Ahhh. The sweet sound of satisfying silence when the pacifier does its job soothing a fussy baby. But there’s a moment in many parents’ lives when they go from praising the pacifier for the peace and comfort it brings their child (and everyone else in the house) to nonstop worrying over their aging toddler’s attachment to the nuk. So we chatted with a pediatrician, a psychologist, and a child behavior specialist for their insights and tips on the right time and age to call it quits with the paci, and exactly how to do it. For all the parents out there who have ever wondered when to take the pacifier away, these pacifier-weaning tricks are for you.
But First: Why We Love Pacifiers
“Babies are born with an inherent need to suck—the sucking reflex,” says Lauren Crosby, MD, FAAP, of La Peer Pediatrics. Pacifiers do a great job of satisfying that need (and can even give a breastfeeding mom’s nipples a break) while also soothing a baby, especially during times when they’re upset or falling asleep. It has also been shown that using a pacifier can reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS), Crosby adds. Not all babies take to pacis, but those who do can really benefit from their simple magic.
Pacifier Weaning Tips
1. Time It Well
Saying goodbye to the binky can be done at almost any time, depending on what works for the baby and the parents or caregivers. But there are some key guidelines that experts recommend. According to Sari Broda, a certified child sleep consultant and certified lactation counselor, a baby’s strong desire to suck drops between 4 and 6 months. At that point, the pacifier becomes more of a soothing object and sleep cue than an actual need, so this is one window of opportunity where you may want to stop offering it. If you don’t ditch the paci in the first year though, Broda recommends waiting until the child is 3 years old; otherwise, taking it away can really disrupt your tot’s sleep. That being said, she has seen some families successfully drop the paci between 1 and 3 years without any major issues.
Crosby notes that using the paci past age 1 can delay speech and inhibit proper word articulation, and past age 3 may result in tooth alignment issues. If your child is getting frequent ear infections (studies have shown a correlation between the two), then you may want to get rid of it sooner. What’s more, some little ones wake throughout the night crying for the paci to be put back in. If that’s not working for your family, then you should feel empowered to stop using the pacifier. Just be sure to avoid the transition right before a major life event, like moving homes.
Licensed clinical psychologist Sarah Bren, Ph.D., urges parents to help their children prepare in advance for any kind of transition, whether it’s saying goodbye to a pacifier, starting a new daycare program, welcoming a new sibling into the family, or moving into a big kid bed. Talk about the feelings they might have and what they can do. “You might feel frustrated if you’re upset and want your pacifier. What can you do instead?” Involving children in the process helps them feel more in control and will tap into their early problem-solving skills.
This advice not only applies to older toddlers but to babies as well. “We need to talk to our kids about everything,” Broda says. “Even if it’s a 6-month-old… explain it to them.” Tell your baby that they’ll no longer be using the pacifier and that you know they’ll still be okay. Your baby may cry for a few nights or struggle to sleep, in which case you might want to do some sleep training, Broda says. But it shouldn’t drag on for weeks because it’s typically an easier transition to drop the paci before 12 months.
With older toddlers, you can have more of a dialogue, of course. Maybe tell a silly story about the pacifier and why it’s leaving your home, or give your kiddo a lovey blanket or stuffed animal for comfort, Broda suggests. Keep the conversation positive and upbeat.
2. Limit Use
If your child is using the pacifier all the time, you can start to limit it to sleep or stressful situations like doctor’s visits, Crosby says. Then you can either go cold turkey by cutting off the tip or acting as the binky fairy and taking the pacifier at night while leaving a gift for your child. If you prefer a more gradual approach, you can help your kid hold a favorite lovey and take deep “magic breaths” together, Crosby says. Or praise your child for their patience as you stretch out the time (first just seconds, then work up to minutes) before you hand over the pacifier. And be sure to do something supportive to help your child manage the waiting, like read together or play hand games.
3. Don’t Link the Pacifier to Being a Baby
As tempting as it may be to tell your child that pacifiers are for babies, don’t do it. They are going to want it sometimes, says Bren, and saying “You’re a big girl/boy now,” will just confuse them or make them feel ambivalent about it all. Normalize the fact that it’s a tricky process and you’ll remove the shame from the experience. And rest assured that this type of development can fluctuate. Your child will feel like a big kid one day and more like a baby the next. And that’s okay!
4. Allow Kids to Be Upset
As with any big change, you can expect your child to feel sad or mad about their pacifier not being readily available. Allow them to be upset, validate their feelings, and reflect it back to them before you plug them with a pacifier, Bren says. Try saying: “You’re feeling frustrated. I understand. We’re not going to have pacis right now. But we can [do another activity, like read a book, cuddle on the couch, hug your Teddy bear].” The idea is to move more slowly and mindfully and to give your child the time and space to feel a range of emotions rather than turn off their distress like a light switch.
And if your child is having a hard time, try to muster as much patience and empathy as you can, Crosby adds. Try to be consistent and calm, even as they’re upset. Then just keep yourselves busy with plenty of distracting activities.
5. Gather Your Support System
This is one of those times when it’s important to reach out to friends and family for support. You could let them know the transition you’re about to make and ask for advice or their help, whether that’s dropping off dinners for the week you’re pulling the paci or babysitting for a few hours while you catch a break.
6. Stick with the Plan
Consistency is very important, especially for older kids, so once you come up with a plan that works for your family, you should stick to it, Broda says. Provide your little one with a routine and predictable expectations to help ensure that saying goodbye to the paci is as quick of a process as possible.
If you’re struggling to get out the door with a baby for daily errands, you’re probably not considering a road trip, going camping, or even a flight any time soon. But taking a trip with a baby is actually easier than you think. And straight talk: Traveling with a baby is easier than with an older child, so get out while you can. Your baby just might be the most well-behaved traveler you encounter on your journey.
Plus, you’ll score some amazing memories, killer photos, and probably a few funny stories out of it. So if you’re dreaming of traveling, here’s why you should make it a reality now.
1. Babies sleep. A lot. If you anticipate your baby’s needs by scheduling regular feedings, cuddles and diaper changes, they’ll be mostly content to snooze as you explore your new surroundings.
2. Time goes so fast. Take these moments to travel while you can.
3. You usually don’t have to pay for your child’s seat on a train or airplane until age two. Just pop them on your lap, which is their favorite place to be anyway. They will also likely not have to pay an entrance fee at museums and other must-see attractions. Yep, that includes Disney theme parks.
4. Your child will see a whole new side of you, and experience a sense of wonder you can’t get from your regular routine.
5. You don’t have to pay for baby meals either. You may be lugging along some extra gear, like baby bottles or formula containers, but you’re not paying for an overpriced meal that an older child would say “All done!” to after eating only two bites.
6. You can be present in a different way than you can at home. You’re experiencing new things right along with your child, and there’s magic in sharing that sense of excitement and wonder together.
7. It’s hard to believe, but you have more flexibility now than you will when your child is older. Before you know it, your kiddo will be in school and enrolled in activities and your adventures will be restricted by those schedules. So enjoy that you only need to plan around adult schedules now.
8. Travel is the most fun way to learn that yes, you can do hard things as a parent. Packing for the trip, dealing with delays or other uncomfortable travel moments, resolving conflicts with your partner, all these things can happen. And while they’re what travel horror stories are made of, they’re also a way to impress yourself with how well you’re able to adapt, alter plans, speak in a foreign language, or comfort your child. It’s just one of the many ways travel enriches our lives.
9. Traveling is good for your relationship with your partner. Babies tend to become the main topic of conversation with your partner because they’re both super cute and super needy. And while traveling with a baby won’t change that, it will give you and your partner lots of new things to discuss, as well as memories you’ll treasure.
10. Fact: Sometimes babies cry on airplanes. And despite the horror stories you’ve heard, most people are nice about it. You’ll be surprised at how helpful other passengers, and especially flight attendants, can be to parents with little ones. From offers to walk with your baby up and down the aisle to bringing snacks for you, you’ll find a community onboard that’s ready to help you get through an in-flight meltdown. And if someone is a jerk? Well, you’ll never have to see them again.
