For those lucky enough to be born in March, count yourself among a select group of creative dreamers who are empathetic and optimistic. According to studies (and a smidge of astrology, if you believe in that kind of thing), here are eight cool traits and factoids that make March birthdays special.

Looking for other months? Check out interesting facts about people born in April, people with February birthdays, and facts about people born in May.

You might end up with a night owl

According to this sleep study published by the National Library of Medicine, sleep habits are affected by when you’re born. The findings suggest that kids born in spring and summer tend to stay up later than those born during the winter months due to the increased photoperiod directly after birth, which leads to phase delay (your body telling you it’s nighttime and therefore bedtime) of the human circadian system.

March is a month of dreamers and heroes

Those born under the sign of Pisces are also charismatic, affectionate, and generous. If you’ve got a Pisces baby, support their boundless imagination with plenty of pretend play, creative outlets, and games. Because those born under this half of March’s zodiac sign are empathetic, they’ll go above and beyond for their loved ones. 

The birthstone for March represents youth, good health, and hope

The aquamarine gem is a luxurious blue, and while it isn’t considered a precious stone, is often associated with not only good health and hope but a feeling of calm, trust, and fearlessness. According to Truly Experiences, sailors used to carry aquamarine with them on sea voyages for protection, as the semi-precious gem was thought to be the treasure of the mermaids.

March babies have pretty good eyesight

While winter-born babies have the best vision overall, babies born in spring have been shown to have better eyesight than their summer friends, according to a study of 300,000 military applicants. A co-author of the study explains that babies born in the summer months have a 25% chance of becoming nearsighted. The reason? The study suggests that the cause might be long-term exposure to natural light in early life.

Solitude is a must for some of those with March birthdays

Pisces babies (Feb. 19-Mar. 20) love people, but they love solitude just as much. Known as super creative and imaginative, March babies enjoy getting lost in their thoughts and are content to spend time alone.

March babies are romantic and soulful

Guided more by intuition than by structure, those born under the sign of Pisces are ideal partners and friends. They tend to be compassionate and have an open heart that forgives and forgets easily. They can tap into the feelings of their loved ones and be empathetic, which is a plus in moments of conflict.

There are plenty of celebrities with March birthdays

Famous people like a little extra luck too! People born in March share their birthday month with lots of famous people, including Justin Bieber, Shaquille O’Neal, Chuck Norris, Queen Latifah, Reese Witherspoon, Bruce Willis, Elton John, Sarah Jessica Park, and more.

—with additional reporting by Karly Wood

 

Bring the kids to these ski resorts near Portland so they can learn the ropes—make that slopes—this season

Winter is here, and while Portlanders know that means rain in the Rose City, it also means snow in the mountains. That’s why now is the perfect time to take the kids skiing or snowboarding at a nearby Portland ski resort over a long weekend or whenever you’ve got time. Offering everything from lessons on the gentlest bunny hills around to expert black diamond runs your kids can aspire to conquer, these spots top our list for winter family fun. We’ll keep wishing for more of the white stuff so you can hit the slopes with the kids all the way through March.

Fantastic Places to Ski near Portland

Mt. Hood Skibowl

two kids ski down a mountain doing pizza wedges with trees in the background ski resorts near Portland
Shutterstock

With close to 1,000 acres of terrain, 69 day runs, and over 300 inches of snowfall each year, there are hours of fun to be had at Skibowl. And the short drive from Portland makes it a great starting point for Portland families interested in a ski day. Beginners have lots of choices at this ski mountain, including runs at Skibowl East near the snow tube and Adventure Park, plus kiddie snowmobiles, a kiddie carousel, Frosty’s Playground, and an indoor play area when they need a break. Lessons are available for kids as young as 4 (including snowboarding), and it's easy to sign up when you get there. But Skibowl isn't just for beginners. This ski area also boasts more black diamond runs than at any other ski resort in the state.

Good to Know: Night skiing is definitely a thing at Skibowl; their 36 lighted runs easily tell that story. Part of the nighttime mountain fun? Cosmic tubing.

Drive time from Portland: Just under 1 hour

87000 U.S. 26
Government Camp, OR
Online: skibowl.com

Related: Snow Much Fun! 8 Places to Go Sledding & Tubing

Mt. Hood Meadows

Meadows offers varied terrain that challenges skiers at all levels on over 2,150 acres. From Heather Canyon to South Canyon, and from Buttercup to Show Off, there’s something for everyone. For children between the ages of four and fourteen, camps, lessons, and clubs are available. You can purchase your lift ticket or season pass online in advance. 

