ML Interest Tag: scenario

The Other Side of Fear: 5 Strategies for Living Like a Warrior

By Ruthi Davis

Dear Confessional,

Many times throughout my life, fear has tapped me on the shoulder when I least expected—it has also punched me in the gut and brought me to my knees in a whirl of exhausting and exasperating emotion. Fear is such a heavy, complicated, and often unexpected emotion that comes in many forms, but certainly not limited to the following:

Fear of failure Fear of disappointment Fear of rejection Fear of threat/harm Fear of overall lack of control over a situation or outcome

Personally, I can tell you that at this stage in my life, I prefer to live like a warrior and kick fear to the curb! I have honestly had enough, and I hold nothing back in living, loving, learning, and propelling myself into the life that I choose and work toward living. That’s why I’m happy to share my top 5 strategies for overcoming fear and living like a warrior.

1. Alter Your Mindset

“Your Perception is Your Reality.”

The only thing that separates you from fear is your mindset. While fear is an important, natural emotion, it’s also a stifling dream-crusher that will stop you in your tracks and have you running in the opposite direction.

Your mindset determines your self-worth and confidence, your action and inaction, your next step vs. the status quo, how you approach the world, and the spectacles in which you choose to view your circumstance.

Whether you choose to see the glass as half-full or half-empty, it’s still the same glass with the same amount of water. The manner in which you choose to see it is your personal choice that is typically followed by an emotion.

Were you lucky and proud to have a half cup of water when you were thirsty? Or are you angry and disappointed that you only have a half cup and not a drop more? 

If you simply refine your perception, you will then impact your personal experience. Alternately, if you prefer a different reality, then first change your perception.

How do you do this? Just be more positive in your speech, communication, and response to experiences in your daily life. Stop crumbling when things don’t work out as planned. Instead, learn to laugh, release, and rejoice in not having experienced a worse case scenario. In this sense, happiness is a choice. I choose to be happy.

What do you choose?

2.  Focus on Your Level of Control

Fear often stems from a lack of control. This feeling can grow and spread like a dark cloud, inward through emotion and then outward in behavior. No, we do not have control over everyone and everything, but we DO have control over ourselves and our choices to prepare, plan, and respond to any situation.

Instead of fixating on your lack of control, refocus your vision on those areas that are within your control. Learn to fully identify and manage all of the choices you can make within a scenario. Take control of your situation by owning your options. First be honest with yourself and come face-to-face with your situational anxieties, then create a mental list of your options and make a plan.

Take your abstract feelings and acknowledge them, understand where they came from, and break it down into tangible and manageable next steps—that is when fear will lose its power over you.

Can you think of a fear that continues making unwanted visits?

3. Just Say NO to “What If”

The “What If” game is a never-ending mental ping-pong of disaster. Stop doing it. The ONLY time that this game is even remotely acceptable is when you are trying to prepare for an event or occasion and are making sure that you have everything you need (i.e., packing a baby bag, planning for a meeting or presentation, or preparing for a trip). Otherwise, STOP doing it!

4. Goal Setting & Getting

When your parents and/or teacher told you that you could do/be anything you truly wanted if you work hard enough—they really weren’t kidding. You really can. The only thing between you and your dream becoming your reality are these 5 strategies, that’s it.

Stop letting time slip past you and “seize the moment!” It’s never too late, even if you start simply and keep a comfortable pace. The first step is to draw a mind map—make a circle in the middle of a paper with your true soul-itching vision, add branches from this center with greater detail about your vision for that goal, and then create simple steps for each branch. Lastly, make a comfortable and manageable to-do list for the day—and actually do it.

Most of us look up at a mountainous goal, and before we even try, fear steps in to overwhelm, worry, and laugh in our face until our dream dissolves. Instead, keep your ultimate goal in mind but keep your eyes focused only on one small step at a time for a minimal investment. Before you know it, you will be at the top. While obstacles and even avalanches may take place, it’s how you choose to navigate through each moment that will propel you.

What would you write in the center of your mind map?

