The past few weeks we’ve come to realize that life truly is a roller-coaster ride of uncertainties! The normalities we’ve become so accustomed to can suddenly shift in a matter of days or even just a few hours. The challenge of e-learning lies in the balance of our own work schedules and our child’s school schedule. How do we fit it all in? Some days the idea of maintaining equilibrium means just getting everyone out of bed before 10 a.m. and not arguing over what Netflix shows to watch.
Another consideration is our technology skills…or lack thereof. We can feel so technologically savvy until we have to log in to our child’s online learning platform and we realize that the password doesn’t work. Isn’t that the most frustrating thing?! It’s like we’ve resorted back to the 1980s with some of these online programs! I have had to reset so many of my passwords that I am running out of ways to be creative with the spelling of my dog’s name!
The one silver lining is that we are all in this together! We are learning and making adjustments as we go. Everyone’s e-learning experience is different based on each child’s age and functioning level. Secondary age children are much more independent in their learning expectations, whereas elementary-age children require a more collaborative, hands-on methodology of learning.
Set Up a Routine and Schedule
First, you must come to the realization that as a parent you are not perfect! Perfection can be the enemy of progress. What works for your family one day might not work the next day and that is okay. The important thing to remember is that effective parenting requires flexibility.
Each morning create a daily schedule and post it somewhere central for all to see. Start with your own work schedule and the non-negotiables for your job duties. Then build from there to include your child’s schedule. If you have more than one child, alternate the times where one child needs adult assistance and the other can work more independently on something (i.e.: a puzzle or time on the iPad). Be sure and include some form of physical activity in the schedule. Exercise not only improves mental capacity and mood but also can help regulate your child’s energy levels. And last but not least, schedule “me time” for yourself to maintain your sanity (even if it’s just taking a bath or sitting in your car listening to your favorite song from high school, reminiscing on the time when you didn’t have kids or responsibilities yet).
Provide Appropriate Attention to All
Now is the time to look at your family dynamics and try to find creative ways to employ your children to help each other. If you have an older child, schedule him/her to help “teach” the younger child. After you have laid out your daily schedule, make sure you have allotted enough time for your younger child to have hands-on assistance. The amount of 1:1 assistance will depend on the age and the functioning level of the child. Help get your child started on the task then find ways to fade yourself out while promoting independence.
Rewards and Consequences
Don’t forget about your social contract for the home. This tool should be your “go-to” for this new type of home/work environment. If you have a child that is struggling with the work demands, consider setting up a reward system for him/her. It can be as simple as a sticker chart for completing parts of each task. Once he/she earns a set number of stickers, then a larger reward can be obtained. A reward system can help promote independence as well. Ideally, the “consequence” is not earning the smaller rewards that lead to the larger reward. Be careful and thoughtful when choosing consequences. For example…If you have a child that is refusing to work, “time-out” would not be effective since you would be giving in to what they want (which is to avoid the task). Talk to your child about what he/she would like to earn for following the social contract and exhibiting good work behaviors. Give your child unconventional examples of rewards, like building a pillow fort together, or helping to cook their favorite recipe, or having a coffee date with a parent. Their first thought of a reward may be screen time, but they’re likely getting much of that already, and could benefit more from creative together time.
Remember, you’re not alone in this, we’re all together in having to get creative and learn as we go. The best thing we can do for our families is to have patience, understanding, and flexibility. Give yourself and your community grace, and take things day by day.
Before joining Village, Dana worked in public education for fourteen years as a Special Education Counselor, Autism Coordinator, Special Education Supervisor, and Assistant Director of Special Programs. Throughout her educational career, Dana assists students, parents, and staff with the social/emotional component of learning. She enjoys spending time with family, traveling, and shopping.
It’s been a few weeks now and it’s possible that your time in quarantine is wearing on you. The days seem to blur into one another and it can feel like you’re living the same day over and over again. As a friend said to me, the weekends aren’t feeling like weekends anymore. And to add to it, you’re in tight quarters with partners, family, kids, maybe your in-laws and you know that the only way through this time is to keep these relationships fun, easy, and tension-free. And while you know this, you’re probably wondering how to accomplish it, because every day is bringing new challenges and battles. To make your time with those you’re sequestered with easier, try adding the following practices to your day.
1. Ask for what you need. If there was ever a time to start asking for what you need it’s now. And to ask for what you need you first have to figure out what it is you do need. Do you need your partner to let you know when they have work calls, when they’re in the middle of something, when they’ll have time to watch the kids? Do you need your kids to have independent playtime, yoga time so you get some exercise in as well, or have them make their own breakfast and lunch? Do you need time for yourself to go on a walk, sit in silence with a cup of tea? What do you need to make this time in quarantine easier for you? Once you’ve identified it then it’s time to ask for it. Asking for what you need helps your relationships in quarantine because you won’t be bottling up wants that lead to frustration that turns into passive-aggressive behavior or shutting down or lashing out.
2. Listen to what others need. While it’s important for you to know what you need and ask for it, it’s equally important that you create a safe and open environment for those you’re with to share with you what they need as well. To do this it starts with cultivating non-judgmental attention. To see the person through loving eyes, as someone you care for, want to be supportive of and to help. How can I be helpful to this person is something to ask yourself during an interaction. This question will help you stay present in your conversations. So when you begin to notice you’re judging, thinking you know better, distracted, thinking about what you have to do, what you want to say, what you think the other person is thinking, that’s when you say to yourself, I want to be helpful instead.
3. Lower expectations of self and others. The pressure we put on ourselves can really impact our relationships in quarantine. Our expectations of this time can cause more fights, meltdowns, and an overall sense of less than or not good enough, which creates more unease in our relationships. When you notice yourself forcing or stressing, see if it’s out of an expectation you have that’s not being met. To release some of your expectations, make a list of yours for yourself, your partner, your children. Then choose two from each list that you can start to pay attention to. When you notice them come up, silently say to yourself, there’s my expectation, I’m going to move it to the side and see if I can allow this moment to be as it is—no forcing or wanting it to be different.
