51 Totally Goofy Birthday Jokes for Kids

1. What do you say to a rabbit on its birthday? 

Hoppy Birthday! 

2. Why do candles always go on the top of cakes?

Because it’s hard to light them from the bottom. 

3. What do cakes and baseball teams have in common?

They both need a good batter. 

4. What goes up but never comes down?

Your age. 

5. What does every birthday end with?

The letter Y.

6. What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?

Aye matey. 

7. What did the tiger say to her cub on his birthday?

It’s roar birthday! 

8. Why did the girl put her cake in the freezer?

She wanted to ice it. 

9. Why did the cupcake go to the doctor’s office?

It was feeling crumby. 

10. What one thing will you get every year on your birthday, guaranteed?

A year older. 

11. What do you give a 3100 lb. rhino for his birthday?

I don’t know, but you better hope he likes it. 

12. Does a green candle burn longer than a pink one?

No, they both burn shorter. 

13. Why did the little girl hit her birthday cake with a hammer?

It was a pound cake.

14. Did the teddy bear want cake on his birthday?

No, he was stuffed. 

15. Why did we have to send the cake to the doctor?

It was feeling crumby.

16. Why did the student eat their homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!

17. Why did the robber break into the bakery?

She heard the cakes were rich.

18. What kind of music is bad for balloons?

Pop. 

19. What do clams like to do on their birthdays?

Shell-ebrate.

20. What song do you sing a Snowman on his birthday?

“Freeze a jolly good fellow…”

21. Did you hear about the tree’s birthday celebration?

It was really sappy. 

22. What did the cake say to the ice cream?

You’re cool. 

23. What kind of cake do ghosts like?

I Scream Cake.

24. How do pickles celebrate their birthday?

They relish it. 

25. What does a turtle do on its birthday?

Shell-ebrates. 

26. What’s the cleanest type of birthday party joke?

One that’s a soap-prise. 

27. What happens when you invite a thief to your birthday party?

They take the cake! 

28. What kind of cake do you eat if you are sick on your birthday?

Coffee cake. 

29. Why can’t kids remember past birthdays?

Because they are too focused on the present. 

30. What did one candle say to the other?

Don’t birthdays just burn you out?

31. Why was the birthday cake so hard?

It was a marble cake! 

32. Knock knock! 

Who’s there?

Wanda.

Wanda who?

Wanda wish you a happy birthday! 

33. What do you say to a kangaroo on their birthday?

Hoppy Birthday! 

34. What’s hairy and covered in fondant? 

A coconut cake. 

35. What did the cake say to the donut?

You’re looking glazed over. 

36. What happens when your dad chugs 8 sodas at your birthday party?

He burps 7-Up. 

37. What do you call a bunch of balloons in the bathroom?

A birthday potty. 

38. What do frogs drink at their birthday parties?

Diet croak. 

39. If you have a dozen eggs in one hand and 10 cupcakes in the other, what do you have?

Crazy-big hands. 

40. How do cats bake cake?

From scratch! 

—young reader Jacey

41. What did the cake say to the fork?

You wanna’ piece of me?? 

42. How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker was getting for his birthday?

He felt his presents. 

43. What happens if no one comes to your birthday party?

You can have your cake and eat it, too. 

44. What kind of music do balloons hate?

Pop music. 

45. What do mermaids do on their birthdays?

They shell-abrate. 

46. What did the birthday card say to the stamp?

Stick with me, we’re going places! 

47. What is a tornado’s favorite party game?

Twister! 

48. Why did the cupcake cross the road?

It had muffin else to do! 

49. Why don’t owls give each other presents on their birthdays?

Because they don’t give a hoot! 

50. What did the King of the Underworld say when Zeus gave him boring socks for his birthday?

I Hades! 

51. What did the mama say to her baby on his birthday?

Nappy Birthday! 

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