5. Organization is NOT only for Type A’s

You don’t have to be a Type A personality to have solid organizational skills. All you need is true determination and passion to get you there. I personally don’t like stress, so I choose to rise above it by preparing ahead of time. Whether I’m making a to-do list to remove responsibility out of my head and onto paper, or packing snacks, change of clothes, or emergency kit for the kids to bring in the car in case of any unexpected circumstances, I’ve got it covered.

Remember to be honest with yourself about the simplest of situations or details that create stress and fear of the “what if” scenarios coming true, and be prepared. Manage each of the areas that you can control.

You are worthy. You are important. You are loved.  You are capable. You are strong.  Your greatest ambition is waiting for you to make it happen.  You can do it!

“The only way to achieve the impossible is to believe it is possible.” —Alice Through The Looking Glass

with Love,

Ruthi

Ruthi Davis is a the Founder of Ruth Davis Consulting LLC with over two decades of success in advertising/marketing, media/publicity, business development, client relations, and organizational optimization for a variety of clients. Ruthi is a proud mom and influencer in the parenting and family market as founder of the Superfly Supermom brand.

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How to Make the Transition to Stepparent Easier on Kids

By Ruth Sharp

Imagine a scenario where you’ve had to tell your young children their mother died? Now, a couple of years later, you’re about to tell them that you’re re-marrying and they’ll soon have a new stepmom. How do you approach situations that you know are going to be difficult for everyone?

I’m not sure if this article is about marriage struggles or parenting struggles, but as we all know, one affects the other, especially in blended families. To give you some background, I was 40 years old when I married my husband (I hadn’t been married before nor did I have children of my own). At that time he was 43, a widower for two and a half years and had two children with his first wife. Ryan was nine years old and Engle was six when we got married.

After 14 years of marriage, this is what I’ve learned:

Before Getting Married:

  • Discuss parenting styles by role-playing every- day scenarios like putting kids to bed, chores to be done, expectations during the dinner hour, etc.
    • It used to take my husband 45 minutes to put his kids to bed before we got married. Not only did this cut into our time alone together but he was exhausted by the time they actually went to sleep. Then he had to go back and clean up the kitchen and get their backpacks ready for the next day. I suggested that we try putting them to bed separately, having them help us get their backpacks organized for the next day. The sooner you acknowledge differences in parenting styles, the sooner you can agree on compromises on how to handle normal routines.
  • Ask your partner if he/she has fully grieved the loss of their former spouse.
    • This is a delicate conversation, for sure, but many times parents are so preoccupied with just getting through the day that they don’t stop and really think about whether they’ve grieved or not. I believed my husband when he said that he had grieved his wife’s death, but the guilt he continued to feel for his children and their loss was still at the forefront of his emotions. This, in turn, affected how he parented.
  • Have a family discussion either before you get engaged or at the same time that you announce your engagement to the kids.
    • Give the kids an opportunity to ask questions so they can understand in what ways life is going to be different for them. I remember my stepdaughter asking whether her dad was going to still live in the house with her, or if he would move out and I would take over. This also sets up an expectation that things are going to be different, but there’s also a great opportunity for them to have a new family with new advantages. My stepson was reluctant to meet my side of the family but once he realized he had a whole new bunch of cousins to play with he didn’t mind at all!

Once You’re Married:

  • Ease into new routines.
    • Many times, as was the case for my six-year-old stepdaughter, children don’t remember their parent who died. So, it’s not so much that you’re replacing the parent who’s not there anymore, in their eyes you’re trying to replace their parent who is still in their life, and who has been the family leader for as long as they can remember. My daughter literally didn’t understand what a mom was. So when I asked her to help set the table or clean up her room she took offense to it. And why wouldn’t she? Her dad had been the one to take care of everything. Now she had to do them?
    • Even if they understand what it means to have two parents in their lives, they still are resentful of having to acquiesce to a new authority. My stepson was very territorial of his mom’s place in the family. As such, he was obstinate about almost everything I asked him to do. Looking back, it would have been better to pick two chores that their dad did for them that I wanted them to do for themselves instead of insisting on completely changing all of their routines.
  • Present a united front.
    • We’ve heard this before, but it bears repeating. A strong family unit will not prevail if kids see a rift between the parents. They follow the cues of their biological parent. When my husband would be out of town for business, the kids and I always got along so much better. It was amazing how much easier the dinner hour was. Just little things. As long as the biological parent wasn’t there, it was ok to let me lead the family.
    • Agree with your spouse on what new routines you’ll introduce and when. It’s not a ”stepmom thing”, it’s a family thing. Whether you’re present or not, your spouse supports your new routines.
  • Practice patience.
    • Things will get better in time. Communication and empathy can bridge many disagreements. And in the end, you and your spouse will have raised children who are well-mannered, well-educated and most of all well-loved.