Trying out the three practices above will give you more of an opportunity to relax with those you’re in quarantine with and make it easier for you to create more fun moments to look back on.
Cynthia Kane is a certified meditation and mindfulness instructor and the founder of the Kane Intentional Communication Institute. She is the author of How to Communicate Like a Buddhist, Talk to Yourself Like a Buddhist, and the upcoming book, How To Meditate Like A Buddhist.
So, you just had a baby. Congratulations! Or you’ve decided to be a stay-at-home mom. It’s really great at first! Plenty of time to savor special moments with your child. You can get tasks done, and maybe have a little time for yourself. But all those hours alone with your kiddo are starting to get, well…boring.
You need to join a Moms group. Why? You need social interaction, parenting help and play opportunities for your child. But how do you find the right group for you?
Here are some tips to find the perfect Moms group, for you and your children.
1. Consider Your Interests: Think about your interests and the unique things about you, so you know where to find other moms like yourself. Is fitness important to you? Then look for a local stroller jogging group, or Mommy and Me Yoga program.
Are you a person of faith? There are lots of clubs sponsored by local churches, or groups that are faith-based, like MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers).
Is there something special about your family or kids and you’d love to meet others like you? Mom to multiples? Try Multiples of America. There are often groups that cater to each unique situation.
2. Location is Important: Once you think about the type of club you’d like to join, keep the location in mind as well. It’s helpful to join a group that meets close to you, to make getting together as easy as possible. The reality is that it’s already a challenge to pack your diaper bag, get kids out the door and make it someplace on time. (or close to on time). The closer your group meets to your home, the better.
Some mom groups are designed exactly this way. MOMS Club, International prides itself on being a local, neighborhood group. Chapters are divided geographically, sometimes into small sections in highly populated areas. Closer proximity means it’s easy to meet, and you already have things in common because you live nearby. You share the same parks and know where the closest Chick Fil A is. And later, your kids may attend the same elementary schools and they’ll start kindergarten with friends!
3. Turn to Technology: Sometimes you can’t find the group of moms you click with, or you may have another challenge such as living in a rural area. You can always go online and find or create your own group. Sites like Meetup and Nextdoor can easily put you in touch with existing groups or moms near you. Facebook also has a variety of groups, and there are apps to make finding mom friends much easier.
· Peanut-similar to Tinder, but for moms-is a great way to connect with moms who think like you do.
· Mom.life, a global social network with its own digital currency!
· Hello Mamas, is also an easy way to make friends and share this thing called motherhood.
You’ve chosen an amazing path-to focus on raising your kids above all else. (at least temporarily) But you can’t do it alone!
Join a Moms group to make the journey easier. Your family and your sanity will thank you.
Amanda is a freelance writer for hire in the travel and parenting fields. She is always looking for an adventure! Whether across town or across the globe. Her favorite adventure is being a mom to Maya and Samuel. Visit her blog at LoveLifeAdventure.com.
When was the last time you had a second to catch your breath and enjoy a moment of “me” time? Self-care isn’t just a selfish indulgence. It’s a must-do. One Chicago mom is determined to make it easier to fit more of that essential, self-care-focused ‘me time’ into the lives of parents across Chicagoland. Read on to learn how the new MeTime app is making finding last-minute childcare for your kids a cinch so you can grab ahold of some of that elusive alone time.
photo: MeTime Founders
Self-care: a necessity, not an indulgence
Shortly after she went on maternity leave, Chicago mom Kayla Carey contracted a brutal case of mastitis, an inflammation of breast tissue often accompanied by flu-like symptoms.
“I needed to take my son Liam with me as I went to the doctor and the pharmacy for treatment while finding the stamina to take care of him throughout the day,” said Carey.
With her husband out of town for work and without regular childcare, Carey needed a babysitter STAT. Unable to secure a last-minute sitter, she spent the whole day caring for a newborn, despite desperately needing to rest and recover.
“The whole experience was exhausting, but I couldn’t find an alternative on short notice,” she said.
This situation prompted Carey to wonder whether other parents dealt with the same balancing act of self-care and care-giving.
“Most parents know the struggle of finding affordable childcare that fits their schedules. On top of that, there’s a daily negotiation of how to find some time for yourself,” she said. “Parents, especially moms, feel like they need to do it all, and often for others, leaving nothing left for themselves.”
Need last-minute childcare? There’s an app for that!
Carey decided to take action: She paired with a pal, Toi Valentine, and the duo harnessed their combined professional experience in healthcare, business strategy and product design to create trymetime.com a web-based platform for parents to find and book drop-in childcare in the greater Chicago region and Northwest Indiana.
The technology-enabled childcare co-op platform is one of the first services of its kind as a drop-in childcare aggregator and booking tool.
“Flexibility is hard to come by, so many parents are forced to find their own workarounds — whether that’s a change to their position at work or informal childcare arrangements with other parents,” said Carey, who serves as the co-founder and chief executive officer of MeTime. “Just like any caregiver, parents need a respite from time to time.”
“MeTime was born of necessity. Parents need more options for childcare than what exists today, especially millennial parents. They have different needs and lifestyles than those of our parents before us,” co-founder Valentine said, who serves as MeTime’s Chief Product Officer. “However, even if parents find flexibility in their professional and personal lives, they still need flexible childcare to match their needs.”
How it works
MeTime helps parents locate childcare options near home or their points of interest, such as the gym or grocery store, on an interactive map. The map displays the type of provider, the distance from your location, the provider’s amenities and photos of both the provider and their child-friendly space.
All of the providers undergo rigorous vetting, including background, home inspections for child safety and reference checks, in order to be listed on MeTime.
MeTime users can book as little as one hour of care up to a full day. The platform has approximately 1,500 hours of childcare per week as its current capacity. To meet the anticipated demand, MeTime is adding providers to its network — such as licensed daycare centers, in-home providers and playspace drop-ins — on a rolling basis. The co-founders hope to expand to several other cities by the end of next year.