11. Portability! Non-mobile babies are along for the ride. Pop them in a stroller, infant car seat, hiking front pack, or baby carrier, and they will nap and chill while you go off on adventures.
12. A non-mobile baby gets into less mischief in a new place than an older child would. Once you plonk them down someplace safe, you don’t need to worry about them putting something dangerous in their mouth, knocking over a fragile vase, or toppling down ungated stairs.
13. Once kids can walk and talk, they have a lot of opinions about what they want to do and when. Babies mainly want to spend time with you, so you get to decide where you go and what you do, provided you’re mindful of naps and mealtimes.
14. That first year can be a blur of sleepless nights, feedings, and diaper changes. Traveling with a baby gives you new and exciting things to focus on, which can up your mood and your energy level. That’s good for you, and it’s good for your baby to see you excited and experiencing things you love.
15. Everybody loves babies. Expect kindness from strangers, hotel staff, and restaurant managers as they go out of their way to help you and make sure you and your child get the most out of your travels.
16. It’s the best kind of quality time. Experiencing new things as a family builds special bonds that are hard to create at home, where you’re working and rushing through your regular routines.
17. Visiting new places is an education. Point out different colors in the woods or name landmarks in a city to develop your baby’s language skills.
18. In addition to language skills, exposing your child to new people, sights, sounds, smells, foods, languages, and scenery enriches their mind and their life. Take photos and videos so you can remind them of their baby adventures when they’re older. Kids love to hear about things they did when they were younger, and travel gives you lots to talk about, from funny memories to historical landmarks you saw and interesting people you met.
19. You’ll love seeing the world through your child’s eyes. Watching your baby experience sand or ocean waves for the first time is a memory you won’t forget. The same goes for snow, new foods, and visits with relatives who live too far away.
20. Getting away from your home and most of your stuff shows you in vivid detail how you can be happy and fulfilled with so much less, and that definitely includes baby gear. Yes, you’ll need to bring necessities like diapers, but you won’t need all the toys, all the outfits, all the stuff. Try this test: Give your baby an empty water bottle or magazine and you’ll see how a random object can hold a baby’s attention as well as a toy does.
21. You’ll spot things you wouldn’t have otherwise. Watch your baby intently looking at an animal they haven’t seen before or laughing at an unfamiliar sound, and you’ll develop a new appreciation for your surroundings and your child’s brilliant developing mind.
22. Perspective. Babies thrive on routines and schedules, which can be difficult to maintain during travel. If you’re the kind of parent who freaks out if you get off schedule (same!), seeing that you and your child can survive a time difference, a missed nap, sleeping in a different bed or other shifts to your routine can make you relax and be willing to take other worthwhile risks in the future.
23. Traveling with a baby teaches you to slow down and adapt when necessary. It’s harder to maintain an itinerary when traveling with a baby, but it can be incredibly valuable to take an unexpected break and sit while your child drinks a bottle or nurses. Or to leave a museum amid a baby meltdown and walk the grounds instead. Stepping out of your scheduled activities to adjust to your child’s needs can also open you up to experiences you wouldn’t have had otherwise. A later start time, taking a different route, or spending longer at one location can all lead to fortuitous surprises.
24. Self-care. Visiting a place you’re excited about and planning an enriching itinerary can make you feel like your pre-baby self again. And all new parents need that sometimes. Pro tip: Take turns with your partner to hang out with the baby during naps while the other parent slips out for some solo activities.
25. You’ll instill a love of travel and learning in your child. Even if your baby won’t remember the adventures you took when they were little, they’ll know that exploring the world is important to you and that can shape their own interest in new experiences.
We know you’re running around all day long. As moms, it’s a lot of constant jogging (both mentally and physically!) from task to task, kiddo to kiddo, practice to practice, work to home to the store…we totally know how it goes. And that can do a number on your feet. It seems like great shoes shouldn’t be a form of self care, but it really is. We don’t mean “great shoes” like the newest gorgeous-but-horribly-uncomfortable pumps that you saw on Insta. The best mom shoes look great and feel great.
It may feel like you’ve tried them all, but trust us; we have, too. We’ve had the blisters, the chafing, the swelling, the so-sore-they’re-numb toes. Putting our feet through it all so you don’t have to is what we’re here for. You have way too much going on (remember all that running?) to worry about finding the best mom shoes. We did the hard part for you. These are our favorite mom-ready shoes, from athletic to fashion to work to home, that we turn to every single day to keep us going.
Adidas Cloudfoam Pure Running Shoe
Adidas
When you slip into the cloud-like comfort of the Adidas Cloudfoam Pure Running Shoe, the name makes a lot of sense. With its lightweight construction and plush cushioning, it's perfect for all-day wear whether you're hitting the gym or running errands. Available in multiple colorways!
Made from sustainable materials like eucalyptus tree fibers, Allbirds Tree Runners are as eco-friendly as they are comfortable. The soft, breathable fabric and supportive insoles make them a go-to choice for busy moms on the move. They come in multiple colors, too.
Step into comfort with the Skechers Go Walk 5 Slip-On Sneaker. Featuring Skechers' signature Goga Mat cushioning and a flexible sole, these slip-ons are perfect for quick trips to the store or casual outings with the family. Available in 8 colorways.
Keep it classic with the Nike Tanjun Sneakers. Lightweight and breathable, these sneakers offer all-day comfort and versatility, whether you're taking a stroll in the park or chasing after your little ones at the playground. Plus, the easy on style makes them perfect for stepping in and heading out. Also available in classic and multiple colors.
You've definitely heard of the iconic comfort of Birkenstock Arizona Sandals, even if you've never owned a pair. Featuring a contoured footbed and adjustable straps, these sandals provide excellent support and stability for busy days on the go. There are a ton of different colors and style variations available, too!
From running errands to catching up with friends over coffee, it's hard to beat the classic comfort of TOMS Alpargata Slip-Ons. They get better as you wear them, and they come in a ton of colors and styles!
Elevate your everyday look with the Ecco Soft 7 Sneakers. Crafted from premium leather and featuring a cushioned footbed, these sneakers offer both style and comfort for moms on the move. There are so many colors and styles available, too.
You'll fall (not really) for the perfect blend of style and support with Vionic Kimmie Perf Slip-On Sneakers. Featuring a perforated leather upper and supportive footbed, these sneakers are ideal for all-day wear. 11 colors and styles available.
Step up your sneaker game with New Balance Fresh Foam Roav Elite Sneakers. With their Fresh Foam cushioning and sleek design, these sneakers are pretty much made for comfort and style for active moms.
Get ready for adventure with Keen Newport H2 Sandals. Designed for outdoor enthusiasts, these sandals feature a supportive footbed and water-resistant upper, making them perfect for beach days or hiking with the family. They're available in so many colorways, too.
Love 'em or hate 'em, it's hard to compare to the comfort and versatility of Crocs Classic Clogs. Lightweight, durable, and available in a huge range of colors, these clogs are perfect for slipping on and off during busy days at home or on the go.
Treat your feet right with the Reef Cushion Bounce Court Sandals. Featuring a cushioned footbed and soft, flexible straps, these sandals are perfect for beach days, poolside lounging, or everyday wear. They also come in 7 colors.
Lace up and hit the pavement (or the grocery store floor, or the field trip walking trail...) in the Saucony Cohesion 13 Running Shoes. With their supportive cushioning and breathable mesh upper, these shoes are perfect for moms who love to stay active. They're available in 13 colorways.
Give your feet some well-deserved TLC with Hoka One One Ora Recovery Slide. With their plush cushioning and supportive design, these slides are perfect for post-workout relaxation or playing in the backyard. They come in a bunch of colors, too.