 

Hi! I'm an empty nester from Denver, Colorado. I have a background in education and am focusing my next chapter of my life on writing, mainly fiction but I also wanted to share my parenting experience as a step mom. My son is 23 and my daughter is 20. Thanks!

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Daycare or Nanny? Use This Checklist to Help Make Your Childcare Decision

By Amanda Tallent

Spending time with your little one is the best part of being a parent but unfortunately, we can’t always be there to watch our kids. When looking for someone else to take care of them, you want someone you can trust and the number of options can be daunting. However, by carefully weighing your needs and the needs of your child against the factors that affect your decision, you will likely be able to make an informed choice.

You’ve probably considered a daycare, nanny, or maybe a family member but which option is best for your family?

 

What to Consider in Your Search for Childcare

Cost: It’s likely that the number one consideration when seeking the best childcare option for you family is also based on your finances. There is no getting around the fact that childcare is excessively (even prohibitively) expensive. Studies show that while the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services quotes a healthy cost for childcare to represent 10% of the income of a family, the average cost can be significantly higher.

In places where childcare is the most expensive, like Washington D.C. for example, care can cost an average of $3,000 a month and families spend more to the tune of 25% of their annual salary. Making a budget is crucial. As you begin to plan financially for childcare, make sure you take into account your eligibility for tax credits. While the Child Dependent Tax Credit will not cover all of your expenses, it may allow you to find a more desirable option within your means.

Schedules: If you need someone to watch your child at regular times everyday while you are at work, a daycare may be a less expensive and more clear cut option for you. If, on the other hand, your work schedule tends to be a bit more flexible, or if you only need a couple of hours a day covered, you may want to lean further toward a nanny situation.

Environment: You know your child best and understand if they will thrive in a social atmosphere or if they will feel overwhelmed. This may play into your decision. Take into account the environment you want your child to grow up in and determine your ideal scenario.

To help you compare each of your childcare options, use a checklist to aid in your search and be on the lookout for all of your necessities (and red flags).

The Pros and Cons of Daycare: 

If you’re considering daycare there are positives and negatives you’ll want to run through.

Benefits of Daycare:

  • Costs are generally less than what a nanny would charge.

  • Daycare encourages socialization with other children which is important for development.

  • Curated activities are generally part of a daycare situation including educational toys, games and field trips.

  • Government accreditation can be a good indication of a daycare that is well managed and has to conform to cleanliness, class sizes and general safety standards.

  • A number of teachers mean that if a staff member gets ill you can still receive care, also it’s likely that staff members have training in child development.

  • Daycare may have many reviews that give you a sense of ease that it is reliable.

Some Disadvantages of Daycare:

  • There are more germs to be exposed to, meaning the cycle of sickness comes earlier and can infest the whole household.

  • Daycares usually have strict hours and therefore if your job is less predictable, you may have difficulty with timing.

  • The greater the number of children at daycare the less individualized attention your child may have. This means that more accidents are possible and it can be more stressful for your child.

The Pros and Cons of Hiring a Nanny:

While daycare has certain conveniences that make it favorable, sometimes a nanny makes more sense. That said there are negative aspects to nanny care as well.

Benefits of a Nanny Include:

  • Personal individualized care for your child which leads to an improved sense of attachment for your child to the caregiver.

  • Staying in a familiar environment where you can control safety, food access, and other aspects of your child’s care.

  • Flexibility that might allow you to have a more erratic schedule or be able to use the same person when you need an evening off as well.

Some Disadvantages of Having a Nanny:

  • If your nanny is ill it’s likely that you’ll need to call a backup option or stay home.