Schedule self-care on-the-spot STAT
“Self-care is a necessity, not an indulgence,” says Emma Bennett, LCSW, who specializes in working with new moms. “We need to nurture ourselves just like we nurture our children. If we don’t take care of ourselves, feelings of depletion, resentment, and isolation could potentially arise. I feel more centered and present after taking time to engage in self-care, and strongly believe in building it into my daily agenda.”
Ready to book a little ‘me time’? Visit trymetime.com to learn more or to schedule a little self-care STAT.
My personal connection with my grandparents—Wallace and Clara—was very strong, even though we lived over an hour away from them in central Florida. The distance normally would have been a barrier to fostering a relationship, but my parents made sure that we remained in contact with them. When I think of my grandparents I immediately think of music and its role in creating memories while visiting them on holidays.
My grandmother, even though she wasn’t a fan of rap and ’80s and 90s popular music that I liked, she still allowed us to have a “good time” and celebrate whenever we visited our extended family. I also remember my grandmother telling me stories of her time as a young woman, especially when she moved to Harlem for about a year. Those stories helped form an independently, produced web series that I created.
That connection of music, my grandmother’s great storytelling, and my personal journey are all intertwined—and now I am using those same stories, music, and great characters to write and produce a web series based on conversations of events that happened almost 100 years ago.
The top 5 important lessons I learned from my grandmother are:
1. Family comes first, always. Keeping our family together was her priority. 2. Have faith in yourself and your abilities. My grandmother was very religious so her faith was her guide. In turn, I have channeled my own personal faith into growing as a person and believing that I can take risks in life and knowing I will be okay in the end. 3. Have the ability to compromise. In business and especially in my personal life, I have learned that people are appreciative of someone who is able to pivot from their experience or perspective and listen to their ideas and thoughts. 4. Live life unapologetically and on your own terms. She would always say that I shouldn’t let anything, and she meant anything deter me from achieving my goals. 5. Be of service to others. No matter if it is one person in your life or thousands. We all should try to make a difference in humanity.
And similar to her, I live life with few regrets. She told me that regrets are useless unless you want to continue to live in the past. There is too much living to do in order to move forward.
My grandfather was such a cool, well-dressed, family man who worked hard all of his life. Even as a child. He grew up on a farm where hard work is part and a particle of your daily life. I model my work ethic in my life after him as an entrepreneur. It is something that they passed down to my mother and ultimately my siblings and me.
Through their sacrifices, I saw first-hand what perseverance would achieve if I consistently pursued a goal. I applied this logic first to my approach to college and its challenges, then later on in my adult life. He was a quiet man, didn’t talk much, but as I got older I realized that he had lived a hard life but he managed to keep his family together and they felt loved.
Here are the top 5 lessons I learned from my grandfather:
1. Give everyone your full attention when having a conversation. I know it seems simple but, especially in today’s world, you have to compete with someone looking at his or her cell phone all the time. 2. Spread love and not hate. 3. Take time for yourself and do something you enjoy. He loved his car. I don’t remember the make/model but it was beautiful and he loved riding with his grandchildren. 4. Be the owner of your own life. Don’t give others the power to make you feel less than, ever. 5. Making mistakes is ok. Actually you haven’t really lived if you have never experienced something not working out as you had planned. Being human does not come with an instruction manual, a how-to-be-perfect guide.
Grandparents are great in the way they are treasure troves of life experiences and I learned to listen to their advice at a young age.
If they were alive, they would be very proud of how far I have come and the journey I yet to live out and complete. One thing I have done differently was balance work and living a full life or at least become more aware of the changes I need to make to achieve balance. I realize that some people are not as fortunate to have a close connection, a bond with their grandparents. I wish that everyone could experience it because it will remain with you for the rest of your life.
The relationship I had with my grandparents was the beginning of a legacy that I hope to pass down to future generations of our family. My grandparents will live on in perpetuity, as their descendants will hear great stories about the sacrifices, love, and support they had for their loved ones. Music, which once brought us together, is still a major part of our gatherings. Although our musical tastes are not the same, their unity in their love of particular music identifies each generation.
Sometimes the music is the background soundtrack to someone telling a great story of a memory of my grandparents. We get to relive their presence once again, even if it is only in our memories. A mental video of happier times when all seemed right in the world in the eyes of a young kid, with three sisters and grandparents who showered me with their love as soon as I jumped out of our wood-paneled, station wagon. I miss them every day but I smile at how they would be proud of their progeny.
Ruthi Davis is a the Founder of Ruth Davis Consulting LLC with over two decades of success in advertising/marketing, media/publicity, business development, client relations, and organizational optimization for a variety of clients. Ruthi is a proud mom and influencer in the parenting and family market as founder of the Superfly Supermom brand.
“Winter vacation” means different things to different families. Some want a beach getaway, some seek out a low-key, local place to relax together. Still others look for cultural experiences, outdoor activities or maybe some extreme water slide fun. No matter what your family looks for in a winter vacation we’ve got something for everyone here—with all of them less than three hours away from NYC. (A plane may be involved in some cases.) Go for a weekend, go for a week—one of these family winter vacation ideas near NYC will keep everyone totally chill this season.
To Chill in Style in The Hamptons: Gurney’s Montauk Resort & Seawater Spa
For a relaxing escape closer to home, try Gurney’s Montauk Gurney’s Montauk Resort & Seawater Spa the only resort in the Hamptons open year round, that happens to be located on prime oceanfront property. Choose from five dining options (from fancy to casual), take a dip in the ocean-fed indoor seawater pool, and sign the kids up for cooking baking at the Kid’s Club (while you sweat it out in the sauna or grab a massage). For indoor fun, check out the Children’s Museum of the East End in Bridgehampton. Don’t miss the chance to hang out in an igloo with an ocean view. Book a two-hour slot to snack and sip in one of these transparent geodesic domes, each of which is done up in a fun and festive theme including Santa’s Workshop, cozy Log Cabin, Roaring 20's, Astrology and Après Ski. Heads up: A Harry Potter-themed igloo is coming after the New Year. (P.S. the Gurney’s Kid’s Club is running special holiday activities from December 23-28 if you’re looking for a short escape stat.)