Get ready for instant foot pain relief with Oofos OOriginal Sport Sandals. Featuring Oofos' proprietary OOfoam technology, these sandals absorb impact and provide some serious cushioning, making them perfect for tired, achy feet. Available in 15 colors.
All the products listed are independently & personally selected by our shopping editors.
If you buy something from the links in this article, we may earn affiliate commission or compensation. Prices and availability reflect the time of publication.
It’s a fact that moms usually focus their purchasing efforts on the rest of the family. Even on days like Mother’s Day, it’s not unusual to find moms shopping for their own moms, in-laws, and friends without thinking of themselves. We wanted to help lighten the load by putting together a list of the best gifts for every type of mom and mom-figure out there. Whether she’s into all things glam, prefers to keep it clean and simple, could spend all day reading (if she had time!), or is the best chef you know, we’ve got something to make her smile. And if you’re the mom in question? Well, you definitely deserve one of our favorites below.
Thin, delicate, and easy to wear with her favorite ring stacks, the Threadbare Stacking Ring by Catbird adds just the right amount of sparkle. According to Catbird, a certain American-actress-turned-princess with the initials M.M. who wears the Threadbare Ring every day would agree with us.
For the moms of both kiddos and pets, or pet moms who deserve some love on Mother's Day, too, this adorable pet sweatshirt can be customized with up to 5 of her fuzzy family members. Hand drawn from your photos by real artists, her pet's name(s) can also be included! Available in 4 colors.
Cowboy Carter Limited Edition Exclusive Cover Vinyl
Beyoncé.com
Queens (mom) recognize queens (Beyoncé), and Bey's 27-song album is a 2024 stunner. Paying homage to the Beatles, Chuck Berry, Willie Nelson, Dolly Parton, Linda Martell, and more, we'll be rocking it all summer (at least). The Limited Edition Exclusive Vinyl includes 2 translucent red vinyl discs in gatefold jacket, printed inner sleeves, and unique back jacket image. It's perfection, but we wouldn't expect anything less from Beyoncé.
Crafted by local artists in Spain, these dishes are painted in vivid colors using traditional techniques passed down by generations! They're available in 5 vibrant colors and include a salad bowl, medium bowl, salad plate, and dinner plate. Mix and match or keep it all perfectly matched. (We also made sure they're dishwasher and microwave-safe.)
Based on your favorite photo, this unique watercolor piece is a personalized illustration, hand-drawn by LETTERFEST's artists. Drawn in a freehand flowing line, the black and white portrait is overlayed over a splash of either duck-egg blue, moss green or blossom pink. Add a black, white, or oak frame for a gorgeous keepsake gift!
From beach to brunch, the River Guatemalan Palm Straw Hat by Gigi Pip is oozing with style. It also provides fantastic sun protection and comes in two colors, so we're confident mom will reach for this one over and over again!
'Undiplomatic: How My Attitude Created the Best Kind of Trouble' by Deesha Dyer
Amazon
Deesha Dyer's story of landing one of the most exclusive positions of Social Secretary in the White House under President Obama without any credentials or connections gives us goosebumps. This is an inspiring story embodies imposter syndrome, self-love, and learning innate self-worth. What mom wouldn't fully understand?
"Moved by the election of the country’s first Black president, Deesha Dyer applied for a White House internship in 2009 as a thirty-one-year-old part-time community college student, taking a leap that carried her into a permanent full-time position, followed by three promotions landing her at the epicenter of politics."
Seafoam Retro 80s Pastel Blocking Nintendo Switch Skin
Lux Skins Official
Help the gamer mom in your life protect her Nintendo Switch with this super fun retro-inspired pastel skin set! Choose from the hearts logo, classic logo, or leave it colors only. (Gaming system not included.)
This bag is a stunner! Crafted in smooth, yummy leather with sliding handles, it's the perfect size for mom to keep with her no matter where the day takes her. It's available in Honey (pictured), Chocolate, and Black.
We love that experience gifts are becoming so popular, and Tinggly's Experience Gift Boxes makes giving them super easy. Choose from over 10,000 experience gifts in 100+ countries including private food tours, hot air balloon rides, pottery classes, snorkeling, and so much more.
'Invincible' feels so appropriate for Mother's Day, doesn't it? The Nike Invincible 3 is ultra-cushioned, extremely lightweight, and is wider and taller than the original for even more stepping-on-clouds cushion to take mom from run to running errands. Available in a ton of colors, including the option to customize! Nike's Mother's Day Shop is also well worth checking out.
A unique candle is always a winning gift for mom! Fruity and earthy with scents of ripe tomato, green stem, and soil, this Heirloom Tomato Candle from Linnea is hand-poured with soy wax and double cotton wicks.
Wildflower Caramel Co. Dark Chocolate + Sea Salt Caramel
Wildflower Caramel Co.
If supporting a woman-owned small family business isn't enough, Wildflower Caramel Co.'s Dark Chocolate + Sea Salt Caramels are absolutely divine (and come in low-waste resealable packaging!).
Has the mom in your life jumped on the pickleball bandwagon yet? This customized pickleball set from Recess Pickleball includes 2 paddles, 1 box of pickleballs, and a bag, all designed by you! You can even customize a set of up to 8 paddles.
Let mom create her own little escape with this 3D Book Nook Puzzle Kit! It's such a sweet display that lights up to illuminate the small town filled with bookstores.
Each piece from Bea Bellingham is handmade in her Sydney, Australia studio. Crafted from clay and food-safe glazes, these big mugs are dishwasher/microwave safe and come in lots of different color combinations. You don't get to pick the color, either; part of the fun is seeing what gets picked for you in the design you choose!
We'll say it again: a. cheese. tower. With Quinby from Vermont’s Barn First Creamery, a brie-style goat cheese; silky triple-crème Fromager d’Affinois; and Afterglow, a goat cheese button washed with Wisconsin Red Ale. Just pair with crackers, jam, and a few strategically placed decorations and mom will be so impressed she might even share.
The Onsen Saru, or Hot Spring Monkey, brings with it a blend of sea salts and magnesium flakes scented with Japanese Matsu Pine and Cedarwood. Made in small batches, your favorite mom is going to love sinking into this soak.
Totally different from the chains we're used to seeing, this watchband-inspired anklet lays flat and would also look adorable with an anklet stacks! Also available in silver.
The Mother's Day Quencher H2.O FlowState 40oz Tumbler
Stanley
Colorful floral designs and tropical hues make the Stanley Mother's Day Collection an awesome addition to mom's collection. As with all FlowState tumblers, it keeps her drink cold for hours and is super easy to take with her anywhere!
'50 Years of Ms.' by Katherine Spillar & Gloria Steinem
Amazon
As created by the editors of Ms., this collection includes the best reporting, fiction, and advertising, decade by decade, as well as the best photographs, features, and iconic covers. There's also profiles, conversations with, and features by: Alice Walker, Cynthia Enloe, Pauli Murray, Nancy Pelosi, bell hooks, Eleanor Holmes Norton, Brittney Cooper, and Joy Harjo, as well as fiction and poetry by Toni Morrison, Joyce Carol Oates, Adrienne Rich, Rita Dove, Sharon Olds, and many others. This is such an epic collection that's sure to keep mom flipping pages!
Handmade chocolates from Racchiuti Confections are absolutely divine! They include flavors like Triple Sesame Praline and Tarragon Grapefruit with ingredients sourced from California farmers markets.
There's nothing more universally flattering than tortoise sunglasses, but the Number One Crazy Torts are dramatic and have an aviator green tinted lens that makes them wildly chic. They're effortlessly cool and look great on just about everyone!
This edgy bracelet flows and moves almost like liquid and features a clear hand carved Lucite and gold combination that goes with everything! It's like wearing a sculpture.
All the products listed are independently & personally selected by our shopping editors.
If you buy something from the links in this article, we may earn affiliate commission or compensation. Prices and availability reflect the time of publication.