Insider Tip: For something a little different, try a snowshoe tour at Mt. Hood Meadows. They're family-friendly (although usually best for older kids) and some run through March, so you've got plenty of time to plan one this year.

Good to Know: If lessons aren't something your kids are up for, you can drop them at the Meadows Daycare. One of the only ski resorts in the nation to offer state-certified care for kids as young as 6 weeks, parents can sign kids up for the day or for a run of days so they can get in all the runs. Just be sure to get your reservations ASAP as spots are limited.

Drive time from Portland: About 90 minutes

14040 Hwy. 35
Mt. Hood, OR
Online: skihood.com

Timberline Lodge

The fact you can ski for 10 months out of the year, and the addition of Summit Pass (formerly Summit Ski Area), makes Timberline an easy choice for Portland families on the hunt for a ski resort they can return to year after year. Get to know the 1,685 acres of skiable terrain at both Timberline and Summit Pass with the kids. Summit Pass is a great spot for beginning snowboarders and skiers alike. It's also where you'll find the snow tubing lanes. It's a great option for families looking for lessons and affordability. Six high-speed quads, two doubles, and one surface lift get families where they need to go. And although the two terrains aren't yet lift connected, there are plenty of shuttle options so you can try their both on your trip. 

Insider Tip: Timberline's terrain parks offer everything from the Schoolyard (perfect for beginners) to Conway's big jumps. Even if the kids aren't ready for it yet, it's fun to watch others tackle the snowy jumps and rails.

Good to Know: Beginning ski lessons are available for kids as young as 4 on weekends (and holidays) only.

Drive time from Portland: About 90 minutes

Online: timberlinelodge.com

Related: 9 Easy Weekend Getaways Your Family Needs This Winter

Cooper Spur

Located on the north side of Mt. Hood this historic ski area (it's one of the oldest in North America) offers lots of rideable terrain for first time skiers and boarders. An affordable option for families, this ski area is on the smaller size. The double chairlift will bring you to the top of the runs where you'll find gentle blues, a few greens, and one black diamond. Kids ages 7 and up can learn the ropes on the tow rope when they sign up for a group or private lesson. No matter which option you choose, the price is hard to beat.

Drive time from Portland: About 90 minutes

10755 Cooper Spur Rd.
Mt. Hood, OR
Online: cooperspur.com

Hoodoo Ski Area

an adult and kid at a ski resort near portland with snow and a lift in the background are going down a hill side by side
Lex Valishvili via unsplash

For a full day or better yet a family weekend trip, Hoodoo Ski Area in Sisters, just outside of Bend, is a worthy destination. You'll find it at the summit of Santiam Pass, drawing visitors from all over the state, thanks to its central location. The mountain has five lifts and 34 runs that are a nice mix of green, blue, and black, so no matter how many times you've taken to the slopes (one or 100 times), you'll have plenty of powder to explore. 

Insider Tip: The Autobahn Tubing park is currently closed due to staffing shortages.

Good to Know: Winter weekends here offer up a little something extra, like mountain mascot Harold the Hodag's birthday on February 18, Winter Carnival the following weekend, Ski Bike Fest in March, and more. Be sure to check their calendar for upcoming extras that are worth the drive.

Drive time from Portland: About 2.5 hours

Online: skihoodoo.com

Where to Go Cross-Country Skiing

Teacup Lake

J G D via unsplash

Escape the speed demon crowds, and enjoy downhill’s quieter winter kin—cross-country skiing. Enjoy 24 kilometers (that's about 12 miles) of groomed trails, relative solitude, and a spectacular view of Mt. Hood once you pass frozen and snow-covered Teacup Lake in the Mt. Hood National Forest. There are groomed tracks and a skating lane, and all are groomed Mondays, Wednesdays, Saturdays, and Sundays. Teacup’s pristine trails stay that way because dogs and snow shoes are not allowed; that plus a friendly emphasis on a particular standard of trail etiquette. When you need to warm up, head to the Ray Garey Cabin to shake off the cold.

Insider Tip: If you're a family a first-timers, Teacup offers an array of learn-to-ski classes for kids as young as 6.

Good to Know: An Oregon Sno-Park permit is required to park here. Only pit toilets available on-site.

