Congrats to Brooklyn Nine-Nine’s Melissa Fumero and her husband, David! The actress recently announced the pair are expecting their second child.

Fumero took to Instagram over the weekend, posting a baby bump pic and telling the world, “Oh yeah, I’m hella pregnant.”

The actress shared that her second pregnancy isn’t exactly the easiest one, writing, “To be honest, I haven’t felt like posting about it because this pregnancy has been way harder and… I don’t feel that cute?” Fumero continued, “But yesterday I got a really intense massage, an awesome chiropractic adjustment, and my hair feels thicker… so I feel a little bit cute today.”

New dad-to-be David commented on his wife’s post, joking, “Wait…WHAT?!” The couple, who haven’t announced a due date, already have a two-year-old son.

—Erica Loop

Featured photo: Melisa Fumero via Instargam

 

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It’s a digital world, and our newfound interconnectedness has opened up new possibilities for gaming and even gambling online. Today, it’s possible to win millions of dollars playing in video game tournaments or in online poker. For the vast majority of gamers, however, gaming is simply a hobby—but a hobby that can take up a lot of time.

Estimates from the Entertainment Software Association show that about 164 million adults in the United States play games. While some hobby gamers only log on a couple of hours a week, others spend several hours a day playing their favorite games. As life goes on, many hard-core amateur gamers are forced to wrestle with balancing their favorite hobby with adulting, especially when parenting enters the picture.

If you’re a new or soon-to-be parent, it’s important to think about how to balance your game time while taking care of your baby. Here’s what you need to know about video gaming and managing your daily responsibilities.

Set Good Examples: Video games are often demonized in the media as making kids more violent or hindering their ability to succeed in school and in life. While it’s true that anything in excess can be harmful, the surprising truth is that a mere 30% of gamers are under the age of 18.

Most people who play video games are adults. Still, it’s important to set a good example for your child and limit the amount of time you spend playing video games. Even very young children are sponges for information, and they’ll learn their habits and set their expectations of the world based on your behavior.

With that in mind, remember to “eat your vegetables” and prioritize other responsibilities. You don’t have to cut out gaming entirely—it’s all about finding balance.

Establish Boundaries: As a parent, you need to establish firm boundaries for your kids and enforce them. If you’re struggling to manage your parental duties with playing games, then you may need to set some boundaries for yourself to ensure that you’re not neglecting time with your child or partner.

The first thing to do is discuss the issue with your partner or co-parent. Setting these expectations will help keep you on track and prevent resentment from coming up later. You should discuss when, where, and for how long you’ll be able to play video games. Maybe that means a set number of hours per week you can play per day or times of the day that are off-limits due to family time.

Setting these boundaries for yourself can be difficult, which is why it can be helpful to get some external accountability. Always remember why you’re taking these steps—to be there for your family.

Strike a Balance Between Game Time and Baby Time: At this point, we all know that too much “screen time” isn’t good for kids. Very young children under the age of 18 months shouldn’t be given any screen time at all, and toddlers shouldn’t have more than an hour or so per day. As children grow, their screen time should be adjusted based on their maturity, responsibilities, and other factors.

As an adult, you’re in charge of your own screen time. But you should be conscious of the consequences of too much screen time and make an effort to balance your gaming with your parental duties. While everyone’s lifest‌yle is different, experts recommend keeping gaming to two hours or less per day. Your child comes first, and it’s important to put their needs ahead of your gaming.

Change Your Lifestyle: Soon-to-be parents have a lot to think about when preparing to bring a new bundle of joy into the world. It’s a huge adjustment that involves many sacrifices and lifest‌yle changes during the child’s early years. As kids grow and become more independent, parents can take more time for themselves once again.

How will your gaming affect your parenting? That’s not very clear yet. The jury’s still out on the effects that a generation of gaming will have on parenting outcomes. In the meantime, though, it’s important to remember what’s important—your family.