  • Recommendations may be fewer than with daycares as even an experienced nanny may have only worked with one or two families.

  • Nanny care can be costly.

  • Having to manage an employee can be a little trying, including keeping up with payments, sick time and vacation days.

Ultimately, you have to balance your options and see what makes the most sense with your budget and what your childcare needs represent. This checklist plus asking around, doing your research will help provide all the information you need to make the right decision for you.

I declared my dream of being a mom at the age of five years old on my kindergarten graduation day when answering the age-old question "what do you want to be when you grow up?" Many years later, it still seems like the best job in the world. 

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Thrifty Ways to Save Money on Technology

By Faizan Raza

Buying the latest tech gadgets is anything but cheap. Still, technology has become a major part of modern life. Thus, it is practically impossible to live without it. However, if you are resourceful, there are a wide range of effective ways in which you can reduce the money you spend on gadgets. Get acquainted with five simple tips to do that.

Sell Your Old Devices

Before thinking about purchasing the latest iPhone or tablet, you should first think about selling or trading your old device, as there is a wide range of retailers that offer you this opportunity. The newer your gadget is, the more credit you can receive in exchange. You should consider opting for companies that offer credit in exchange, as there are others that typically provide users with gift cards. Another way you can earn money after your older device is selling it on eBay.

Determine Your Needs

Before considering updating your gadgets, you should determine the amount of storage space you genuinely need. This way, you won’t get tricked by a clever salesperson to purchase more than you need. Your gadget purchases ought to meet your individual requirements; there’s no reason to buy expensive gadgets if you don’t have use of it.

Consider Online Shopping

If you didn’t consider online shopping before, it’s time you did that. Shopping online offers you the possibility to browse for hours before deciding on a particular product and get acquainted with the price range, particular properties and everything you need to know about the gadget you have in mind. Even though it requires a lot of your patience, it’s significantly convenient as online shopping offers you a wide range of great deals and coupons you can take advantage of.

When Possible, Opt for Free Software

Whether you were aware of the fact that you can opt for free software or not, there is a wide range of online services that provide users with free, equally effective free services. This software offers the same functions without additional, exorbitant costs. Still, while this alternative is not always available, you should always browse for obtaining products that meet your needs for lower costs. Simply reimburse yourself with patience and start browsing online.

Consider Skipping the Extended Warranty

While some people consider extended warranty to be an official guarantee that their products will be protected for a longer amount of time, the truth is that the steep prices to extended warranty cost increasingly more than the amount of money you would pay in the worst case scenario where you have to fix your gadget. As a matter of fact, retailers make larger sums of money from selling extended warranty than from the product themselves. Most of your gadgets will work perfectly, and in case they break down, the amount of money you saved will imminently cover the possible expenses associated with repair. Skipping extended warranty will undoubtedly help you save money, that’s a given.

This post originally appeared on TechCo.

I love RedTri authors, publishing, and talking incessantly about them. My passion is partnering with authors to bring worthwhile content to publication. I started blog as a way to create a community of writers, both published and seeking publication.

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Here’s Why Superhero Play Is Good for Your Child’s Development

by Erica Loop

The littles zip across the playroom floor, swishing capes trailing behind them. They run, tumble, jump and whirl in an elaborate superhero-fueled scene. Whether they’re acting out the newest Marvel movie or are imagining their own scenario starring Spiderman, your kids are majorly into this kind of pretend play. And science says it’s okay.

When it comes to superhero play, science may actually say it’s more than okay. As it turns out, what seems like a simple good versus bad guy routine may benefit your pre-k kiddo in some pretty impressive ways.

photo: Porapak Apichodilok via Pexels

So what can superhero play do for your young child? According to a 2015 article on the subject, published in the journal Pastoral Care in Education, superhero play can help children improve language skills, social skills and problem-solving abilities. Beyond these developmental benefits, this type of pretend fantasy play can also help preschool-aged kids cope with fears.

Your preschooler doesn’t have the cognitive ability to process scary or uncertain situations in the same way that you do. Don’t worry, they will—just not right now. Superhero play allows the young child to take on a powerful role and basically defeat evil. This gives the child the chance to explore a new role and feel a sense of power.