Gurney’s Montauk Resort & Seawater Spa 290 Old Montauk Highway Montauk, NY 631-668-2345 Online: gurneysresorts.com
For Festive Fun in the Sun: Baha Mar
Baha Mar
A tropical escape that feels farther away than it is (the flight in under three hours from NYC), Bahamian resort Baha Mar pulls out all the stops for the holiday season. It’s called “Festive" here, and happening include an original “glice-skating show” (faux ice that can take the heat), junkanoo (holiday) dancing and parades, family cooking classes and jam-packed activities at the resort’s Explorers Club for kids. (For a look at all the Festive events at Baha Mar, click here .) The holiday happenings go all the way until January 5, but Baha Mar is a great option past that, with Explorer’s Club fun year-round, cool pools for kids, complimentary beach floats, boats and equipment, and an on-site nature sanctuary with up-close-and-personal encounters with flamingos, stingrays, sea turtles and others. Read our full review here!
We recommended Quebec City as a fun, year-round family vacation spot this fall, and we’re back to remind you that this Canadian town embraces winter with style and gusto. (Case in point, the city's Winter Festival, which runs February 7 -16 this year, and is one of the biggest seasonal celebrations of iots kind in the world!) The already beautiful city is stunning in snow, and there are both indoor and outdoor activities to keep you and the kids busy. Get a thrill on the ice slide at Terrace Dufferin, or head to a nearby park for skiing. For a unique experience, check out the area’s ice hotel, where you can grab a hot cocoa or stay the night if you’re feeling adventurous. Indoor fun includes the Museum of Civilization (which includes a fun make believe dress-up exhibit); the Musée National des beaux-arts du Québec, where there’s a dedicated Family Gallery and kids under 12 get in free, and the Quebec Aquarium, located 15 minutes from downtown. For Quebec's answer to the Mall of America, head to Mega Parc, an 18-attraction amusement center inside shopping Mall Galeries de la Capitale. Quebec City is a great place to eat in the winter—enjoy fondue, hearty dishes of comfort food, and all kinds of real maple syrup treats. We recommend La Buche or “the log” where the menu includes pork ribs, shepherd’s pie, poutine with a topping of the day and more, in a cozy, wood-filled dining room meant to recall Canadian sugar shacks. There's a special kids' menu here, complete with games and puzzles. And, you can't visit Quebec City without taking in the magical Fairmont Le Château Frontenac, the late-nineteenth century beauty in Old Quebec that anchors the city. (Grab a table at eatery Bistro Le Sam while you're there and take in the views of the St. Lawrence and Terrace Dufferin.)
A perennial favorite, this Poconos indoor water park recently wrapped up a major upgrade and renovation—the most extensive since its debut in 2005. Improvements include an overhaul of all guest rooms, new attractions (such as the interactive mining experience, "Oliver's Mining Company") and fresh food and drink options.
The indoor water park provides over 80,000 square-feet of fun, including both extreme slides and mellow slides, chutes, a wave pool, water fort tree house and hot springs. When everyone's worn out by all that swimming and sliding, there's a bowling alley just for toddlers plus story times, rope courses, and game centers. Other diversions: PJ parties, dance parties, and character breakfasts, as well as dry play "Paw Passes" for an extra fee, which include a MagicQuest game, a Creation Station (make-your-own-stuffie), glitter tattoos, and more. To call this place cozy and kid-friendly is an understatement—jammies in the lodge-like lobby are allowed and enouraged—for everyone!
For the ultimate in indulgence, unwind with your little one at the ice-cream-themed spa, designed especially for kids. Decked out in a tiara and candy pink robe, the princess in your life can enjoy a flavored manicure and pedicure with a sherbet scrub. Then escape to the lodge’s Element Spa Salon for some much needed R&R and time for yourself! Win, win.
Driving time from NYC: 2 hours
1 Great Wolf Drive Scotrun, PA 570-688-9899 Online: greatwolf.com
For an Immersive Ski Experience: Belleayre Mountain Ski Center, New York
Sure, there are tons of slopes in the Tristate area, but Belleayre Mountain’s Kidscamp teaches little ones ages 4 to 12 how to ski or snowboard in a no-pressure group setting (kids 4 to 6 $102, 7 to 12 $112). The camp includes four hours of lessons, rentals, a lift ticket, and a filling lunch. Need to brush up on your slope stylings? Lessons for adults—group or private—are available as well. Once everyone is up to speed, there are 50 trails to choose from, as well as a terrain park, and six miles of cross-country skiing trails. If making the trek back to the city seems like too daunting of a task after such an action-packed day, there are Ski and Stay packages available for nearby lodging.
Driving time from NYC: 2.5 hours
181 Galli Curci Rd. Highmount, Ny 845-254-5600 Online: belleayre.com
For a Swim & Snow Combo
Kartrite Waterpark & Resort
Can't decide between hitting the slopes and catching a wave? You have options, and both are about a two-hour drive away.
If you'd rather head to the Catskills, the Kartrite Resort & Indoor Waterpark is a good place to land. The waterpark is brand new and the biggest indoor waterpark in New York State. Winter weather fun can be had at Holiday Mountain Ski and Fun Park in nearby Monticello, where there are seven slopes and you can ski and snowtube day and night. They also have a "magic carpet" to transport those new to skiing up the slope. While you're in the Catskills, keep an eye out for the Sullivan Catskills Dove Trail, a collection of 50 hand-painted dove sculptures that commemorates the 50th anniversary of the area's famous 1969 Woodstock Festival. Find the birds perched in villages and towns throughout the region.