Gaming can be a great stress-reliever, but it can also take up a lot of time and distract you from caring for your new baby. When you have a newborn, you may need to cut way back on your gaming. As your kids get older, though, you may be able to spend time with them by teaching them your favorite games. It’s all about finding the balance that works for your family.

Sarah Daren has been a consultant for startups in industries including health and wellness, wearable technology, and education. She implements her health knowledge into every aspect of her life, including her position as a yoga instructor and raising her children. Sarah enjoys watching baseball and reading on the beach. 

Actress and new mom, Danielle Fishel recently talked to People magazine about motherhood, her 10-week-old son Adler’s early birth, and the newborn’s time in the NICU.

According to Fishel, Adler’s unexpected hospital stay was due to a fluid build-up in his lungs. The newborn was rushed to Children’s Hospital Los Angeles when his lungs didn’t heal themselves. The new mama told People, “Adler is bottle-fed because of the issue that he had, something called chylothorax. It’s a leak in the lymphatic system.”

After 12 days in the hospital, Fishel (and husband Jensen Karp) got news no parent wants, “To hear, ‘We have bad news: The fluid has tripled, and now we no longer think we’re the best place for him. This feels much more like an emergency and we need to rush him to Children’s Hospital,’ was extremely scary.”

While in the hospital doctors told the new parents that they would need to tap Adler’s lungs to drain the fluid. Luckily, the newborn’s lungs started to heal and he didn’t need the surgical procedure.

Fishel went on to explain, “Unfortunately, my breast milk was creating fluid in his lungs, and we had to take him off of breast milk and put him on a specially formulated formula that doesn’t use the lymphatic system.”

At three weeks old, baby Adler was finally healthy enough to go home with his parents. Karp told People, “For every first-time parent, it’s an adjustment to know it wasn’t ideal, but he’s healthy and he’s going to make it. We have the best doctors around us, etc. Those are the things you kind of ease into.”

—Erica Loop

Featured photo: Danielle Fishel via Instagram 

 

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School is about to start and I have been talking to many of my fellow Mommy friends, seeing their cute photos on Facebook and Instagram and it seems that we are all doing the same thing, that same hilarious race to get it all done before school begins. We are squeezing every last drop out of summer and preparing (best we can) for our littles to start their school year right. (And if you haven’t started the frantic rush yet, feel free use my little list here as you mental to-do before school starts.)

1. Backpacks, Lunchboxes: The Pottery Barn catalog strategically lands in our mailbox exactly after the 4th of July. Try and resist personalizing everything from backpacks to lunchboxes.

2. Haircuts: We learned from last year. We waited until the weekend before school started and couldn’t get an appointment anywhere. My oldest started kindergarten without his fresh cut. Not this year! My husband took them last weekend. Check!

3. Completing the Summer Bucketlist: Did you make one too? Do you still have like 8 things on there? We are rushing to squeeze it all in now. One more library trip, Take them to the zoo, make that recipe, catch lightning bugs.

4. New School Shoes: I had exactly one free hour with the kids today. We stopped at Carnival Shoe Store for Nikes and to take advantage of their BOGO. They raced up and down the aisles and don’t you know it, they found the FASTEST shoes in the store!

5. School Supplies: This list has been available since May? Say What? Yet here we are, adding that on to our to-do list the week before school starts. Tissues, pencils, scissors, folders and so on.

6. School Clothes Shopping: They will be wearing their summer shorts and tees for at least for another two months but somehow we feel compelled to pick up a few new items for that first day of school pic.

7. Get the Chalkboard Ready: Some Moms are so prepared for that infamous First Day of school shot, they have ordered these pre-printed online or made their chalkboard with their current age, the date, and their teacher’s name. Good for you mammas!

8. What Teacher Do They Have? Here we go, finally the chance to look online, or posted on the school door immediately as it is available. And then what do we do? Text one another or post to Facebook to figure out who is in who’s class. “Mrs. G? Yeah, we had her last year and loved her! Those poor teachers, I think. We can’t help it. We are excited too! Of course, we love them all and I honestly think that if they are teaching at this school, they have to be amazing.