Dr. Gene Beresin, executive director of the Clay Center for Young Healthy Minds at Massachusetts General Hospital, told Romper, “They are beginning to appreciate that in many situations, they feel helpless, fearful, powerless, unable to overcome many obstacles. Many are afraid of the dark, monsters, being separated from parents, or harmed by ‘bad guys.’ They look for ominous creatures under their beds. They worry and fear about being helpless and weak in the face of adversity.”

Beresin sums up this powerful benefit, telling Romper, “By identifying with superheroes, they become strong, invincible, use superpowers, aggression, and other skills to protect themselves, and ally fears.”

—Erica Loop

 

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Kristen Bell Is NOT Having It When It Comes to Snow White (& We Kind of Agree)

by Karly Wood

When it comes to teaching kids life lessons, nothing is off-limits, as evidenced by Kristen Bell’s thoughts on Snow White in a recent interview with Parents. The Frozen actress and mom of two shared her sentiments about the classic fairytale and we have to admit—she brings up some pretty valid points.

Bell spoke about her love of reading with daughters, Lincoln (5) and Delta (3). But she noted that Snow White‘s messages about strangers and consent are bit concerning, especially in this day and age with a bit more modern sensibilities. Bell explained that while she’s no fan of Snow White, the fairytale poses the perfect opportunity to talk  about such serious concepts with her little ones.

Bell uses the scenario of Snow White accepting the poisoned apple from the evil witch to address stranger danger. She tells Parents, “Every time we close Snow White I look at my girls and ask, ‘Don’t you think it’s weird that Snow White didn’t ask the old witch why she needed to eat the apple? Or where she got that apple?’ I say, ‘I would never take food from a stranger, would you?’ And my kids are like, ‘No!'”

The actress goes on to find that Prince Charming could use a little workshopping when it comes to consent, too. When he sneaks in to give Snow White the sleep-awakening kiss, he misses an important step––asking for permission. Bell asks her kiddos, “Don’t you think that it’s weird that the prince kisses Snow White without her permission? Because you can not kiss someone if they’re sleeping!”

Can we all get a slow clap for mama Bell? You know you’ve got an amazing mom when she takes the time to turn a princess story into a lesson about stranger danger and consent! Legit #momgoals.

––Karly Wood

Photo: Kristen Bell via Instagram

 

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7 Ways to Keep the Kids Entertained in the Grocery Store

by Amber Guetebier
Partner Content

It’s time to get cooking but wait..you need a few (dozen) ingredients to make your masterpiece. And you’ve got to bring the kids. How to keep them busy at the grocery store when trips are frequent and carts loaded? We’re hoping these tips and tricks will work like a charm. Scroll down before your next shopping trip! 

Jomjakkapat Parrueng/Unsplash

1. Speed through your list with a supermarket race. 

Take your list and divide it up among the family members. If it’s just you and the kid(s)—and you think it’s safe— give them ten items on the list to find on their own and time them. If you’ve got enough to form teams, do it! Each team has the same amount or near amount of items and races to get them all and get to the check out line first. Parse the list on purpose so items are near each other and you just saved yourself at least 20 minutes, mama. Score! Even if your child is really young, give them an item or two to grab in the same aisle you are in. 

2. Play find and seek as you shop. 

Before you head to the store, create a checklist of things kids can easily spot in the grocery store—and a few tricky items—and hand it to the kids once you arrive. Include produce, people, and even scenarios. You can also adapt this DIY farmer’s market bingo set to your grocery store or this checklist of pantry essentials you’re likely to spot in the store.

Canva

3. Let the kids hatch a meal plan and then shop the ingredients. 

Let them pick a recipe and then draw or write up a list of the ingredients they will need. They can shop and later help prep, so double bonus! 

4. Tell them to wear a costume. 

Nobody says you need to wear sensible clothes to the grocery store! Bust out a cape, a crown, a ballgown or last year’s Halloween ensemble. Give them “control” over the situation want. n by allowing them to dress in whatever wild outfit they want.

photo: TheVirtualDenise via pixabay

5. Create a pretend play scenario! 

Prep for your mission at home (see above, re: costume) and lay out the plot on the way to the store. You are spies seeking the missing can of beans that no one knows was gone. Or you are master chefs preparing a meal for the Queen. Or maybe you just landed on Earth from another planet and are amazed at this magical place full of foodstuffs. 