The Kartrite Resort & Indoor Waterpark 555 Resort World Dr. Monticello, NY 845-397-2500 Online: thekartrite.com
Pennsylvania's Camelback Mountain just opened a new trail this year, the curvy "Basilisk", bringing its trail count to 39, the most in the state. Plus, they've upgraded their fleet of 377 snow guns, which now make more snow with less energy. The Pocono ski resort also has a serious snowtubing setup. Pair all that with Aquatopia, the giant indoor waterpark where it's always 84 degrees. Stay overnight at Camelback Lodge and the waterpark is included in your stay!
Camelback Resort Lodge and Aquatopia Indoor Water Park 301 Resort Dr. Tannersville, Pa 570-629-1661 Online: camelbackresort.com
For a Trip Back in Time: Mystic Seaport, Connecticut
If you're going to leave the city, why not go all out and leave this century, too? The Mystic Seaport Museum allows you to step back in time to a recreated 19th century seafaring village and a working shipyard in this quaint seaport town. You and your little sailors can climb aboard and explore historic wooden vessels dating all the way back to 1841. At the Children's Museum designed for kids seven and under, visitors can experience the life of a sailor. Show your little seafarers what real chores are by having them swab the decks, move cargo, cook in the galley, and sleep in sailor bunks. Additional family activities are offered seasonally.
Then head over to the Mystic Aquarium to see African penguins, beluga whales, sea lions and seals, dazzling tropical fish, and more. Then crash at the nearby Hyatt Place featuring new, regionally-inspired breakfast menus and rooms with separate living and sleeping areas so parents can have some alone time after the little ones finally fall asleep.
A true getaway awaits in the City of Brotherly Love. That’s because you’ll get everything here—culture, history, Greenwich Village-like shops, boutique hotels and a burgeoning food scene. And, yes, you could spend your entire time at tourist spots like the Liberty Bell, Betsy Ross House, the Benjamin Franklin Museum and Independence Hall, but that’s just the one facet of this awesome city to our south.
A favorite destination for kids seven and younger is the Centennial District's Please Touch Museum, which (you guessed it) encouraged kids to explore, learn, and play with interactive exhibits. Stop by and meet the mascot Squiggles, and then check out the Cents & Sensibility Fun with Money exhibit—its first new permanent exhibit in a decade—all about spending, saving and counting cash. Don't miss the "End of the Day Parade" that closes out every day at the museum, and unlimited carousel rides for $5!
No trip to Philly is quite complete without eating a cheesesteak—the overstuffed local faves ‘wit’ onions and Cheez Whiz at Pat’s King of Steaks are a great place to start—and then you’ve got to watch as your kids run the 72 steps brought to life in the Rocky films right outside the Philadelphia Museum of Art.
P.S.: There's a LEGOLAND Discovery Center about 45 minutes from Philly center is that's your kid's thing.
Driving time: 2 hours
Please Touch Museum Tickets: $19/adults and kids one and older; free/kids under one year old 4231 Avenue of the Republic of Philadelphia 215-581-3181 Online: pleasetouchmuseum.org
To Go Spelunking: Howe Caverns
Howe Caverns
Stay warm exploring the underground attractions at the stunning Howe Caverns. Here, visitors go 156 feet underground for an adventure through a six-million-year-old cave. The Flashlight Tour is a favorite with families: Kids are given souvenir helmets and headlamps and get to travel through a living limestone cave, which finishes with a boat ride on an underground river. The Howe Caverns Motel on the estate has rooms and once you've graduated as a pro spelunker, there's plenty more entertainment above ground including zip wires, climbing, rope courses, and bungie fun.
Driving time from NYC: 3 hours
255 Discovery Drive Howes Cave, New York 518-296-8900 Online: www.howecaverns.com
For Amazing Art in the Berkshires: Mass MoCA
Mimi O'Connor
For cultural enrichment and cool digs, consider a trip top Mass MoCA in North Adams, Massachusetts. The massive contemporary art center is home to 250,000 square feet of open gallery space filled with thought-provoking and often large-scale works of art. (The center houses several works by light artist James Turrell, and its three floors of Sol Lewitt galleries are impressive. Also: don't miss the Laurie Anderson VR experiences, which you need to sign up for in advance.) Mass MoCA also has a Kidspace with rotating exhibits and programming, allowing kids to get in on the art-making action. Lots of performing arts events such as concerts, film fests, and talks happen here, too, as well as free days; check the calendar to see what's on tap.
A new arrival to the area, The Williams Inn in nearby WIlliamstown, Mass is a good choice for a relaxed yet refined stay, with the added bonus of elevated comfort food on site at the property's restaurant and bar, The Barn. More traditional art can be found right in town at the newly-reopened Clark Institute and the Williams College Museum of Art.
Another option is The Porches, a Berkshires boutique inn with retro-industrial architecture and modern comforts located right across the street from the Mass MoCA. The revamped mill workers' homes are connected by (you guessed it) porches, and have all the comforts of home as well as an all-season pool with a heated deck, hot tubs, saunas and a fire-pit for s'mores.
Further afield in the area, but perhaps worth a trip isThe Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art in Amherst (about 90 minutes away). Dedicated to the author and illustrator of The Very Hungry Caterpillar, this art center has three galleries, a hands-on studio, films, lectures and live theatre running in the auditorium and a library full of favorites.
Driving time from NYC: three hours
Mass MoCA 1040 Mass MoCA Way North Adams, MA 413-662-2111 Online: massmoca.org
The Williams Inn 101 Spring St. 413-458-9371 Williamstown, MA 01267
The Porches 231 River St. North Adams, MA 413-664-0400 Online: porches.com
For a Taste of the Sweet Life: Hershey Lodge, Pennsylvania
Hershey Lodge
Oh, chocolate. This #1 favorite treat has its headquarters in Hershey and, while many families only think to visit Hershey in the warmer months (when it’s not just open on weekends), Hershey Lodge, which is part of Hersheypark, is our idea of a perfect winter getaway. Here, kids can catch a sugar rush at Hershey’s Chocolate World, where they get to see, smell, and of course taste chocolate before heading into the kitchen to create their own custom candy bar. Then at the hotel, which features an indoor water park, kids get to feel like grownups when they check in at the kids’ concierge—before enjoying a game of Chocolate Bingo, of course.
