from even finding their voices. Respect is something we have to teach by example, and once that is accomplished, respect should be a mutual dance that is done easily and instinctively. But, it starts in the sandbox. And it starts with you.
First, it’s gut-check time: how are you showing your children what respect means and what respect is? I am a visual learner, and I believe most kids are. You want to show them how to treat people, not just tell them. As a parent or caretaker, let’s take inventory of how you treat your friends, family, strangers, etc? More importantly, how do you treat others when you don’t agree with them?
I see parents yelling at the TV because they’re watching the news and they disagree with commentators. To think your kids aren’t watching you, hearing you, or taking in your energy is shortsighted. That moment, as small as you may think it is, speaks volumes. What you are teaching your child, as they watch your emotions get the best of you, is that if you disagree with someone or something, you can yell/scream/cuss—whatever you want because you “feel like it.”
I understand that we can’t edit our reactions, nor should we try and suppress emotions, but I do believe we need to teach our children that there is a right and wrong way to react and to communicate our feelings. Perhaps they are just getting in tussles on the playground right now, but they will have bigger problems later in life that you need to prepare them for now. They will be faced with challenging moments that stress them out; hurt them; incite them, etc. It’s our job to give them the tools to react to whatever arena they’re dropped in with the self-respect, and respect of others, that they and we all deserve.
This may sound like a daunting task what I am asking, but if you step back, I am not asking anything from you that isn’t basic: it comes down to manners. Saying “please,” “thank you,” “pardon me,” “I appreciate you,” etc. We need to give our kids this language and we need to remember to practice it, too. Holding doors for people, being a helper when we see someone in need, approaching people from a place of empathy and compassion, etc—these are all lessons we need to teach our children, and the only way to successfully do that is by showing them how we treat others and how we treat them. Yes, you read that right—treating our children with respect is how they learn to respect themselves and respect others.
We also have to be mindful of our village: the people influencing our children. Maybe this is extended family, grandparents, friends, teachers, or even our children’s friends. You are the company you keep, as they say. This is yet another lesson our kids need to learn from the jump. If they hang around troublemakers, chances are they are going to get into more mischief. You can’t always control who your children choose as friends, but you certainly need to be paying attention to it. Sometimes your child’s behavior, especially if erratic or if you’re seeing changes over time, is being influenced by something or, more likely, someone.
If you ever witness your children’s friends being disrespectful, I give you permission to step in. I am not telling you to spank or punish, but you certainly have the authority to let that child know that there are rules in your house and specific behavior won’t be tolerated. Of course, there is a fine line we don’t want to cross when it comes to correcting or disciplining other people’s children, but try to remember that you’re measuring it based on the values of your home. It’s simple: either they align with your values or they don’t. And, if they don’t, then maybe that friendship isn’t meant to be.
Regardless of your definition of respect, there is one thing we can all agree on: we want the best for our kids, and we want to raise them to be kind and spread it. The way to do that? Respect.
Florence Ann Romano, The Windy City Nanny™ (WindyCityNanny.com), is an author,
philanthropist and web series star/host who has always had a special place in her heart for
children.
Dads often serve as the first male role models for their daughters, shaping a girl’s worldview of how men interact with those around them, how they process (or don’t process) their emotional selves, and how they show what they truly value. The things father figures do with their daughters are important, of course, but what’s arguably just as important are the things they say. We asked around and gathered 15 things every daughter should hear from her dad. Keep reading to see them all.
2. It's okay to ask for help. Studies have shown that most men don't want to or don't know how to ask for help because they've been taught it's a sign of weakness to need assistance. But, if you show that you aren't afraid to reach out for advice, knowledge or guidance, you'll be able to teach your daughter how to do the same.
Kipp Jarecke-Cheng
3. Your mother/father is my best friend. Modeling a strong and positive relationship with your spouse directly affects the kinds of relationships that children pursue with their friends and peers now as well as later in life. Daughters with fathers who respect and cherish their spouses will mirror that behavior in the relationships that they have in their childhood and beyond.
4. Do what makes you happy. Your daughter will see you go to work every day, follow your hobbies and passions. It's important that she knows life isn't just about how much money you make or how many winning teams you're on, but if you're happy while it's happening.
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5. I'm here for you, always. Kids need to know that they can count on you, even when they're teenagers. You want your daughter to ask you about boys and other grown-up stuff because you've been there.
6. I’m sad. Don’t be afraid to let your daughter know when you’re feeling down. Studies have shown a direct correlation between a parent’s ability to express emotion and a child’s social competence. A parent’s expression of positive emotion toward his child is generally associated with better social development for the child. Conversely, a parent’s negative emotional expression and poor social development can adversely impact the emotional and social development of a child.