Ask any parent what it’s like to raise a kid today, and we’d likely tell you modern childhood seems much more complex—and perilous—than when we were young. Thanks to increased peer pressure, massive technological advances, and on-demand access to virtually anything via click or tap, kids today face a wider array of choices and decision-making opportunities than we did when we were their age.
As parents, we hope we’ve instilled strong values and resilience in our children so they’re always able to make good decisions. But how can we be sure they’ll do the right thing, especially when we’re not around? While there’s no magic formula, here are 10 tips to help your kid make smart decisions—even when you’re not there.
1. Start conversations about smart decision-making early.
The earlier parents initiate conversations about how to make good decisions with their kids, the better. Explaining to your child what it means to make a good decision and why it’s important can set them up for future success. Kevin Zoromski, a psychologist and early childhood development expert says, “Give children choices as part of their day and as part of their typical routine. They will look forward to having some say over what they get to do in the household and you will establish their sense of responsibility as important decision-makers.”
2. Role-model smart decision-making behaviors.
Kids learn through observation and patterning the behaviors of people in their lives, especially their parents. Modeling good decision-making behavior will help reinforce your life lessons. Show your kid that you are honest, responsible, and accountable for your choices. “You are your child’s first and most important role model,” said mental health expert Ketsupa Jirakarn. “[Kids] are always observing and learning from you every day—even when you are unaware of it. So, make sure you practice what you preach.”
3. Set clear expectations and boundaries.
Let your kids know what you expect from them in terms of making smart decisions. For older kids, this could include things like always telling you where they are going, not using illicit substances like drugs and alcohol, and staying away from dangerous situations. “Children are more likely to accept the limits you set and are more likely to want to meet your expectations (i.e., be responsible) when you provide a warm, caring, and supportive relationship that underlies the discipline you impose,” according to a report from The Center for Parenting Education.
4. Practice makes perfect.
Give your child opportunities to practice smart decision-making. This could involve giving them small choices, such as what to wear to school or what to eat for dinner. It also could involve giving them bigger choices, such as whether to join a sports team or what to do with their allowance. By empowering your child to learn about the consequences of their choices through smaller actions, they will feel more empowered when making bigger decisions on their own.
When your kid makes a mistake, don’t immediately swoop in to fix the problem or resort immediately to punishment. Help them understand why a misstep was a consequence of not making the best decision, and then talk about how they can make a better choice next time. According to a report from the Harvard Graduate School of Education, “Reframing mistakes as opportunities from which we can learn—rather than failures alone—can help us feel like we are capable and in control. Reframing can also help us handle future mistakes more effectively.”
6. Develop their critical thinking skills.
Learning how to think critically and independently requires self-awareness (i.e., knowing strengths, weaknesses, and values) as well as problem-solving skills. Encouraging your child to think through a decision and come up with a solution can further nurture and develop their critical thinking skills. “In childhood and adolescence, the body goes through many physical changes, but there are also many changes in how we think, feel, and behave, and in our motivations,” according to a report from Frontiers for Young Minds. It’s through repeated trial and error that kids develop the necessary skills to thrive into adulthood.
7. Help them understand risks.
Some decisions have few consequences, while other decisions are highly consequential. Teaching your child the difference between big and small choices, and understanding the risks associated with some decisions will mitigate the chances of bad outcomes. For example, teach young kids about the risks of eating too much junk food or overdoing it with screen time, and teach older kids about the risks of cyberbullying and underage drinking.
8. Nurture emotional intelligence.
Talk to your child about the choices they’re facing and help them understand the different options and the potential consequences of each choice. Teaching them how to evaluate information, identify biases, and make informed decisions as well as helping your child understand and manage their emotions and how to make decisions that are in line with their values will serve them well. “Emotional literacy starts at birth when babies can just bond with [their parents] and connect on just that level. And it continues to evolve,” said Dr. Michele Borba, parenting expert and author of Building Moral Intelligence: The Seven Essential Virtues that Teach Kids to Do the Right Thing.
9. Be supportive and consistent.
As parents, being supportive and consistent with our reactions to our children’s choices will help ensure they make smart ones, even when we’re not present. If you sometimes let your child get away with making a bad decision, they will be less likely to take you seriously when you expect them to make good choices without you. Additionally, when your kid makes a good decision, be sure to praise and validate them. “Youth who experience more positive interactions with parents are better adjusted. Indeed, consistency in parenting—primarily consistency in discipline—has been linked to more positive youth outcomes,” according to a report from the National Institutes of Health.
10. Practice patience and understanding.
It takes time for kids to learn how to make smart decisions. Don’t get discouraged if they don’t always and immediately make the right choices. Even when your kids are old enough to make decisions themselves, they still need your patience and understanding. Be there to talk to them, offer advice, and help them deal with the consequences of their decisions.
When you’re a sleep-deprived new parent, how are you supposed to remember when you last fed your baby, how long they slept, or even when they were immunized and for what? Especially during those first few months when leaving the house freshly showered and in spit up-free clothing is considered a near miracle. Here’s the good news. You don’t have to. Some of the best baby tracking apps out there help exhausted parents stay on top of every milestone, feeding, diaper change, nap, and so much more.
With Baby+ parents can track their child's height, weight, and head circumference through interactive graphs, and log information on feedings, diaper changes, sleep, and new teeth to get a better understanding of baby's routine. You can also keep track of baby's milestones and upload photos, as well as help baby relax at night or during feeding time with lullabies and white noise.
Available for iOS devices and on Google Play.
2. Sprout Baby
You can use the Sprout Baby app to record your child's health history (illnesses, symptoms, temperature, medications), as well as to keep track of feedings, bottles, pumping sessions, and diapers. The app features a handy printable report with your child's health data that you can bring to doctor's visits. There's also a memories section for recording milestones and other special moments, which you can then export to an eBook.
Available for iOS devices.
3. Talli
Talli
This baby tracking app is a little bit different. It pairs with a stylish device that comes ready to track baby's sleep, bottle feedings, diapers, pumping, and more right out of the box. And it's customizable too, so you can determine which of baby's many activities you track. The companion app is fully integrated to let parents track all sorts of data, see trends, invite family members and caregivers to contribute, and view past events. It's also Alexa enabled, for those moments when you don't have your hands free.
Available for iOS and on Google Play.
4. Tinybeans
Yup, we've got an app! If you're looking for a secure place to store your baby photos, look no further than Tinybeans. You can edit pics before posting and share them with a select group of family and friends, who can comment on and join in the excitement of all your adorable new memories. The app will prompt you to post (to keep eager relatives appeased) and also track baby's developmental milestones.
Available for iOS and on Google Play.
5. BabySparks
This development tracker informs you when children typically learn specific skills, compiled from sources including the American Academy of Pediatrics and Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. BabySparks also provides activities you can do with your child to support this development. The activities are organized by the area of development: gross motor, fine motor, cognitive, speech, sensory, self-care, and social-emotional, so you can focus on a specific area if you prefer. The app also offers a paid subscription option so parents can access parenting classes.
Available for iOS devices and on Google Play.
6. BabyTime
BabyTime
All caregivers can track and record baby's activities in the BabyTime app. And since it's designed for one-handed operation, you can save all that valuable information while holding baby—a big plus. Track breastfeeding, bottles, sleep, and diapers, and use the slick charts to oversee baby's day or identify trends. There's also a night mode with a low-contrast background that's easier on your eyes.
Available for iOS devices and on Google Play.
7. Baby Connect
Baby Connect
Baby Connect records diaper changes, naps, moods, feedings, medicines, photos, and activities, and displays it in graphs and charts to help you identify trends. Multiple users can access your kid's info so your babysitter, Grandma, and other caregivers can see what baby has been up to and keep you updated, too. And the voice integrations mean you can record important information, even when your hands are full.
Available for iOS devices and Android.