Driving time from NYC: 3 hours
325 University Drive Hershey, PA 844-330-1802 Online: hersheylodge.com
For a Breath of Fresh Air: Mohonk Mountain House, New York
While kids will get a kick out of Mohonk’s uncanny resemblance to a castle, adults will be impressed with the fact that five U.S. Presidents have stayed here since it opened its doors in 1869. Perched by a mountain lake and surrounded by acres of nature, little ones and grown-ups alike will instantly relax and sigh with relief at the beauty and openness the area has to offer. Of course, if exploring and wandering around aimlessly for hours on end isn’t your family’s thing, there’s also skiing, snowshoeing, tubing, and ice skating. And making your life easier, two to three meals and most activities are included in the cost of an overnight stay.
Driving time from NYC: 2 hours
1000 Mountain Rest Rd. New Paltz, NY 855-883-3789 Online: mohonk.com
For LEGOs and Luxury: Legoland Discovery Center and The Ritz-Carlton New York, Westchester
Something for them, something for you: Head just 30 minutes from Manhattan to Westchester, where the kids can get their brick on at Legoland Discovery Center and you can relax in style at the Ritz-Carlton. The hotel—about a 20 minute drive from Legoland—offers a variety of five-star services and amenities, and most importantly, an indoor rooftop pool. Another fun feature for budding young cooks: Junior Chefs Academy, where on certain dates (as posted online) kids ages 11 to 18 can participate in a series of seasonal baking workshops with Ritz-Carlton pastry chefs. An added plus: Classes take place in the hotel’s pastry kitchen and kids will learn everything from kitchen safety to technique.
Driving time from NYC: 30 minutes
Legoland Discovery Center Tickets: Starting at $15.95/person; free/kids under 2 years old) 39 Fitzgerald St. Yonkers, Ny Online: legolanddiscoverycenter.com
3 Renaissance Square White Plains, NY 914-946-5500 Online: ritzcarlton.com
For Horsing Around: Rocking Horse Ranch Resort, New York
Giddy up to this all-inclusive dude ranch. Junior wranglers can visit the resort’s pony ride area while kids 7 and up can take part in the year-round trail-riding program. There’s so much to do on this 500-acre spread in the heart of the scenic Hudson River Valley so, if you'd rather a professional take the reins, there are horse-drawn sleigh rides, and for those who prefer two legs over four, ski lessons and ice skating—or put your feet up entirely with some tubing action. (There is also an indoor water park at Rocking Horse if you want to swim and slide.) A favorite spot at the resort is the fun barn, decked out with climbing walls, a bounce structure, and air-powered Nerf Cannons. After a full day of fun, the evenings are packed with entertainment from jugglers, magicians, Wild West shows, and circus acts. It’s ideal for cooped-up kiddos looking to get the wiggles out.
For an Active Winter Mix: Skytop Lodge, Pennsylvania
Skytop Lodge
Skytop Lodge in Pennsylvania is another spot for active families wanting to get their winter on. Activities at the luxury resort include skiing (both downhill and cross-country), snowtubing, snowboarding, and snowshoeing, as well as ice skating, and even ice-fishing! (Many activities are for kids four and up.) Tackle the outdoors then unwind from it all with High Tea at 4 p.m. each day, then head to the indoor pool and spa for more chillaxing.
Driving time from NYC: 2 hours
1 Skytop Lodge Rd. Skytop, Pa 855-345-7759 Online: skytop.com
For Non-Stop Action: Woodloch Pines Resort, Pennsylvania
Woodloch Pines Resort
To say that Woodloch Pines Resort boasts an impressive roster of family-friendly activities would be an understatement. You and your little ones will be busy from morning ‘til night at this all-inclusive Poconos retreat. Anything from pony rides at the petting zoo to wiffle ball to family bake-offs to go-karting is at your disposal when you stay here. And of course, there’s an indoor pool if you’re not up for the winter sports available here. We’re talking endless trails for skiing, sledding and tubing. Sweetening the deal, Woodloch offers all-inclusive packages, and on certain days, kids even stay for free. The evening entertainment is packed with themed characters, jugglers, comedians, music and magic. Just make sure to make time for your own R&R at the spa down the road at The Lodge at Woodloch.
Driving time from NYC: 2.5 hours
731 Welcome Lake Rd. Hawley, Pennsylvania 570-685-8000 Online: woodloch.com
For a Sunny Escape to the South: Orlando, Florida
Mimi O'Connor
As we reported this fall, there's a lot happening in Orlando now: Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge is open and mind-blowing, there's a fantastic new Hagrid ride at Universal Studio's Florida Wizarding World of Harry Potter, and Toy Story Land is also pretty fresh. A quick escape to this sunny spot for families can be just the thing to shake those winter blahs away. Click here to see all our recs for where to stay, play and eat!
Here we are. In this life of raising littles. We can look at one another with the same weary smile and “get” what the other is feeling. We know the struggle between needing alone time and feeling guilty for taking it. We are all too familiar with the frustrations of our kids NOT getting the hang of potty training, and feeling teary-eyed at their newfound independence. We ask ourselves day after day amidst the sweeping, wiping, and PB&J-making if we nurtured their little hearts. Did we model Jesus to them?
Still, there you are with your growing pregnant belly, asking me how in the world I do it with three? (I may not be expecting, but trust me, I still wonder how those other moms do it with 4 or 5!) I just have to say that you will. You totally will. And dare I say that it will be easier for you than it was when you only had one.