Drive time from Portland: Just over 1 hour

Online: teacupnordic.org

Related: 8 Wondrous Hikes That Are Best in Winter

a family skis at a ski resort near portland during winter, snowy background with mountains
Shutterstock

Tips for a Successful Ski Day with Kids:

1. Expect shorter skiing days, especially if naps are still part of your family routine. Runs open early, so you can make the most of your day by getting up and at 'em as early as possible. Then heading back down the mountain around afternoon nap time. There's no doubt the kids will be tired after a day on the slopes.

2. Snacks and water are a must. No matter where you're eating on the mountain, everyone always seems to be hungry at the same time. Avoid meltdowns by packing extras for hungry kids, and avoid wait times by eating around peak times.

3. When it comes to buying gear, kids' growth spurts make buying a little frustrating financially, so renting is a great option. Although the one piece of gear to purchase (according to experts) is a good helmet.

4. It’s always a good idea to check weather and road conditions at ODOT's Trip Check before heading out for the day. Snow conditions on the mountain are a must too. All of these resorts have condition cameras that livestream so you can plan your day to go as smoothly as possible.

Fellow parents were texting me in full-blown panic: “How is K doing?!? Is she hating it?!” We had just started remote distance learning and a flurry of texts came flashing over my cell phone. I peered over at my content daughter, happily typing away at her laptop and thought, “This is an introvert’s dream come true!”

Pexels

To understand the introverted child, it's important to understand this: scientists believe that the introverted brain is one that is sensitive to the neurotransmitter dopamine because it has fewer receptors. In plain talk: too much dopamine through social stimulation, excitement and activity causes the introverted child to feel overwhelmed. This is why introverts prefer calm, quiet activities such as reading, writing or enjoying the company of one or two trusted friends as opposed to the social hubbub of larger gatherings. Introverts are born this way; there's nothing wrong with them—this is how they are wired.

 

Magical Daydream

In a society that encourages outgoing behavior and children to speak up and participate in classrooms, introverts are sometimes mistaken as shy, lacking confidence, weird or even troubled. With guidance, introverted children can flourish and thrive in a gregarious society. Over the years on my parenting journey, I have found a few tips that have been helpful for me, as an extrovert, in raising an introverted child.  Although parenting is never a one-size-fits-all plan or formula, I hope that you might find one or two helpful tidbits below and if you have pearls of wisdom for me, I’d love to hear from you as well! 

Accept and Embrace Your Introverted Child

Little kids crowd around a birthday cake at home while one blows out a candle
iStock

It was the Nth birthday party in which K spent the entire duration at my side, clinging to my leg instead of socializing with her peers. “She’s tired, we’ve had a long week” I offered as a way of explanation yet again. Back at home, K happily played at her train table and with LEGOS. Why do I bother taking her to these parties? Why can’t she be more like Gabriella, the pre-school crowned “Mayor” I wondered? As an extrovert, I was exasperated and wanted K to be more like the other affable, talkative kids and also... well, like me.

I am ashamed to say that I both misunderstood K in her early years and also had a hard time accepting she wasn’t more outgoing. I tried desperately to galvanize her social calendar through arranging playdates and throwing large, lavish birthday parties—my idea of a good time, not hers. My advice to myself back then would be this: it’s ok for your kid to cling to your leg at social gatherings and it's ok to have small, quiet birthday parties or (gasp!) not have one at all. Bigger and louder is rarely (if ever) desirable for the easily overwhelmed introverted child. 

Provide a Safe Space (Both Literally & Figuratively & Respect That Space)

All children need safe spaces to retreat to but introverted children need them even more. While an extrovert may welcome you into their space, most often, the introvert will not. K sometimes spends hours in her room reading and drawing with the door closed and if left to her own devices, would happily stay in her room all day so long as three meals a day appeared outside her door. 

One day, K had her nose stuck in a book and was getting ready to head upstairs for yet another long afternoon on her own. Suddenly, she turned and announced, “Actually, I feel like company right now” and proceeded to flop on the couch next to me. The two of us continued our books in comfortable silence. I have found that giving K room and space to withdraw and recharge gives her the bandwidth to voluntarily and even proactively engage with others. 

Encourage Self-Expression Outlets 

Most introverts will tell you that they love reading; many are prolific but K took it to another level. Having taught herself to read, K was reading chapter books by kindergarten and tackling classics by second grade. Other quiet activities she loves to do alone are drawing, writing stories, origami, crafts and sewing. K also enjoys composing music and delights in any time spent in front of a piano. Again, self-expression is essential for all children but introverted children will gravitate towards ones that are done in solitude. Accept. Embrace. 