9. Earlier Bedtimes: Have your kids been up until 9, 10 p.m. this summer? Have they had a bedtime? Is it really necessary in the summer? We feel compelled to prepare them for the early to bed and early to rise routine so that they (literally) don’t miss the bus.

10. Hug and Kiss Them More: They have grown almost a foot it seems, added a few more freckles, have a few cuts and scrapes from their bikes, and we made a million memories and yet we all think the same, how has summer passed us by already?

Whether you have a month or a week or just a day until school starts, enjoy the last moments before the big change and adjustment that is before us and the mad rush of the beginning of school. All too soon we will be meeting new teachers, filling out all the papers and forms, doing homework and they will be meeting new friends. In all of the craziness that comes with this, take a deep breath and enjoy this time too.

This post originally appeared on Life, Love & Little Boys.

Located in Bloomington, Indiana I am a wife, full-time working Mom to 3 boys, a part-time graduate student & a writer. I am also an optimist, problem solver, peacemaker, gardener, runner and a crazy-busy mom just trying to enjoy each moment. I truly value my friends, family and my mommy tribe.

You’ve heard of prenups before marriage, but have you heard about the baby variety? Some couples are reportedly choosing to create before-birth contracts, outlining each partner’s responsibilities.

So what exactly is a baby prenup? Technically it’s not a “prenup” in the strictest of senses. A prenup, or pre-nuptial, agreement happens before a marriage, while a baby prenup is a cute name for a contract between two parents made prior to the baby’s birth.

photo: J Carter via Pexels 

The baby prenup clearly details what parenting duties each person is responsible for. If you’re wondering why two people would want this, think about the crazy confusion that typically follows a birth.

Who’s on diaper duty? Who’s washing baby’s zillion onesies? And who’s getting up at midnight, 2 a.m. and 5 a.m. to change baby’s crib sheets?

Going into parenting with a written agreement sets expectations, creates clarity and can make the initial adjustment easier for everyone involved. Vanessa Petronelli, a celeb spiritual and life coach, told Good Morning America, “While there will be many unexpected, unpredictable elements, it’s definitely wise to do as much planning as possible in terms of household and parenting tasks.”

Before you run to your lawyer for help, stop. Unlike the marriage variety, a baby prenup is more of an organizational/relationship saving strategy that parents tailor to their needs and less of an actual legal document.

—Erica Loop

 

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Three-day weekends are a usually a rarity but in one school district, they’re a permanent thing. As part of the largest school district in the United States, 27J Schools in Adams County, Colorado made the change to a four-day school schedule during the 2018-19 school year, to mixed reviews.

With the big change nearing the end of its first year, teachers, students and parents are reflecting back to determine if the experiment was a success. Did it work? The answers are showing a pretty big divide.

With 28 schools and about 18,000 students, 27J Schools in Adams County, Colorado had a lot of adjustment. Within the revised schedule, Mondays became part of the weekend by extending elementary school days by 40 minutes, while middle and high school schedules changed to longer eight-hour days.

The new schedule, which is set to continue for at least two more years, has seen an increase in promising teacher applicants and lower staff turnover. While teachers and students are loving the new schedule, parents are not is thrilled, as NBC News reports.

“I don’t like it one bit, and I feel like the district didn’t take seriously my worries about child care,” single mom of three Jessica Lore told NBC News. To help working parents, the district expanded its existing offerings to include an all-day daycare option on Monday for $30 per day as well as enlisting a Boys & Girls Club to provide all-day care for $20.

The real test will be when state testing results are revealed in the fall to determine the most important factor in this major change: the students’ academic success. We’ll be sure to fill you in on those results when they’re in!

—Shahrzad Warkentin

Featured photo: Pixabay via Pexels

 

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A couple years ago, I wrote a post called Adventures in Single Motherhood.  I had recently been divorced and I was crippled with insecurity and fear which had an immense effect on my sense of adventure.  Since my divorce, I have done some intense rebuilding.  A tearing down to the studs and starting over type of rebuilding.