I mean, you have already made it through the toddler years with one of them. You are pretty much smack dab in the middle of them again with your second. You have mastered multitasking. You know that you can’t leave home without snacks and extra clothes. You already know which sippy cups leak all over the place and which two brands are even worth the cash. You know what to do for crying, gas, teething, sleep regressions, growth spurts, etc. You know that a pacifier right after birth is NOT the end of the world and that your newborn’s heartbeat is actually supposed to be super fast. You can function throughout the day on little sleep with coffee, naptime, and Little Einsteins.
I think what I am trying to say is logistically three littles might be harder, but you are also better.
The past five years do count for something you know. Remember how you made it through things like NICU stays, colic, moving, living far away from family, nursing, sickness while raising your family, loss, travel, preschool, and potty training? Just to name a few. Plus, how many doubts, fears, and insecurities have you already overcome as a mother and woman? The things that you used to be so unsure about, or had caused you unnecessary stress, or made you question yourself or your capabilities as a mother that now hardly cross your mind. Those changes are huge.
You are no longer navigating the newborn and new mother stage at the same time. You will be welcoming a new little life into a family that has grown up together. You will get to mother this new babe as a mother who has already overcome, experienced and learned so much. You’ll pay closer attention to the fleeting moments, and worry less about the to-do list.
You will figure out how it works best to make trips with three instead of two. You will learn how to give your older two the attention and love they need while attending to the needs of a new baby. You will “get it all done” because it is just what you do. Even if you don’t realize it, it is what you already do every single day.
So that’s it, friend. You are better at doing what you already do. That’s how you will do it when baby three comes along.
My only advice is to definitely drop the guilt about taking some time for yourself.
Our family moved from the Chicago subrubs to rural Western Michigan to pursure our dream of homesteading. We're learning together as we homeschool our three daughters. I am passionate about thriving despite autoimmune disease, and encouraging other mamas. I serve on the editorial team at www.kindreddmom.com and write at www.choosinggraceblog.com
When you’re in the workforce in a traditional 9-5 job, it’s a law that when you work a certain amount of hours, you must get a break. Why? Mostly because employers and lawmakers realize that if employees work without a break they will burn out. It’s a common saying that moms have the hardest jobs but they don’t get paid. However, just because we don’t get paid, it doesn’t mean we can’t take breaks every now and then.
For all of you moms who may feel a bit guilty for needing or wanting a break, let me offer you a small piece of encouragement. As the wonderful mom you are, you put a lot of time, energy, money, and love into your children. And that’s great. However, you will be even more effective as a parent when you are well taken care of—mentally, physically, and emotionally. I’m not saying you have to go on this week-long vacation (I mean if you can do that, by all means, please take me with you) but I am saying that it will be of great benefit to both you and your children if you take a little time for yourself.
Hopefully that eased your guilt but if you’re thinking you don’t know what to do, I have some free or inexpensive suggestions:
1. Just get out of the house. If you’re like me and you have little ones that you homeschool you probably spend a great deal of your time in the house. A few weeks ago I said to my husband “tomorrow when you come home, I need to get out of here!” I went to our local Barnes & Noble and looked through magazines. Just that hour and a half refreshed me. It was awesome.
2. Grab a friend and your favorite guilty pleasure. Hey listen, a good adult conversation over a cupcake and cappuccino never hurt anybody. Enough said!
3. Get a manicure or pedicure. For me, I’ll always opt for a pedicure (just because manicures don’t last long on me) but either way, make this small investment for yourself. It’s a small detail that will make a big difference. And if the budget doesn’t allow you to do this, DIY it.
4. Take a walk. This is one of the best free breaks anyone can take. Literally, you hit all three areas of needed refreshment on this one—mental, physical and emotional. A nice walk will give you time to think, time to process and your heart will be pumping all along.
5. Start a hobby. Sign up for a local class, hobby or sport that is of interest to you. This will ensure that you don’t completely abandon your interests and you may meet a new friend or two.
Remember mama, you are a vital part of your family. You’re more than just a worker, you are a life-giver and source of inspiration. So treat yourself and give yourself a break.
Hi Everyone. I’m Amber. I’m a wife and mom of 2 beautiful princesses. I was born a creative and I’m learning to find creativity in every area of my life. I’m a lover of all things beautiful but I’m also drawn to the broken because there’s always room for restoration.
We’re all learning here…and I every intention to turn my challenges into lessons and allow them to support others (usually when we feel the least supported). I’m still new at this whole mom thing. So far, I’ve learned a lot, and there are few things I want to pass on to new moms (or not so new moms) as you travel on this journey of parenthood.
1. You’re new at this, too.
You grow and change as a mother just as much as your children do. When they are born, they are new to the world, and you are new as a parent. You will learn tough lessons and hard lessons and fun lessons and your kids will teach you a lot about yourself. It’s ok, especially in the early days, and with your first child, to realize, “Hey, I’m new at this too, and we will figure this out together” (as a family). I believe, your child chose you as a parent, and the most important thing you are doing is trust each other and trust yourself.
2. More sacrifice does not always make you a better parent.
I’ve noticed a trend with many mothers over the last few decades in which mothers tend to exhaust themselves like they feel the need to prove their love and devotion to their children to everyone and everything. Yes, I get it, all parents make sacrifices for their children. There are a lot of things I miss from my life before motherhood. But what I won’t sacrifice is my marriage, my own health, my hygiene or my life ambitions. My goals and plans may require a different route to get to and the timing may not happen the way I always thought, but I’m still on track. You cannot be the most present, focused, healthy, attentive, creative, loving and grateful parent you are capable of being when you are run down and resentful.
3. Take care of your body.
(This is why I work with clients for at least three to six months because overall balance, health, and wellness are all-encompassing and typically one area greatly affects another.) Listen to your body. Feed it nourishing foods. Sleep. Shower. Use quality products on your skin. Rest. Move your body. Sleep. Pay attention to what makes you not feel well. Have sex. Hug. Keep your surroundings healthy too. Cut back on “that which no longer serves you,” like wine, sugar and caffeine.