Know When to Push

American Camp Association

Fact: Introverts need to be goaded and coaxed into social gatherings and physical activity that require exiting the house. I have spent countless hours mentally preparing K for new (or old!) social situations. Be flexible and choose your battles. Allow extra time for mental prep. Sometimes a compromise might involve leaving early or not going to one gathering but promising to go to the next. You know your child best and know when they need a firm nudge. 

Recently, K joined our church’s youth group. We talked beforehand about what to expect and when we pulled up, she asked to be dropped off instead of being walked in as we previously agreed on. I watched as she exited the car, took a deep breath, squared her shoulders and headed into a courtyard full of strangers...anxious but determined. Our journey continues to this day and we are constantly figuring out ways to help her navigate our increasingly loud world but in that one moment, my sweet, brave girl had never made me prouder.

—Christine Lai

featured photo by Soccer Shots

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American families have proven the urge to travel after being cooped up from home, with demand for accommodations higher than ever. And while vaccines may be more accessible in the U.S. than ever, the spread of new variants and lower vaccination rates in developing countries continue impact our ability to move freely through the world.

Which is why Expedia Group, the travel giant that includes brands like Expedia, Hotels.com, Vrbo and more, is working to make sure those who are traveling again are doing so safely and responsibly in a way that ultimately slows the spread of COVID.

5 Tips to Help Keep Your Family Safe while Traveling

1. Mask up while traveling. This one is obvious, as masks continue to remain one of the most simple and effective ways to limit the transmission of the virus, aside from the vaccine. Traveling requires being in close quarters, like planes, trains, in rideshares, etc. so it’s important to mask up to reduce the spread.

2. Travel for the greater good. Expedia Group recently announced an initiative to support UNICEF’s global COVID-19 response by donating of $10 million to vaccine efforts. To get involved, travelers can download any app from one of the Expedia Group brands, such as Expedia, Hotels.com, Travelocity and Vrbo, plan and purchase a trip through the platform and in turn, they can help get a vaccine to someone in the world who needs it.

3. Enjoy the great outdoors. Nature destinations have provided solitude for travelers over the last year, due to the ability to easily socially distance and, essentially, disconnect. This trend is here to stay, with beaches, mountains, lakes and national parks remaining the popular areas to visit, even as we head into the fall.

4. Don’t get left behind. More and more businesses, attractions and destinations are requiring people to show proof of vaccination. So, if you haven’t felt motivated to get your shot(s), know that you might not be able to have access to dining, entertainment or other activities during your next vacation without it.

5. Be a savvy traveler. Travelers are eager to get out there again, but with travel guidelines changing so frequently, it’s important to stay up to date with restrictions and policies around your travel bookings. Double check your accommodations’ cancellation policies, keep local advisories like curfews or closures in mind and be prepared to submit documentations like COVID test results or vaccine cards.

Of course, it’s up to each individual family to decide their comfort level for taking trips again, and all are encouraged to check and adhere to local and national health guidelines and travel restrictions. Travelers are known to be passionate about exploring the world and making connections, but now it’s time for each individual to do their part so the world can truly open again.

RELATED: Red Tricycle’s COVID Resource Guide 

Melanie Fish is Vrbo’s travel expert and speaks to journalists daily about the fastest growing segment in the travel industry – vacation home rentals. She has shared travel trends and tips at the New York Times Travel Show, in magazines including Glamour, and on regular #TravelTuesday TV segments.

Starved Rock State Park is a popular spot for campers and anglers, and it’s no surprise why. The Illinois River has some of the best fishing opportunities and the park’s beautiful setting and proximity to Chicago make it an attractive destination for daytrippers—or a quick weekend away. In recent years, however, Starved Rock’s visitor numbers have surged. When the park reaches capacity, traffic can back up for miles, leaving adventure-seekers stuck in their cars instead of casting a line or taking in the scenery. Read on for equally dazzling places to enjoy nature without getting stuck in gridlock traffic.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CEqPL6jpp7H/?hidecaption=true