8. Baby Tracker
Baby Tracker
Love knowing when every little thing happened and when it might happen again? Baby Tracker keeps track of every element of your baby's day, including sleep, feedings, and diaper changes. You may even discover your newborn's natural daily routines and nap schedule by comparing a week's or a month's worth of days. You can also track and record memories, growth, medical history, milestones, and more.
Available for iOS devices and on Google Play.
9. Baby Feed Timer
Baby Feed Timer
Nursing moms love the Baby Feed Timer app because you can record which side you fed your infant with last. Bottle-feeding parents love that you can keep track of just how much formula baby took each time. This baby tracking app will also tell you when it's time for the next feeding. Plus, it tracks diapers, pumping, medication administration, sleep, and solid feedings, making it useful past the first year.
Available for iOS devices and on Google Play.
10. Glow Baby
Glow Baby
This baby tracking app for the first year tracks developmental milestones, feedings, diapers, sleep, baby's ailments, medications, and more. Use Glow Baby's timers to manage feeding and sleep schedules, and then head to the in-app community to chat with other parents and share strategies and successes.
We all have an idea of what we’ll be like as parents, whether it’s influenced by a favorite social media expert or that trendy book on Scandinavian parenting. But you never really know what your parenting style will be until you welcome your first child—and so many factors can influence whether you stick to your plan or it all flies out the window. Seeing the world through your little’s point of view can inspire you to explore your own, and one fun way to do that is by diving into your unique natal astrology. While it’s just one piece of the complex puzzle that is your birth chart, your sun sign—the zodiac sign that the sun was moving through when you were born—can tell you a lot about your priorities, values, self-image, and confidence.
As an astrologer and the author of Raising Baby by the Stars: A New Parent’s Guide to Astrology, I’m passionate about teaching parents how to use astrology to learn even more about themselves. After all, getting to know yourself better can help boost your confidence as a mom or dad, and who doesn’t want a little more of that? So let’s dive in and look at each sun sign to explain how it colors your parenting style.
This fire sign is ruled by Mars, the planet of action and energy, so Aries are passionate, competitive, athletic parents who would ideally prefer to move through life at lightning speed. Keen to be seen as a trendsetter, you’re usually one of the first in your friend group to try the latest baby gear. And as the first sign of the zodiac, your youthful spirit also makes you a kid at heart. You find it easy to strike a playful note with your little one, diving headfirst into all kinds of games—ideally, ones where you can get moving, like relay races or Simon Says—or sending them into a fit of laughter with slapstick comedy. And should your child scribble on the wall with a marker or throw a toy at their sibling, you’ll swiftly let them know that you’re majorly aggravated. But you have zero interest in dwelling on problems that arise, so you’ll work with your kiddo on a solution and move on to the next thing ASAP.
Parents you’ll click with: Fellow fire signs Leo and Sagittarius share your adventurous, go-getter vibe, while air signs like Gemini and Aquarius can keep up with your zippy pace.
Parents you may butt heads with: Your direct, no-nonsense, speedy nature could clash with more emotionally sensitive Cancers, balance-seeking Libras, and slow, steady Capricorns. Whether you’re planning play dates with these parents or figuring out a carpooling schedule, you’ll do well to slow down a bit and remember that you’re more effective when you work as a team.
Taurus (April 21-May 20)
Born under Taurus, the fixed earth sign, you’re known for being loyal, dependable, and grounded. You move through life at an unhurried but steady pace and excel at working towards goals one pragmatic step at a time—whether you’re planning a family vacation or potty training. You enjoy being in nature and soaking up the world around you and your kiddo in a mindful way, using sight, smell, touch, taste, and sound to hear the birds and feel the breeze at your family’s favorite picnic spot or playground. And because Taurus is ruled by Venus, the planet of art, beauty, and relationships, you’re a people person who can easily befriend other parents in your child’s class and a dedicated friend who makes it a priority to keep in touch with your nearest and dearest for decades. As one of the fixed signs, you’re resolute and will see any parenting challenge through. But you can also be stubborn. Once you’ve honed in on a game plan for working with your kid on a milestone, it might be challenging for you to switch things up. That said, at times, making an effort to nurture your adaptability can make for smoother sailing, especially with your partner.
Parents you’ll click with: Fellow earth signs Virgo and Capricorn are pragmatic and enjoy making actionable, rational plans just like you, so together you’ll feel seen and productive. Meanwhile, water signs Cancer and Pisces share your appreciation for fostering heartfelt or creative moments with your kids.
Parents you may butt heads with: Anyone with their sun in the other fixed signs—spotlight-loving Leo, emotionally intense Scorpio, and group-oriented Aquarius—might be as hardheaded as you, which can set the stage for friction. But when you connect and collaborate with these parents, everyone can learn to be a bit more flexible and open-minded.
Gemini (May 21-June 21)
Since this air sign is ruled by Mercury, the planet of communication, Geminis are curious information gatherers. You revel in learning and sharing what you’ve learned with others, including your kiddo, with whom you’re bound to have super-animated conversations from the time they’re tiny. You’re also an adept listener, so as they grow up, you’re eager for them to fill you in on everything going on in their world. Storytelling and reading books with your child—perhaps about travel, given that Mercury rules transportation as well—has likely always been a beloved pastime. And because you thrive on lively interaction, you love making parenting a social experience, whether it’s signing up for group baby classes, FaceTiming with grandparents, hosting regular backyard BBQs, or taking a leadership role for your tween’s soccer team. As one of the mutable signs, you find it easy to switch gears, ditching an activity that just isn’t going anywhere for one that gets your kid all fired up. At the same time, you can struggle with indecisiveness and may be better off focusing your excitable energy on one task at a time.
Parents you’ll click with: You’ll find fast friends in fellow air signs Libra and Aquarius, who are equally sociable and cerebral, while fire signs Leo and Aries share your joie de vivre and action-oriented style.
Parents you may butt heads with: Fellow mutable signs Virgo, Sagittarius, and Pisces are just as adaptable as you but tend to have priorities that feel quite different from your own—Virgo is very invested in details, Sag cares about the big picture, and Pisces is deeply emotional. For that reason, you could struggle to connect, but tap into your endless curiosity, and you may find that seeing the world through their eyes proves enlightening.
Cancer (June 22-July 22)
If you were born under the water sign Cancer—ruled by the moon, which oversees emotions, intuition, and how a person nurtures and wants to be nurtured—you’re a natural-born caregiver. A sentimental and loving homebody, you crave a solid sense of security with your child and other family members. Cozy activities like baking, tending to pets, reveling in family traditions, or just plain snuggling up together tend to boost your well-being. Your friends can rely on you to be a compassionate listener with stellar advice on navigating parenthood, especially the emotional side of it. And working through tough issues with your child is definitely your forte. In fact, given your intuitiveness, you’re often capable of getting an accurate read on their experience and holding space for them to move through big feelings. That said, when you have sensitive moments, you might want to withdraw into your shell, pulling back from caring for others to look after your own emotional well-being. Being by or in the water can be especially therapeutic for you, given your element. As one of the cardinal signs, you’re a go-getter who naturally takes the initiative when something needs to get done, whether that’s working on the family budget or refreshing your kiddo’s wardrobe for a new season.
Parents you’ll click with: You’ll find you have lots in common with fellow family-oriented, empathic, emotionally intelligent water signs Scorpio and Pisces. And earth signs Taurus and Virgo share your passion for mindfulness and nurturing others.
Parents you may butt heads with: Fellow cardinal signs like airy Libra, lightning-paced Aries, and ambitious Capricorn are go-getters like you but tend to go about their initiative-taking in ways that aren’t nearly as emotionally charged as yours. However, by being open to a different approach and joining forces, you can accomplish a lot.