I have read lots of books and done lots of work to undo the damage which was causing the insecurity and fear.  In my self-assessment, I discovered that the number one, most important thing in my life that brings me joy is adventure.  Aside from parenting, of course, but we’re talking about trying to reignite the spark within me and figure out what apart from being a mom makes me tick.

Two years ago, my family and I decided we were going to embark on an adventure to the UK to reconnect with our family’s roots.  We decided the summer of 2019 was the year we were going.  We hadn’t all been there together as a family since 1982, and I hadn’t been back myself since the early 90’s.

My daughter has been obsessed with London since she was about 4-years-old and when her best friend went two years ago, she lost her mind with jealousy.  This was going to be a special trip.

But when it came time to actually book everything, schedules, life and outside priorities got in the way, and one by one family members started dropping like dominos, until the last two pieces standing were my daughter and I.

I’m so much more confident than I was two years ago, when we lived in Phoenix and I didn’t have the guts to travel the four-hour drive to the Grand Canyon with my daughter by myself. But I wasn’t sure I could do a two-week stint in a foreign country alone with my 11-year-old.  I also knew opportunities for these types of adventures don’t come around often, and sometimes you need to seize the day!

I started to warm up to the idea of doing the trip alone – a special mother daughter trip.  When I told my daughter the family trip had fallen apart and it was just her and I left, she didn’t skip a beat when she asked, “Well, can we just go by ourselves, then?”  And I didn’t skip a beat when I replied, “Of course we can.”

Two days later our trip was booked.  She helped pick the hotels, we got our British Rail pass, {because why stop at visiting one country, let’s visit two} and we made a list of all the things we want to do while we’re there.  No pub crawls for mom, but it will still be the adventure of a lifetime!

The journey of single motherhood has been an interesting one to say the least.  It’s a difficult adjustment to make, going from life with a partner, back to life on your own, but with a little help, and a lot of self-love that has reignited the spark within me, we have settled into a groove.  We are ready for the next adventure!  Because the wanderlust never left, I just needed a reminder that the power was always within me.

Angela is a freelance writer/publicist.  She loves coffee and wine, and spends her days filling her 9 year-old daughter’s head with 1970’s and 80’s pop culture.  She has a rescue cat named Violet, as in Beauregarde, and don't play 80’s Trivial Pursuit with her, because she wins every time.

The bill can quickly add up when you’re shopping at Target, which means any chance to save some money is helpful. Now you can get a discount on Target.com just by making a small adjustment to the shipping.

As Business Insider reports, Target has been quietly testing out a new features online to save money and cut down on the number of shipments to customers. By agreeing to an order consolidation, you will earn $1 off your online purchase.

photo: Mike Mozart via Flickr

Consolidating orders allows Target to ship your items in as few boxes as possible. You might still end up with more than one box, depending on how the order is fulfilled, but the idea is to minimize shipments, which can benefit the environment. It also means it might take a little longer for your items to arrive, but if you’re not in a rush, you’ll earn a dollar and help reduce that carbon footprint.

“Guest response has shown that many guests prefer a reduced number of deliveries, and that speed is not the only factor in a great online shopping experience,” a Target spokeswoman told Digital Commerce 360.

For now the option is only available online and not through the Target app, but if all goes well chances are it will eventually roll out to all buying options.

—Shahrzad Warkentin

 

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I remember the fear that consumed me when I was pregnant with my second child. A relatively new mom to a toddler not yet two years old, I was just getting my groove in this motherhood journey.

I had read a lot of the books. I was starting to find a schedule that was manageable. My little boy was starting to really blossom: walking, first words, a growing personality… these were the days I’d been dreaming of for so long.

And amongst all these factors was an all-encompassing love that filled my whole heart. I never knew such love until I became a mama to this little miracle.