Lowden State Park

Located just 90 minutes from Chicago, Lowden State Park has 80 campsites with access to electricity and a shower building. There are another 46 primitive campsites, for a more rustic experience, in a separate campground. This park sits right on the Rock River, which has an average depth of about 3 feet at the height of summer. Rent a canoe or kayak from local outfitter White Pelican if you don't own your own boat, but there are docks located along the riverbank where the public can cast a line. Check out the dock by Margaret Fuller Island for a great view.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CBZSFlXDMqV/?hidecaption=true

Hennepin Canal

The Hennepin Canal is an ideal spot for families willing to trade amenities for solitude. The Hennepin Canal includes nine campgrounds, 150 miles of trails and some of the most abundant stocks of fish you’ll find in Illinois. All campsites are first-come-first-served, have no showers or running water, but toilets are available at each campground. Fishing on the canal is allowed 24 hours a day and trawlers should have no trouble pulling out bass, catfish, walleye, crappie and bluegill. Visitors who prefer to cast a line from their boat will find 29 miles of portage-free canoeing along the feeder canal from Rock Falls.

Spring Lake Park

Spring Lake Park outside Macomb has an impeccably maintained campground, with great amenities, and 6 miles of shoreline to cast from. Spring Lake is stocked with blue catfish, muskellunge, bass, bluegill and crappie. Campers have 102 campsites to choose from, with space for either tents, RVs, or cabins. An on-site bait shop rents pontoon boats, canoes, kayaks, paddleboards, paddleboats, and fishing poles. Within the park itself, there are over 12 miles of biking and hiking trails, so you’ll have plenty to do if the fish just aren’t biting.

Chain o’ Lakes State Park

Located about 60 miles north of Chicago, Chain o' Lakes State Park is great for families looking for a variety of activities. Camping is abundant, with 151 sites and three cabins. A concession stand rents boats and sells bait. Anglers will find bluegill, bass, walleye, crappie, muskie, northern pike, bullhead, and catfish. This park lives up to its name, with three lakes and the Fox River within the park itself. That means the shorelines get marshy and most fishing is done from either on a boat or designated fishing piers. Other activities at Chain o’ Lakes include hose rentals, hunting, and over 10 miles of hiking trails. There is even an accessible picnic area with a quarter-mile hiking trail, that will accommodate anyone with mobility concerns.

Nauvoo State Park

Nauvoo State Park is a stunning and peaceful place. This park is small, just 148 acres on the banks of the Mississippi River. It includes a 13-acre lake with one mile of shoreline, stocked with bass, catfish and bluegill. There are no boat docks or rentals, so be prepared to cast from the shoreline or use the primitive boat launch. Campers will find 105 camping spaces, a few short hiking paths and a playground area. Visit the in-park museum to learn about the town’s history as a stop for French explorers and as a settlement for early Mormons.

— Lindsay Welbers

Lindsay Welbers is the author of “Chicago Transit Hikes: A guide to getting out in nature without a car.” She lives on the Northwest side of Chicago and writes the ultralight camping blog “Third Coast Hikes” which encourages Chicagoans to explore their backyards, especially the corners they may not have considered before.

Featured photo: visionpic.net via Pexels

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Dear Daughters,

This week is the last week of school before summer break begins, and what a year it has been. During a global pandemic, online school, and several hardships, you made it.

This school year was rough. You spent the school year at home, working on makeshift desks. Your schoolwork was scattered around your bedroom floors instead of in lockers or cubbies. You couldn’t stand side by side with your friends during concerts, plays, and performances. There have been no laughter-filled cafeterias, crowded hallways, trips to the school library, or bumpy field trip bus rides.

Your teachers worked with you through computer screens and zoom squares, your counselors supported you, and your peers wanted to be with you. However, I was the lucky one to see you in person every day this school year.

I saw all of you overcome social anxiety and show your face on zoom. I saw you make new friends and include the ones that were left out. I saw you stand up for yourself when you were mistreated. I saw you advocate for yourself, block bullies, and speak up. I saw you work hard even when not feeling up to it. I saw you overcome stage fright to sing your song and act in your play. I saw you try new foods and conquer new recipes. I saw you fix broken technology, read new books, and learn new languages. I saw you gain patience as you worked through frustrating assignments. I saw you come up with practical solutions for tough projects. I saw you become best friends with each other. I saw you swallow your pride, and you ask when you needed help. I saw you take breaks when you needed peace. I saw you keep going when you wanted to give up. I saw you help around the house without being asked, and I saw you take pride in your personal space. With our home as your classroom, I got to see you grow smarter, wiser, and kinder every day.