Leo (July 22-August 22)
Born under the fire sign Leo and ruled by the sun, which orients your self-image, you’re a parent who’s charismatic, confident, fun-loving, and driven. Whenever you’re faced with any challenge, whether it’s helping your kiddo process big emotions or setting important boundaries, you generally tap into your seemingly endless reserve of optimism and fierce motivation. At the same time, since Leo is associated with the Fifth House of Romance and Self-Expression, you find it easy to be playful, creative, spontaneous, and even theatrical at times. Because you revel in the spotlight and leadership positions, you’re often the entertainer of your parent-friend group and the one taking the reins on major PTA projects. With the sun’s influence, you’re passionate about encouraging your little one to proudly embrace who they are and feel empowered to share their opinions and feelings. You take great pride in holding space for your child to explore their identity and grow into the unique person they’re meant to be. As one of the fixed signs, you can get attached to certain ideas and routines, whether it’s your child signing up for certain extracurriculars or the family hitting a go-to summer vacation destination each year.
Parents you’ll click with: Fellow fire signs, Aries and Sagittarius, excite you with a take-charge, zippy, passionate approach that is much like your own. And air signs Gemini and Libra are as interested in being on the go and connecting with others as you are.
Parents you may butt heads with: Parents with their sun or other placements in the other fixed signs—slow-and-steady Taurus, intense Scorpio, and community-minded Aquarius—are all apt to dig their heels in like you, which means you could find yourselves at an impasse due to a lack of flexibility. Doing your best to be open to compromise is key.
Earth sign Virgo is ruled by Mercury, the planet of communication and information gathering, so you’re a research-savvy, thoughtful, detail-oriented parent with a penchant for planning (you’ve got the lists to prove it!) and taking pragmatic steps to hit your goals. You’re excited by diving into all the studies and articles you can find on a given parenting subject, from the best double stroller to ways to prevent summer slide. And for that reason, your friends and loved ones often lean on you for your advice. Associated with the Sixth House of Wellness and Daily Routine, you’re analytical and health conscious, confidently prioritizing everyday details—like making colorful, healthy meals for your kiddo and working with them to keep their space tidy—to help improve your family’s overall well-being. You also show you care through simple, thoughtful actions, like putting a sweet note in your child’s lunch. And given your Mercurial influence, you’re a bookworm at heart and likely have been since you were little, so you aim to share your love of language with your child through bedtime reading sessions or even making up your own stories together. As one of the mutable signs, you can be indecisive and worrisome but often navigate challenges by tapping into your innate adaptability.
Parents you’ll click with: Fellow earth signs Taurus and Capricorn are on the same page when it comes to being practical, goal-oriented, and, well, down to earth. You’ll also see eye-to-eye with thoughtful, nurturing Cancers, and analytical Scorpios.
Parents you may butt heads with: Parents with their sun or other placements in the other mutable signs—buzzy Gemini, philosophical Sagittarius, and spiritual Pisces—are as flexible as you but might also have priorities that are counter to your own. Giving yourself permission to focus on the forest instead of the trees could boost mutual understanding.
Libra (September 23-October 22)
Libra is an air sign ruled by Venus, the planet of art and relationships, which makes you an incredibly social parent who deeply values balance and beauty. You will go to great lengths to keep the peace and avoid conflict with your child and other loved ones. So, if your kid is having a complete meltdown, you’re generally a pro at keeping your cool and speaking in a calming, hushed tone (to a point, of course). You’re also quite conscious of how your child’s space contributes to their emotional well-being, so you put a lot of thought into the color of their nursery or the art hanging in your tween’s room. And because Libra is associated with the Seventh House of Partnership, you’re naturally inclined to connect with your kiddo, your partner, or your bestie one-on-one. You love any opportunity to join forces with another person and work towards hitting a goal together. In fact, as one of the cardinal signs, you’re more of a go-getter than you might initially let on. You’re particularly driven to bring people together, hosting super-memorable birthday parties or neighborhood gatherings. And your parent friends can count on you to plan a playdate for the kids that’s enriching and fun, whether it’s a fun painting project or a trip to that pretty new cafe in town.
Parents you’ll click with: Other air signs, Gemini and Aquarius, are equally social and cerebral, so you’re practically guaranteed some lively conversation. And with their eagerness to connect with other parents and engage with the world around them, you’ll also find fire signs Leo and Sagittarius enlivening.
Parents you may butt heads with: You can appreciate the initiative taken by other cardinal signs—direct and sometimes brash Aries, sensitive Cancer, and industrious Capricorn—but you’re not quite sure you’re on the same wavelength.That said, you could also be impressed by their unique motivations.
Scorpio (October 23-November 21)
You’re driven, private, shrewd, family-oriented, and capable of swimming in the deep end of your emotions as a parent, having been born under the fixed water sign Scorpio, which is co-ruled by action-oriented Mars and transformative Pluto. Given that Scorpio is associated with the Eighth House of Emotional Bonds, you’re capable of setting the stage for meaningful bonding time with your little one as a result of your emotional intelligence, ability to feel viscerally and deeply, and desire to connect with those you cherish on a heartfelt level. As one of the fixed signs, you’re dedicated to loved ones, which means you always have a group of parent friends who you’ll lean on for advice and who lean right back on you. You’re also steadfast and resolute, the flip side of this quality being that you might find it tough to divert from a set game plan or tradition. If you had your mind set on your child playing a certain instrument or the whole family celebrating the winter holidays in a particular way and shake-ups occur, you could end up really frustrated. Finding ways to go with the flow can boost your inner peace.
Parents you’ll click with: Cancer and Pisces, the other two water signs, are equally intuitive and in tune with their emotions, so you’ll easily hit it off with them. Earth signs Virgo and Capricorn are similarly astute and motivated to move toward a successful endgame.
Parents you may butt heads with: While you respect how other fixed signs—slow-and-steady Taurus, fiery Leo, quirky Aquarius—are as apt as you to dig their heels in, being equally obstinate can make for gridlock. If you can make room for each of your unique styles, you’ll be quite a productive pair.
Sagittarius (November 22-December 21)
Born under the mutable fire sign Sagittarius, ruled by Jupiter, the planet of abundance and fortune, you’re a gregarious, free-spirited, glass-half-full, adventurous, and fun-loving parent. You deeply value soaking up knowledge as well as broadening your horizons by moving beyond the mundane and comfortable. This means you’ll often be the first parent to bring your little one along with you on vacation—even long-distance trips—or to sign your child up to learn a different language. Globe-trotting is something you absolutely daydream about and prioritize, so you enjoy trying a wide variety of world cuisines with your kiddo and taking advantage of any opportunity to learn about other cultures. You’re a straight shooter who tells it like it is, which can be helpful in setting expectations for your kid. The only thing is, if you have a sensitive child, you may do well to opt for a softer tone. As a mutable sign, you’re endlessly adaptable and up for going with the flow, but might also benefit from experimenting with sticking to a set game plan and holding definitive boundaries.
Parents you’ll click with: Fellow fire signs Aries and Leo share your excitability and passion for life, so you’re sure to have a blast together. You’ll also connect with Libra and Aquarius parents who are always down for some lively socializing.
Parents you may butt heads with: The other mutable signs—lighthearted Gemini, service-oriented Virgo, and deeply empathic Pisces—are flexible like you but might confuse you with their different focuses. If you trade notes, though, you could find you have more in common than you realized.
Capricorn (December 22-January 21)
Traditional, pragmatic, driven to succeed, and eager to put your nose to the grindstone to achieve whatever you set your mind to, you were born under the earth sign Capricorn. Accordingly, it’ll come as no surprise that Caps are ruled by Saturn, the planet of hard work, commitment, and boundaries. As a cardinal sign, you excel at taking the initiative, whether that’s signing up to coach your kid’s softball team or managing ticket sales for the school play. And since you’re associated with the Tenth House of Career and Public Image, you appreciate being recognized by your peers for your persistent efforts. This trait also means you’re especially capable of modeling diligence and work ethic for your littles. And given your Saturnian influence, setting and holding boundaries is also a strength. Your child will feel particularly secure and safe because of the rules you set and stick to. Since you respect and admire your elders, teaching your little ones about their roots and family history is important to you—and can greatly benefit their eventual self-exploration.