So where, exactly, would I make space in my heart for another living breathing human to enter? Because I believed with every cell in me that my heart was full. No vacancy. Not even a broom closet of space for another person.

Not to mention my brain, which was also at max capacity. It took me almost two years to read this little boy’s facial expressions, the color and texture of his poop, his different cries and now his gurgling jabber. I knew how long naps would last, how much food to make and how much soothing to calm a meltdown. I had it down to a science. How on earth could I keep these plates spinning when another child entered the picture. It all seemed so apocalyptic.

You would not believe what happened when my second child, another darling boy, entered my world. Beyond my greatest fears, my heart did not explode. Aside from my certainty the world would end, my love for my first child did not get moved, erased or compressed.

My heart simply grew.

It was the most natural adjustment in the world. One minute my heart was one size, the next minute—its size had doubled. All my worries were for nothing. My body, my heart and my love knew exactly how and when to shift and expand.

The parenting journey is an exciting, momentous, overwhelming time for first time mothers. And the heart is our strongest muscle for good reason… It will double in size with the birth of a sibling.

If only the brain would do the same. But I can assure you that you do learn to keep the plates spinning. You do learn to incorporate new facial expressions, new schedules, new bedtime routines. It’s a much slower process, guaranteed and a few plates will break in the adjustment. But while our heart is a mom’s strongest muscle, our brain is slightly slower to acclimate.

I’m pretty sure that’s where the expression “mom brain” was derived from. And it’s all par for the course on this motherhood journey.

Hi! I’m Celeste. I consider myself a relatively new mom with two boys ages 4 and 2. Other titles I go by include: wife, marketing guru, avid reader (self-help books are my favorite), writer, travel/adventure seeker and fitness nut.

Constance Hall, a mom blogger from Australia, is helping new moms with the depression that can come with such a huge life adjustment. In a viral Facebook post, Constance says she constantly getting messages from new mothers asking her for advice on getting over the depression hump. In response, Constance begs moms to “Socialize. Please.” She says that after 4 babies, 2 psychologists, 1 marriage counsellor, severe anxiety, 4 break ups and makes ups, that she’s learned that friends and socializing will make us feel “healed.”

So far, her post has received over 16,000 shares and 63,000 likes. Read her whole message to new mothers below.

All Photos: Constance Hall via Facebook

“To all of my Queens who have or are about to have a baby.
I get a lot of messages from miserable Queens after having babies.
It’s not easy to be in a depressing situation without getting depression.
So together I think we need to make parenthood less depressing.
Having had 4 babies, 2 psychologists, 1 marriage counsellor, severe anxiety, 4 break ups and makes ups… I am in the position to offer this advice.
Socialise. Please.
Above cleaning, above cooking, above everything.
Because face to face contact is free therapy, a laugh and a coffee or walk saved me, even on days that I did not want to, I followed my psychologists advice and forced myself to.
Placing a new 24 hour job between 2 parents is going to cause friction, it just is. When we get stressed we blame each other.
But the working parent is able to walk out the door and distract themselves, kick goals at work, have a chat and just generally feel like a normal human with a purpose, where as the at home parent is home is left to dwell on the argument and maximise everything that was said so by the time the worker comes home he is normal and wifey is a crazed lunatic who has packed her bags and is selling the house.
That’s not fair. It’s not fair that we get the word “depression” thrown at us when we don’t have the opportunity to heal in these four walls.
You deserve a life despite becoming a mum.
You have 2 huge responsibilities, keeping your baby safe and happy and taking care of your mental health. Everything else can wait.
If anyone questions that explain that socialising is your mental health plan, we all need a mental plan, parenthood should come with one.
Walk out that door and call a Queen, even if you barley know her. Talk openly, bitch about the dickhead you married, cry about your lack of sleep, laugh at the state of the house you just walked out of. Just do it. Stop cancelling on your friends, cancel everything else, not friends. You will feel healed. You might even love your partner more.

Remember Queens, parenthoods most vital tool is your happiness.”

Do  you agree? Tell us in the comments below!