6. Allow them to be part of the decision making by letting them pick out special items.

In addition to letting the kids cross goods off the list, allow them to pick out a few special things. They can be for school lunches, or for someone they love—i.e. Grandpa’s fave cookies, a treat for their best friend, a new dishtowel just for the kids to use. It doesn’t need to be sweet (but hey, we’re not above bribery) or expensive, and it could be something you need anyway. “We’re going to get this jam for your cousins when they visit!” might just be the well-timed, enthusiastic sway you need to avoid a meltdown.

7. Do a dry run. 

No, we are not suggesting you go Thanksgiving shopping and not buy anything. Try a dry run at the store here and there, when you are just grabbing one item or you don’t really need something that badly. When you are there, point out exciting things at the store like the beautiful produce or the yummy samples. Then, the next time you need to go you can invoke the power of memory, “We’re going to the store with the free cookie! Yay!”

 

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8 Must-Have Items for a Kid-Safe Home

By Shanise Williams

Home safety is the most important thing in the world. What could matter more than keeping your beloved family members safe? If you want to guarantee a household that’s secure, comfortable and smooth sailing in general, these helpful home safety features can go a long way for you.

Carbon Monoxide & Smoke Detectors

Carbon monoxide and smoke detectors are two things that are 100 percent essential for proper residential safety setups. It’s important to make sure these things are correctly installed. Smoke detectors are necessary for the majority of United States homes. Carbon monoxide detectors are necessary for many of them, too. If your home is equipped with a fireplace or a connected garage, you need an efficient and dependable carbon monoxide detector on the premises.

Sprinkler System

Sprinkler systems are home safety features that can potentially save your life. If you ever experience a massive fire on your property, a good sprinkler system can help get it under control. This can be priceless.

Fire Extinguisher

Fires can be serious dangers to residential properties of all types. A sprinkler system may not be enough to take charge of a fire, either. If you want additional security, it can help immensely to have a couple fire extinguishers in your home. An extinguisher can stop fires and stop them from escalating and intensifying as well. That can in some situations mean the difference between life and death.

First-Aid Kit

First-aid kits may seem obvious, but they’re not. There are actually many American households that lack first-aid kits, surprisingly enough. If you ever experience any kind of medical emergency, you need to have a comprehensive first-aid kit on hand, zero exceptions. A good first-aid kit should consist of bandages, tweezers, gauze, antibiotic ointment and antiseptic wipes. Emergencies can occur at literally any time. Your child can trip on a big toy and severely injure himself. You can accidentally cut your finger while chopping vegetables for dinner as well.

Corded Landline Telephone

Most people aren’t exactly keen on corded telephone use these days. They often forget about these kinds of phones in general. Landlines, however, can be excellent for people who are interested in a little extra security, comfort and peace of mind. Urgent matters can pop up at any time. Emergency situations often lead to power outages and occupied cell phone towers as well. If you want to have a phone available in the event of an emergency scenario, a trusty landline can be a significant help.

Home Warranty

Home warranties can give homeowners peace of mind. That’s because they’re contracts that pay for appliance and system replacement and repair services of all varieties. If you don’t want to have to worry about the possibility of electrical system headaches, a good home warranty and a good insurance plan can help you in a big way. Remember, electrical issues can often pose serious hazards to people. A solid warranty can help you eliminate electrical troubles and therefore keep your household safe and secure all year long. In addition, be sure to search for home insurance quotes that meet the needs of your home.

Ladders

Ladders can be extremely helpful in the event of pressing and time-sensitive emergency scenarios at home. If you’re unable to get to your home’s primary floor for whatever reason, the presence of a reliable emergency ladder can be highly useful to all. An emergency ladder can often keep severe injuries at bay as well.

Other Must-Have Security Features in Homes

There are so many critical home security features available to people in this day and age. If you want to feel safe and happy while at home, you need to make sure you invest in as many of them as possible. Other vital house security features include lightning rods, upgraded heating systems, security systems and deadbolt locks.