The solitude was unfair, and I am sorry there are no in-person ceremonies or celebrations with certificates. Your achievements deserve to be celebrated. So, as you close your laptops one last time this school year, know that if it were up to me, dear daughters, you would win the award for resilience, and you would get honors in strength and a medal for perseverance.

You will never forget this school year; it was unlike any other. As you prepare for in-person school again, I hope that you hold your mom-given accolades in your heart. For they hold lessons of bravery wrapped in love, and they shaped you into who you are now. Stronger, braver, brighter, and ready for whatever comes next. I am proud of you, and you should be proud of yourself too.

I love you.

—Mom

RELATED:
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This post originally appeared on www.jamieedelbrock.com.

Jamie is married to her high school sweetheart and has three beautiful daughters. Through years of experience working with children, and raising her own, she knows how difficult parenting can be. She is an advocate for children's mental health and is best known for her creativity, optimism, and kind heart.

snoeshoe

Photo: Ali Flynn

Having four teenage girls, all in high school, you can imagine I am rarely by myself and if I happen to be, it is usually to use the restroom, shower, or on my way home after driving one of them to a friend’s house.

But last week I went snowshoeing alone…Deep in the woods.

Alone.

It took me some time to settle in and stop worrying a bobcat was going to jump out and attack me, but I kept moving forward.

Step by step, I gained more confidence and left my fears behind.

Alone…for the first time in a long time.

So there I was, alone in the woods.

Alone with my deepest thoughts.

Alone with the quiet and the sunlight peeking through the trees creating the most glorious shadows.

So as I walked along, listening to the crunching beneath my feet, I recognized that I truly wasn’t alone and an inner peace embraced me.

There I was, trudging through the pathway of white, in all of my fullness.

This alone time was a gift as I was wrapping myself up in self-love and providing a space to reflect and grow.

Who knew just a short three-mile snowshoeing trek could open up my heart to hearing and seeing new parts of myself.

Who knew the quiet and solitude would allow inner conversations to emerge and come to light.

And who knew being alone could feel so magical after so many years of always having my girls near me.

But maybe that’s it right there…

Maybe being alone is exactly what I needed in order to find more growth within… to strive to be a better mom and to think through things, really think, not the kind of thinking that gets done in-between loads of laundry and emptying the dishwasher.

 And what I realized was this…

I am blessed to never feel alone, even when one set of footprints, my own, trails behind in the snow. There may be one set of footprints but this mama of four will always see her family of six walking alongside her, even when alone. The six sets of footprints trailing behind and next to me is a blessing today and all the days moving forward.

There is no doubt the love and support of my family encourages, inspires, and moves me along as the footprints behind keep me company.

So all of this alone time got me thinking.

My eldest will be making her trek along a new path when she embarks on her college journey in the fall.

She may have moments where she feels alone.

She may feel alone on the evenings her dorm room is quiet and miss our bustling home, filled with high pitched laughter, screams of frustration, and some tears.

She may feel alone as she walks across a campus busy with other students, and miss those quiet moments holding her sister’s hand.

She may feel alone when she grabs a quick granola bar on the way to class rather than sharing her to-do list with me, as she looks on while I make her an egg sandwich.

But maybe being alone is just what she needs…

Maybe being alone allows the quiet to seep in while recalling the billowing laughter that wrapped her up each day in love.

Maybe being alone allows a sense of solitude to embrace her soul while remembering a sense of peace from each hug.

But as this heart of mine gets used to being more alone amongst the world of raising teenagers, I can only wish for my sweet girl to also know, even on the days she feels alone, there are always six sets of footprints trailing behind, supporting every path she embarks on.

Our family footprints will forever trail behind each and every one of us, making imprints along our unique paths of life.

 

 

Ali Flynn Is excited to share with you the joys and hardships of motherhood with an open heart, laughter and some tears. Ali is a monthly guest contributor for Westchester County Mom  and has been seen on Filter Free Parents, Grown and Flown, Today Parents and Her View From Home.

Inclusion. Quite possibly the most important piece of raising my child. What does that word even mean? It means a variety of things to a variety of individuals of course, but in its entirety, it means to be included by a group of people.

For my son, Beckett, what does that look like? You may think: “He doesn’t want to be around us. He doesn’t want to be included, Bri.” You may mean well. But my job as his mother, and a good human, is to educate and to advocate. To be his voice. So I’ll tell you, that in that instance, you would be wrong.