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7. Let me tell you a secret. Share a secret with your daughter. She’ll appreciate your candor and vulnerability. And maybe she’ll share a secret of her own with you.
8. Let’s play football. As adults, we sometimes forget that play is an essential part of childhood. For dads, we can sometimes feel more comfortable rough-housing with our sons, but our daughters want to get in on the action, too. For fathers of daughters, there’s no reason why we can’t toss a football with our daughters.
10. What do you think? When you ask your daughter for advice, you show that her opinion matters and that you respect her. Plus, you might be surprised by her answers and be able to look at a problem with a fresh perspective.
11. I’m so grateful that I get to be your dad. In the hustle and bustle of daily life, it’s easy to forget to express gratitude. Letting our daughters know how lucky and proud we are to be their dad can remind them that we are there for them and that we don’t take our role for granted.
13. Never let anyone pressure you. Whether it's bullying another kid, breaking the rules, or being talked into doing something physical she doesn't want to do, daughters need to truly understand that she's got the power to say no and walk away at any time.
15. I love you. Tell your daughter that you love her every day. Tell her multiple times a day. Tell her even when she thinks it’s corny. Tell her because you do.
What is systemic racism, or anti-racism? Tough questions that even adults can struggle to answer. American Girl has released a new advice book, A Smart Girl’s Guide: Race & Inclusion that will help readers 10 and up understand these concepts and more, plus help normalize the conversation around race.
You can buy the book online today for $12.99 and the it’s more than 100 pages, with full-color illustrations, tips, quizzes and challenges. It’s written by Deanna Singh, a highly respected thought leader and diversity and inclusion expert. Plus it benefits from expert advisors who reviewed the manuscript: Traci Baxley, Ed.D., a professor of multicultural education and curriculum and instruction at Florida Atlantic University; and Deborah Rivas-Drake, Ph.D., a professor of education and psychology at the University of Michigan, who works to disrupt racism and xenophobia.
“We’re proud to add Race & Inclusion to our popular Smart Girl’s Guide series, which has served as a trusted resource for our readers and their families for nearly three decades,” said Jamie Cygielman, General Manager of American Girl. “It’s our hope that the age-appropriate information and real-life guidance found in the book will be an important step for all those seeking to create a more compassionate world where everyone is treated fairly and with respect.”
Today’s release is part of American Girl’s commitment to engage more diverse voices and create new content to help advance racial equality. Among other initiatives, the brand recently launched Conversations for Change, a series that amplifies young women of various backgrounds and experiences making a difference in their communities. American Girl strives to help girls be their best and this new book will certainly make a difference!
Traveling with teens and tweens can present challenges, but it can also be loads of fun and great way to bond as a family. There are lots of ways to help make traveling with teens a lot less stressful. As the mom of a 15-year old, I’ve learned some tricks and tips! Here are 10 tips to help make your trip a rewarding and enjoyable experience for everyone in your family.
1. Include teens in the planning process. It’s a family vacation, so why not include the whole family when it comes to making the plans? Teens have definite likes and dislikes. If you engage them from the start of the vacation planning process – listen to their ideas, have them help research destinations and activities – they will feel empowered and get excited about the trip.
You can also enlist their help in planning the itinerary once you know where you are going. If they have a favorite type of food, let them research local restaurants. Have them look at the websites for the hotels you are considering, and let them give input on which one looks the best. The more your teen is involved in the planning process, the more vested they will be in having a good time on the trip!
2. Consider letting them bring a friend. If your teen is an only child or has siblings that are not close in age, consider allowing him to invite a friend! This will give your teen a buddy to talk and have fun with, and take the pressure off you (as the parents) being the only source of company for your teen while on vacation.
3. Visit a place they’ve read about. History comes alive when you visit the place something happened, and the same thing goes for literature. Kids read a lot of books in middle and high school. If you go to a place they’ve read about, that will bring a whole new appreciation for the book to your teen.
4. Make sure they get some free time. Traveling with teens is all about enjoying time together as a family, but too much of a good thing can get old for teens who are used to hanging with their friends. Make sure they have a little free time worked into every day so they can do their own thing. Whether it is going to the hotel gym on their own or having some downtime in the hotel room to text with friends or play games online, a little free time will go far.
5. Respect their privacy. Your kid may have had no problem running around a hotel room naked when they were little, but teenagers embarrass easily and are very private. Give them the respect they need. Don’t try to go into the bathroom to brush your teeth while they’re in the shower, and don’t say things that might make them self-conscious. In fact, the biggest favor you can do for a teen is leave the room for half an hour and let them take care of their business in peace!