4. Take care of your mind.
Be kind to yourself. Something that always resonates highly with me when I work with clients is taking yourself out of a current situation or conversation and looking at yourself, talking to yourself—as though you were a best friend, a sister, a client or a child—with such unconditional love and absence of judgment. When you talk to yourself, have you heard yourself lately? Practice forgiveness, read, journal, meditate. This may not be something we can all spend hours on every day or even week. But coming back down to earth and tuning into our hearts and minds can reveal incredible lessons and really improve our communication and interactions with others (like our children and spouses).
5. This too shall pass… or evolve.
What you’re going through, right now, will change. When your child is a newborn, it’s easy to think that life may always be this hard, that you’ll never, ever, catch up on sleep again. It’s easy to think you’ll never fit into your old jeans, or you may not ever want to have sex again. When your child is 2, you may wonder if you’ll ever want to have another baby, if you’ll ever have the time for yourself that you once had (probably not). Will my child always tantrum like this? Will he ever eat more than yogurt, goldfish crackers and blueberries? For every stage of childhood development, there is a stage of parenthood development. And this season will be nothing like the next. Enjoy the journey and really work on taking in each day and each stage, because you will not go back to this again. Even if you have another baby, it will look completely different the next time around.
It’s so important that we trust ourselves as parents. I’ve found that trusting and owning what’s best for me, my home and our family makes all the difference in how I feel about myself and less worrying about what everybody else thinks.
Nicole L. Schmitz, helps others to improve their energy, digestion, sleep, nutrition, weight, and health conditions with simplified, cleaner eating, and better self-care. She is a mother, aspiring yogi, writer, and artist, loves living by the beach, and inspiring others to make clear and confident healthy lifestyle choices every day.
Family vacations are a great way to get away from the rush of modern life and reconnect with each other. The memories that come from fun-filled family vacations will last a lifetime, but sometimes their boredom and frustration can rear its ugly head. No one can be happy all the time, but with a little bit of planning, a lot of patience and these five tips, you can survive your family vacation with a wealth of happy memories.
#1. Plan Your Expenses
Money is one of the most stressful aspects of any family vacation. You should set a budget with your spouse and any other adults that will accompany on your trip well in advance. Find out who is contributing and in what amounts. You should also set what spending limits will be. Then, start saving at least three months before you plan to depart. Aside from your spending budget, you will need to set money aside for unexpected expenses such as medical cost, impulse purchases, gifts, and even inflation. This can keep everyone in the green out of the poorhouse during your family vacation. If you have kids that will be traveling with you, consider having them save their allowance for a few months. That way they can make their own “fun” or optional purchases while on vacation. Not only will this help keep you on budget, but they will also feel more involved in the planning process.
#2. Plan Your Travel Time & Know Your Limits
One of the hardest parts of going on vacation with your family is getting to your destination. Plan your travel time well in advance of your trip to stay on schedule. Can you imagine getting packed and ready only to miss your flight? How about setting a time to hit the road only to get mired in rush hour traffic due to departing from the house too late? Instead of getting stressed out, plan properly. For every child in your vacation party, add an extra 20 minutes to your departure time. For every slow-moving adult or elderly person, add 15 minutes. Once you have the extra time calculated, set your departure ahead accordingly to stay on schedule and retain your sanity. It is also critical to know your limits and that of those traveling with you. Everyone has those little things that can cause a major meltdown, keep them in mind when planning your trip. Every so often you may have to just let the baby cry or allow your spouse to pick the radio station on to keep the peace. Choosing your battles not only will ensure your trip goes smoothly, but it will also keep everyone happy and your wits intact.
#3. Set Aside Time for Yourself
Taking a vacation with your family is a lot of fun for them, but it can also be a lot of work for you and your spouse. Creating me time allows your family to have independent fun while you get some time to yourselves. If your family has time away from you, they will begin to appreciate the time you are around them even more and you will also feel much more refreshed. Depending on the age of the people in your vacation party, downtime can mean any number of things. If you have other adults or older kids, consider letting them explore your vacation spot on their own. While everyone is away, you can kick up your feet, relax, and just let the strain of the trip melt away. You should never feel selfish or guilty for cherishing that time away from your family even on vacation. The role of a parent is one that changes often but seldom involves truly having no responsibility. Getting in your “me time” allows you to be the best parent that you can be for the rest of your vacation.
#4. Learn to Compromise
On a family vacation, you are going to be faced with various personalities outside of their usual environment. As a result, it is important to be flexible if you want things to go smoothly. Regardless of your destination, there is going to be several things to see and events to attend. That means there is going to be conflicts about what to do first or when to go to each event. Make a point of pairing up family members with similar interest if some activities occur at the same time that different groups don’t want to miss. This can cut down on arguments and make your vacation much more enjoyable for all since no one will be stuck doing something they have no interest in. Depending on the age of your family members, some may need to sleep earlier than others. Consider taking turns going to bed early so that every night owl can have a chance to party hard all night long.
#5. Pay Attention to Family, Not Electronics
One of the main reasons to go on vacation with your family is to get away from the real world and reconnect. That is hard to do if you spend your whole trip glued to your phone, tablet or laptop. Social media and work tend to be able to reach out and touch us whenever and wherever we may be and that has to stop. Be present with your family to make memories and enjoy your time together. We are not saying to leave your electronics at home but make a point not to use them until the end of each day. Laugh, joke, and immerse yourself in the moment to get the most out of your family vacation. You may be surprised at just how much you learn about your family and how much you actually don’t miss staying connected.
The Bottom Line: Traveling can be fun though traveling with your family can be a challenge. By following our handy suggestions, you will find that your vacation flows much more smoothly and your sanity will remain intact.
Mollie Wilson is a freelance writer from North Carolina. When she is not writing, she is perusing an adventures life- backpacking, climbing, exploring local coffee shops, and traveling.