My son wants to be included, just like anyone else. He may need breaks. He may need some pauses of quiet, and solitude, and peace, just like anyone else. It just may be a bit more frequent for him.

He may not want to play cars, or house, or video games with your children. But he wants to be near them. He wants friends. He wants respect. He wants to be seen. A perfectly reasonable, unspoken request. That everyone deserves. Regardless of ability. Breaks are okay. Patience is necessary. And so is inclusion. More than anything.

For someone to say “Beckett, what are you watching/reading/doing? That’s neat! I’ll just sit by you if that’s okay.” That would mean the world. To him. To me. To attempt to enter his world, with no expectations or rules, but to just want to “be” with him. To know him is to love him. And I know that without a doubt. He undoubtedly makes this world brighter. A bit louder. A bit more unpredictable. And whole lot happier.

If others could look past the differences in “labels” placed across our chests (whether it be autism, or things like anxiety, depression, or the thousands of physical disabilities faced), and include all, this world would be a much better one. We’d have cracked “the code”, ‘round the globe.

I won’t stop fighting for my son, and all others like him, to be included. To be valued and not simply “tolerated” until I’m no longer here.

This post originally appeared on To Infinity & Beyond Words.

BriAnna is a stay-at-home mom to her Disney loving, son Beckett (5), and wife to her Navy  Veteran husband, Cameron. Beckett is Autistic and non-verbal, so BriAnna created her page, "To Infinity & Beyond Words" to shine a light of love on their world of special needs. Their family of three call Nebraska home, and call themselves blessed. 

More and more companies are committed to supporting their employees in working from home due to the pandemic and stay at home orders. This comes as a relief to parents with small children at home but it also brings new challenges to the workday. HeyMama and InHerSight conducted a study of 1,000 moms to discover the policies, resources, and support working mothers need from their employers, coworkers, and partners during the COVID-19 crisis as work from home policies continue. 

woman on laptop

Women are finding themselves working more, feeling less productive and are less satisfied with their jobs. While past studies have shown that remote employees are more productive than those who work in the office, it did not account for mothers homeschooling their children while keeping up with deadlines and other duties. 

The typical rules and results of working from home do not apply under these circumstances, so it is important for employers to consider how the pandemic is affecting their employees and reassess the expectations they have. 

The survey found that almost three in five working moms say they are less productive while working from home during COVID-19, yet two in five say they are doing more work. Additionally, nearly half of women who took our survey say they’re less satisfied with their jobs since working from home and taking care of children at the same time.

There is no denying that taking care of your children, along with having to educate and entertain them, is a full time job. Pair that with working from home and both will suffer. Moms working from home need more flexibility in both work hours and deadlines. 

“Flexibility has always been really important to women in general and moms specifically, as they try to balance work and life and make the best decisions for their families,” Ursula Mead, CEO and cofounder of InHerSight, says. “Throw in a pandemic and a lot of our day-to-day needs from regular, non-stressful times become that much more acute and critical.”According to our survey-takers, flexible work hours due to other demands on time and extended/flexible deadlines are the top two considerations they need from their employers.

If quarantine and social restrictions continue for the foreseeable future, working moms say flexible work hours are still a priority followed by paid time off and extended/flexible deadlines for work. 

“Flexibility can take a lot of different forms. It can be flexible work hours, deadlines, projects/assignments, or ways to use benefits and capital, and understanding the type of flexibility moms need as they work from home and during the pandemic,” Mead says.“Remember too that identifying your employees’ needs and supporting them is good for your business and your team’s morale and  productivity.”

Working moms also need their coworkers to understand that they have a lot on their plates right now. 

“While the current pandemic has been difficult for everyone, and people who cannot or choose not to have children are facing a slew of challenges, parents—seemingly overnight—became de facto teachers, helping their children navigate e-learning while simultaneously working, caring for any young children they may have, and taking care of their homes,” Katya Libin, CEO and cofounder of HeyMama, says. “Fifty-seven percent of mothers say COVID-19 has negatively impacted their mental health. While most parents cannot understand what it must be like to spend months on end devoid of any human contact—a reality for many single people who’ve been sheltering in place—those without children cannot fully understand what it’s like to lack any personal space or even a moment of solitude during lockdown, either.”

Mothers who are also business owners need their employees to anticipate needs and be proactive in helping out in order to keep the business up and running. 