6. Do a good deed on vacation. Vacations are a good opportunity to give back. Doing good for others is an awesome feeling, and a great value to instill upon your children. For this reason, I am a huge fan of volunteer vacations! But you don’t always have to plan your entire trip around volunteering; sometimes just a day or one activity on your itinerary can make a huge difference. If your goal is to leave a positive impact while setting out on new adventures, find a way to volunteer while you’re on your trip. It can be as simple as going to an animal sanctuary and leaving a small donation or participating in a charity event while visiting a new city.
7. Plan on some active activities. Even if your idea of a great vacation is lying on the beach 24/7, teens have energy to burn. Make sure you include some activities that will help everyone stay active and healthy on your vacation. Now, does that mean you have to go zip lining through the jungle or propel down a mountain? No, of course not! Active can mean taking a simple hike, renting bikes, or participating in some water sports at a nearby beach.
8. Let them pick the playlist. If your teen is into music, put them in charge of the road trip playlist. Or at least let them pick the radio station. My son and I made the five-hour drive to Vegas not too long ago and letting him stream the music he loved was actually a cool, unexpected bonding experience on the long trip. (Who knew he liked so many of the ’80s metal bands I listened to in high school?!)
9. Choose a hotel with free breakfast. Teens like to eat—a lot! When you’re away from home relying on eating out for every meal, the cost of food can add up quickly! Do your budget a favor and book a hotel that offers a complimentary breakfast. Even if it’s just fruit and some waffles, filling up in the morning until lunchtime will save you a ton of money in the long run.
10. Be flexible. My final and possibly most important tip is to be flexible! As anyone with a teen likely knows, they can be a moody bunch. Don’t schedule out every minute of every day when you are traveling with teens. If you keep your plans flexible, everyone in your family will have a good time.
Time goes by quickly and your teens will soon be adults. You’ll always be a family, but family vacations may look very different in the future. Enjoy the time you have together and be flexible and understanding to make sure the memories you’re making will be good ones for everyone!
I am a travel writer, wife, mother and believer in all things happy and healthy. I created my family travel website, CaliforniaFamilyTravel.com, to share the best tips, destinations and experiences in California and beyond for active, healthy families.
I use the word “obsessed” a lot, especially when it comes to my five-year-old autistic son, Johnny. He really gets into certain toys, songs, and shows. It annoys my husband that I use the word so much. “He’s not obsessed, he just likes it” and to his credit, the interest comes and goes often even though he does fixate for a short time.
The one thing—not even my husband can den—is that Johnny is obsessed with my stomach. The kid loves it. It can drive me insane, but something about it fascinates and comforts him. Sometimes it is in a silly, squishing my flab, way; other times it is him resting his usually restless head on it, or hiding his face in it when he is anxious or nervous in public.
I’m sure it stems from the hours of skin to skin as a baby, the comfort of laying on mommy as a toddler, and all the encouragement to touch and love on it when it held his little sister.
The older he gets the more we work on the appropriateness of it. He’s still little, but attempting to lift up my shirt at home or grab my tummy in public isn’t going to work. He has to learn to respect my space and body. The moment I lie down when he’s around he goes straight for it. You will hear “no belly” often, in our home.
The thing is, sometimes I look at my belly in the mirror after the shower and think I feel ashamed of it. My 30’s belly is much different than the almost flat stomach from my 20’s. My workouts come and go, as do my healthy eating habits. I try but I’m also a tired and exhausted mom who has been through many ups and downs.
So, I won’t lie, he’s not catching rock hard abs there, It’s surely a comfortable and soft pillow.
The neat thing is he doesn’t see it as fat, or unhealthy, or shame, he simply sees it as mom, comfort, and safety.
No judgment, just love.
My son loves a part of me that I find hard to, and that changes the way I see it. Don’t worry I’m not using it as an excuse to stay unhealthy or out of shape, but it is a reminder of my son’s beautiful, unconditional acceptance and love.
So when I stand in the mirror looking at that belly, I can say it’s the way it is because I carried two beautiful children in it and because I’m a special needs mom who has had some really hard days. It’s not perfect because there is not time for perfection in my life right now, maybe there never will be. But I am doing my best and that’s okay.
I’m loved and accepted no matter what, by my son.
Johnny is different. The amazing thing about him is that he does not judge. He doesn’t look for the flaws in others or make fun of others, instead, he seeks. Seeks what makes him happy, and what he loves.
There is something undeniably beautiful in that and I’m grateful for that unconditional love and for someone who truly loves my flaws.
Jaime Ramos, is a mom from Colorado. She's married to Isaac and has two kids, Amelie and Jesse. Jesse, her Johnny, is on the Autism Spectrum. She went to school to be a filmmaker, but now spends her days mainly as a stay at home mom.