Parents you’ll click with: Fellow earth signs Virgo and Taurus are similarly dedicated to rational thought and tackling any parenting issue with a practical, step-by-step plan. And you’ll find that water-sign Scorpios and Pisces inspire you to get in touch with and tap your emotional and spiritual side to turn your aspirations into reality.
Parents you may butt heads with: Fellow cardinal signs—fast-paced Aries, sentimental Cancer, and social Libra—might also love to hit the gas on new undertakings, but their strategies differ a great deal from yours. That said, by working together and leaning on one another’s strengths, you’ll go far.
Aquarius (January 22-February 18)
Quirky, humanitarian, forward-thinking, and science-minded, you were born under the fixed air sign Aquarius, co-ruled by Uranus, the planet of rebellion, revolution, and sudden change, and Saturn, the taskmaster planet. You’re incredibly proud to be individualistic. But as airy and progressive as you may be, your fixed quality can pop up in the form of black-and-white thinking that can leave you feeling a bit stuck. Leaning on others could be the solution to moving through that feeling, given that Aquarius is the sign associated with the Eleventh House of Groups. You value team efforts, community, and connecting with a diverse group of parent friends, so it’s very important to you that you find your village. And when you’re not leaning on others and working as part of a group (think: organizing a nanny share for you and your neighbors), you’re leaning into your tech savvy to solve problems using the latest apps. This may also mean that you prioritize trips to science museums, STEM activities, and reading with your kiddo about famous scientists like Katherine Johnson and Albert Einstein. And because community is so important to you, you’ll also want to empower your child to use their unique voice to make a difference, bringing them along with you when you dive into volunteer and charity work.
Parents you’ll click with: Fellow air signs Gemini and Libra get your intellectual, people-oriented style, so you’re at least apt to strike up some stimulating conversation. And you’ll also find harmony with on-the-go Aries and jubilant, free-spirited Sagittarius.
Parents you may butt heads with: While you appreciate that other parents with fixed signs—comfort-craving Taurus, self-focused Leo, and intimacy-seeking Scorpio—are as resolute as you are, you might feel like they’re just not on your wavelength. Still, working to be more flexible can set everyone up for a win.
Pisces (February 19-March 20)
Intuitive, sensitive, perceptive, and a bit psychic, you were born under the mutable water sign Pisces, which is ruled by Neptune, the planet of spirituality, and Jupiter, the planet of luck and abundance. You’re innately artistic and can easily channel your deeply felt emotions into a creative project, whether that’s painting, dancing, singing, or playing an instrument, and this is a skill you’ll be excited to model for your child. One of the mutable signs, you’re able to float from one activity to the next with your little one, but you might struggle to pin down a set routine or schedule that could benefit you all. Your Neptunian influence and Pisces’ association with the Twelfth House of Spirituality also makes you something of a dreamer at heart, so any opportunity for escapism with your little one—like watching a fantasy movie or reading a book bursting with whimsical, magical themes—brings you a great deal of joy. You’re also highly adept at picking up on your child’s emotions, doing your best to offer a helpful solution when they’re struggling. You’ll do well not to overidentify with stress that isn’t your own, as you could easily lose yourself in that experience. Offering yourself the same kind of tender loving care you unconditionally give others is a must.
Parents you’ll click with: Fellow water signs Cancer and Scorpio are in tune with their deepest-rooted emotions, which makes you feel truly understood when you’re spending time together. Earth signs Taurus and Capricorn might be more pragmatic than you but inspire you to make your dreams a reality.
Parents you may butt heads with: You and other mutable signs—social Gemini, analytical Virgo, and philosophical Sagittarius—might share the ability to change course at a moment’s notice, but you feel like you have different priorities. Still, you’re all very open-minded, which means that as long as you’re willing to listen, you can learn a lot from one another.
It’s hard to believe that little one, who used to fit snugly in the crook of your arm, is finally ready for kindergarten… or are they? Maybe you should wait another year? After all, what is the right kindergarten age? Especially since the practice of “redshirting” kids—giving them an extra year before starting kindergarten (making them one of the oldest as opposed to the youngest)—has risen in popularity. But like most trends in the parenting world, it leaves parents wondering if it is a good idea. That’s why we looked at the studies and asked experts to weigh in on what is the right age to start kindergarten. Here’s what we found.
Getting Kids Started in Kindergarten
The preschool years are over and it’s time to start kindergarten. But where do parents start? Where we do with all things—online and by asking other parents. Now is the time to check out your local school’s website or find and join parent Facebook pages or other social media accounts associated with the school. Other suggestions include talking to parents with older kids and asking your preschool teacher about local schools and expectations. There are lots of resources out there for parents with inquiring minds.
Kindergarten First-Year Enrollment
Although kindergarten enrollment varies from state to state, parents can expect to encounter some similar requirements no matter where they live. Here are a few universals:
In most states, kids must turn five years old by a certain date, usually September 1.
Many schools require kids to have certain vaccinations before starting school; check with your district about specific requirements.
Most will ask for proof of residence. A utility bill or other piece of mail works fine.
You may be asked to provide a copy of your child’s birth certificate to enroll.
What Do Kids Learn in Kindergarten?
Although the curriculum varies from district to district across the country, parents can count their kindergartners learning the alphabet, sight words, phonics, and basic sentence structure as part of Language Arts. Math covers basics like number recognition, counting, addition and subtraction, measurement, and basic geometry. Additionally, hands-on activities and play-based learning help kids learn about real-world concepts like weather, plants, and animals. But many would say the most important things kids learn in kindergarten support their social-emotional growth (or soft skills) like building relationships, solving conflicts, and developing empathy and self-awareness.
What is the difference between Transitional Kindergarten (TK) and Transitional to Elementary School (TES)?
Transitional Kindergarten (TK) is a two-year public school program designed for kids who turn 5 between September 2 and December 2 of the school year. It provides an additional year of instruction, focused on developing social-emotional skills, language and literacy, math, and physical development, to support kids who may not be ready for kindergarten.
Transitional to Elementary School (TES) is a program offered by preschools or childcare centers to prepare children for kindergarten. It typically focuses on language and literacy, math, social-emotional development, and basic self-help skills so kids can successfully transition to the academic and social expectations of kindergarten.
Your kid will (probably) be more willing to sit still if given an extra year.
Whether or not your five-year-old will sit still during circle time or stay on task at writing centers (or at home) may depend on their age, since younger children generally have a harder time doing both. Studies have shown that kids are often misdiagnosed with behavior problems in kindergarten when in fact, the behaviors are just a matter of being younger than classmates. And, according to this Stanford University study, children who wait a year to enroll have significantly lower levels of inattention and hyperactivity—with results continuing even at age 11.
Your kid may be misdiagnosed with ADHD if they start too early.
All those wiggles in the classroom may have some unintended consequences for kids regarding the right age to start kindergarten. A 2018 study published in the New England Journal of Medicine found that kids who turned five the month before starting kindergarten were more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD than those who started the month that they turned six. "Our findings suggest the possibility that large numbers of kids are being overdiagnosed and overtreated for ADHD because they happen to be relatively immature compared to their older classmates in the early years of elementary school," said study author Timothy Layton, an assistant professor of health care policy at Harvard Medical School, in this article for Education Week.
An older child will probably have an easier time saying goodbye to you.
Younger kids—especially those who haven’t attended a preschool program—may have a tougher time saying goodbye in the morning (and we all know how hard it is to leave a tearful tot at drop-off). Giving your child more time to become independent may help her let go when it’s time for the school day to start. with the in-home model of learning most schools will use this year, it may be challenging to start a drop-off situation mid-year should children resume in-class learning.
Their fine motor skills will be more developed.