“This is a large ask, especially if their employees are, like these business owners, parents,” Libin says. “Prior to COVID-19, 70 percent of mothers with children under 18 did paid work, and moms made up 47 percent of the workforce. In a country that has failed to provide mandatory paid leave, affordable health care, and ensure equal pay for equal work, asking employees to anticipate and preemptively react to the needs of their employer feels like a large request. But this need also speaks to the ways in which mothers who own businesses are not adequately supported. While it would undoubtedly be beneficial for these business owners to have employees who can read their minds, what entrepreneurial moms really need are systemic support systems at the local, state, and federal level. And, of course, another crucial part of any mom’s support system is her network of other moms—her community. Having access to other women in similar situations and stages of both life and career to lean on and turn to for advice cannot be underestimated.”

In general, women take on the bulk of child care duties. This is true even in households where both partners do paid work. 23 percent of working mothers want more help from their partners regarding child care. 

Mead says that for some women, this experience could be a wake-up call, “If they had an inkling that the distribution of work was ‘off’ or uneven in some way, working from home while juggling caring for the kids is likely going to be a reality check as women come to terms with the hard truth that the distribution of work at home is still far from equal.”

“[The balance of unpaid work] hasn’t changed in so many decades…or centuries even,” Mead says. “I think women don’t know how to make it change. The resources out there to get from the current distribution of work to a better place just don’t exist or aren’t meeting women and their partners where it’s helpful.”

Every working mother has different needs. The best way to know what types of support you can offer is by  asking and listening.

—Jennifer Swartvagher

Featured photo: JESHOOTS.COM on Unsplash

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We must continue to force ourselves to look at the bright side especially during these hard times of COVID-19. It is often easier to hyperfocus on the negative aspects since we are continuously flooded with “Debbie Downer” news stories. Before we know it, our anxiety and fear are heightened and then we have a hard time coming out of it on the other side. 

Tell yourself “ENOUGH!” Let’s practice letting in the light! A simple reminder of the good things we currently have going on in our lives is essential for positive mental health. This month, the students at my school are focusing on the character trait of “caring.” This trait encompasses many areas including gratitude for yourself and for others. Across the nation, we are also showing our appreciation for teachers since Teacher Appreciation Week falls during this month. And a bonus? The art of practicing internal peace and satisfaction releases endorphins that make us feel good about ourselves.

Phase One: Self-Reflection

Remember: you can’t help others unless you help yourself first. The act of practicing mindfulness can ease feelings of fear and loneliness, lower anxiety and impulsivity, and recharge your brain leading to better mental and physical health. When you are at ease with yourself and your thoughts, others will follow in the same demeanor. 

Here are some tips:

  • Carve out a chunk of time in your daily schedule.

  • Locate a physical area in your home that best allows you solitude.

  • Focus on your breathing.

  • Allow only 2 to 3 minutes to reflect on any negative thoughts.

  • Move into positive thoughts. Stay in the here-and-now. 

  • Express gratitude to yourself (positive affirmation statements).

  • Set a goal for how you will spread positive thoughts to others.

Phase Two: Pay-It-Forward

Once you have centered yourself, you can then move into the next phase of spreading the wealth. Positivity breeds positivity!

Think about what impact you can make on others and what areas you want to focus on dependent upon need. People often appreciate the smaller more thoughtful gestures, so don’t think you have to go big or go home! Just a simple smile while crossing paths with another person at the park can go a long way and change someone’s entire day. This week I am having my students write three kind notes to neighbors to leave in their mailboxes. It’s challenging not to feel recognized and appreciated when someone goes out of their way to do something nice for you.

If you don’t want to leave the house, there are many great ideas regarding virtual acts of kindness. You can even adopt a grandparent online and schedule daily or weekly chats with that individual. My heart is smiling right now just thinking about it! You can FaceTime with family members you haven’t been able to travel to see in a long time even before COVID-19. You can reconnect with friends and reminisce on past funny stories. There is no limit to the amount of creativity you can find to brighten someone else’s day. 

The more you open up your heart to yourself and others, the more light you let in and out to shine! Step back and show gratitude for all the awesome things going on in your life and all across the world! Your mental health depends on it!

 

Before joining Village, Dana worked in public education for fourteen years as a Special Education Counselor, Autism Coordinator, Special Education Supervisor, and Assistant Director of Special Programs. Throughout her educational career, Dana assists students, parents, and staff with the social/emotional component of learning. She enjoys spending time with family, traveling, and shopping.