You should never take a chance on your home safety. You should never scrimp on it, either. A good residential security setup is worth all of the money in the world.

 

Featured Photo Courtesy: Daria Shevtsova via Pexels

I am a mom of three children and I love to write in my free time. I have loved to write about my trials and success of being a mom as well as the different tips, tricks and hacks I've learned for raising kids.

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29 Things Every Mom Can Immediately Relate To

By Nicole Merritt

“A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It’s jolted by every pebble on the road.” –Henry Ward Beecher

You know you’re a Mom if:

  1. Your attempt to teach your children fiscal responsibility and resourcefulness involves you drawing toe puppets on their feet instead of buying them actual finger puppets.
  2. You are capable of using the potty while still wearing your baby inside of your Baby Bjorn.
  3. You say the word “potty” when referencing the toilet—even when amongst adults.
  4. You have come to realize that you will NEVER drink a full cup of hot coffee ever again (unless your children are at grandma’s house).
  5. You haven’t showered… in a day, or in peace, or by yourself, or without a single interruption… or without thoughts of your children or your to-do-list running through your mind since the day they were born.
  6. You forget what your real name is because all you ever hear is “Mom,” Mommy,’ “Momma” or “Moooooooooommmmmm!!”
  7. You turn so rapidly that you almost get whiplash each and every time you hear a cry for “Mom,”  even when it’s not your child.
  8. Your clothes are covered in snot from being used as a boogey wipe—and you are completely fine with it.
  9. You crave some personal time, but feel guilty whenever you take it.
  10. Doing the dishes alone—or even shaving one leg—feels like personal time.
  11. You prepare for every outing by making your diaper bag into a Mary Poppins bag by having every single item that you could possibly need for every possible scenario that could possibly occur with three children ages six and under. (That’s tiring just talking about it!)
  12. You take your diaper bag with you on date night because you don’t own a “real” purse anymore.
  13. Your ideal date night involves your pajamas, the couch, a gluttonous amount of food and enough alcohol to make you forget that you are a responsible parent.
  14. Your “word of the day”—everyday—is “No.”
  15. 99 percent of your children’s words is a whined and elongated “Nooooooo.”
  16. You can do each and every skill you have with your non-dominant hand because you darn well have to when the baby won’t let you put her down.
  17. You can slam the pantry door with your hip, close the oven with a swift kick of the foot and pick up dropped socks with your toes. (I hope that last one isn’t just me!)
  18. You use baby wipes to clean up absolutely everything… and I mean EVERYTHING. (This Momma ain’t never met a baby wipe she didn’t like.)
  19. You have a constant feeling that you are screwing up at motherhood.
  20. You are actually screwing up motherhood on occasion. (Don’t worry; they’ll turn out just fine.)
  21. The messy top-knot is your hairst‌yle of choice every single day.
  22. You wear the top-knot because you often forget about your own self-care and that thing called “hair-washing.”
  23. Poop and vomit don’t gross you out.
  24. You don’t think it’s awkward to smell your children—for poop or vomit—all of the time, in any place.
  25. Two hours of undisturbed sleep makes you feel like a new, well-rested woman.
  26. You sway while waiting in any line, even when you are not pregnant or holding a child.
  27. Your shopping cart on any given Thursday contains wine—at least two bottles.
  28. You forget to turn off your kid’s music when they leave the car and you continue to jam out until you awkwardly realize that you no longer have to listen to it.
  29. Going to “Club Bed” with “DJ Nighty-Nighty” is your idea of a good time on a weekend night.

Have some hilarious ones of your own? Please share them, and let us all share a laugh along with you—sometimes it’s the only thing that gets us through the day!

Featured Photo Courtesy: pexels; jthreeNMe
Nicole Merritt is the Owner & Founder of jthreeNMe, an imperfectly authentic peek at real-life marriage, parenting and self-improvement. jthreeNMe is empowering, inspiring and entertaining: It’s like chicken soup for those who are exhausted, over-stressed and under-inebriated, yet still utterly happy. Nicole's has contributed for Scary Mommy, The Good Men Project, BLUNTmoms and many more.  
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