Older kids usually have an easier time with fine motor activities (holding a pencil and using scissors, for instance). Doing these things can help build confidence and make a kid more excited about their accomplishments at school.
They have more time to be kids; you have more time with them.
Waiting to start formal schooling gives kids more time to be kids, to enjoy a more leisurely day, and to play freely (which, studies have suggested may be more valuable than academics for young children). Delaying kindergarten also gives you one more year with your child. If you're lucky enough to be home with your kiddo, you'll be glad you got that time.
An older child may be taller than their classmates; that matters (especially in middle school).
You may not be thinking about the teen years yet, but let’s not forget: A child who is the oldest kid in kindergarten will also be the oldest in her middle school grade—and that’s no small thing, especially when puberty hits.
They may be bored (and consequently misbehave).
This study has suggested that kids who delayed kindergarten were twice as likely to drop out of high school. Researchers think this is because they reach adult age sooner, which is when kids are legally allowed to quit school on their own (most state laws require kids to stay in school until at least age 17).
That extra year may be expensive.
If you’re a working parent, delaying kindergarten means another year of paying for childcare or preschool. And, with the average cost of preschool as high as more than $10,000 per year in some states (according to this study from the Economic Policy Institute), it’s an expensive wait.
They may not find peers on their level (initially).
A year can make a big difference when you’re only still in your first decade of life. This means a calm, more introverted six-year-old may have trouble finding like-minded peers in a kindergarten class full of rowdy five-year-olds.
It may not matter in the long run.
Despite conflicting research and strong opinions on both sides, it is still unclear whether “redshirting” makes any difference in the long run. Some studies even suggest that, whether your child starts school a year early or a year late, it all levels out by the middle school years.
With all that information, you’re probably still wondering: What is the right age to start kindergarten? The answer: Both. It depends on the kid.
“Kids should be with developmental age peers as much as possible since kindergarten builds not just academics but social skills, too,” said Deanna Lapen, a Los Angeles-based school psychologist and former kindergarten teacher. “With that being said, every child is an individual. Parents should think about why they would consider redshirting.”
Lapen said parents should talk with their child’s preschool teacher (if applicable) as well as look at the kindergarten curriculum for whatever school their child might attend. Then ask: “Is the upcoming kindergarten class a place where the child will thrive socially and academically?”
If so, don’t delay. And, as always—trust your instincts.
Somehow, 2024 is absolutely flying by. Summer break is around the corner. It feels like we’ve been going, going, going since December. If you’re finding yourself starting to feel a little more stress than you were expecting as the weather warms up, we fully understand. Aside from really encouraging you to do your best to focus on self-care, hydrating, and getting the rest you need, we’ve got another idea. We want to give you a little stress relief inspo with the ultimate in stress relief: a mom-friendly getaway. And for that, you’ll need a relaxing vacation rental.
Doesn’t seem possible? It is. We promise. You don’t have to book a week at a resort in the Bahamas to unwind (although if you do, we’d love to join you!). Sometimes a weekend away is all we need to get our bearings and recharge. Of course, if you’re already feeling spread a little thin, you probably don’t want to do the research on that. And that’s where we come in! Whether it’s a trip for two or somewhere for the whole gang (and their crew!), we’ve set you up below. These are the best mom-friendly relaxing vacation rentals out there to help get you balanced, grounded, and fully refreshed.
Freehand Cellars Airstream | Wapato, WA
Airbnb
The Airstream is iconic, so this is a definite Bucket List rental! Add the location (steps away from Freehand Cellars Tasting Room and surrounding Yakima Valley) and the amenities (hot tub and views) and you get an epic getaway.
If peace and quiet is your jam, the Bell-Zwart Lodge surrounded by rolling hills, lakes, and 59 miles to Yosemite National Park would be perfect. Plus: cows.
Leaf Treehouse at HoneyTree Farm | Fredericksburg, TX
Airbnb
A grown-up tree house nestled in the Texas live oaks, just 10 minutes from historic Fredericksburg, TX? Add a reading nook, hot tub, rain shower, and beautiful views, and you have one magical stay.
This one is ready for the whole crew! It sleeps 16, so a girls trip or extended family vacation would easily fit. 20 minutes away from everything, a saltwater infinity pool, tanning shelf, swim-up bar, and Palm Desert vibes? We're there.
Guests: 16+ (bring all your friends!) Cost Per Night: $438.00/night
This is a one-of-a-kind destination on 80 acres of secluded land in Moab on the Crooked Bindi Ranch! Furnished with luxury hotel-grade beds and linens and complete with a private bathroom built into the red rock landscape itself, it's luxe with a wild streak.
The A-Frame at Creekside Dwellings | Beach City, OH
Airbnb
A sweet spot near Amish Country, this A-frame home offers privacy, views, and a hot tub. Rustic on the outside, bright and breezy on the inside. Oh, and that hot tub...
Another larger property for a group getaway, this luxury cabin is absolutely loaded with amenities! A 16ft deck, hot tub, built-in grill, and incredible views are all included, and then some.
The epitome of modern, the updated inside is just as fabulous as the outside! This home has a private yard with 8ft privacy fence, 25'x25' basketball court, putting green, horseshoes, and more.
Updated Retreat with Saltwater Pool | Kissimmee, FL
Airbnb
If the stunning pool, game room, and community playground aren't enough, this property is just 5 miles from Disney World! If you idea of relaxation is being surrounded by all your friends and family and lots of sun and fun, this retreat is a win.
This beauty was featured on the Design Network's Tiny BnB, it's a nature-lover's dream destination! The open-air porch features a wood-burning stove, and the property boasts a hot tub, fire pit, and nearby hiking trails.
This level of serenity is unmatched. Both rustic and modern, this studio-style rental is 15 minutes from the Taos Plaza and right under the vast starry skies!
We're loving the El Prado, NM properties, mostly because of the views! This is such a unique rental created with a modified shipping container, surrounded by mountains, and close to town and all the adventures it offers.
Hawkeye Dome was featured on the May 2019 cover of Dwell Magazine, so you'll understand why it was so hard for us to pick just one picture to feature! This dome-style rental feels off-the-grid and luxurious and is close to hiking, views, and feels like your own little oasis.
Nestled in the middle of the Alberta Arts District in Portland, this adorable tiny home is at the heart of all the action. You won't have to go far (though you might not even want to! This house is so lovely inside, too.)
We didn't think we'd ever put "romantic" and "shipping container" in the same sentence, but here we are! This rental includes a heated pool, rooftop deck, and is only 30 minutes from The Woodlands and an hour from Houston.
Featured in The Washingtonian, this A-frame sits in the Shenandoah Valley. Of course that means stunning views come with the home, along with access to wineries and breweries, hiking, biking, and so much more!
This home, designed by Norwegian architect Bernardo Rostad, sits at the base of the Great Smoky Mountains National Park. It's definitely for those looking for a truly rustic experience with a spring-fed pool and hot tub!
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With only 122 rooms at Sea Breeze Beach House, you may arrive a stranger, but the staff does a great job of making you feel like you are part of the family. The property feels more like a “Beach House” than a resort, which means it’s full of authentic Bajan charm, with no corporate veneer. This 4-star, boutique all-inclusive resort in Barbados is a great option for American families looking for a relaxing beach stay with great food, staff, and water play options.
The room at Sea Breeze Beach House delivered beyond our expectations, and we’ll never forget the sound of our giddily squealing children as they entered the room for the first time. We stayed in an Ocean View Room with 1 King and Sofa Bed, which offers plenty of space and comfort for two adults and two children. We enjoyed the design aesthetic of the room as it was a departure from the modern neutrals we are seeing as standard in a lot of bigger hotel chains these days. The room was chic, with contemporary coastal style and elegant pops of turquoise. We also enjoyed the walls being dressed with paintings by local Bajan artists. The room made us feel like we were in Barbados, which is exactly how we want to feel on vacation!
Sea Breeze Beach House/Anne Hatfield
As far as in-room amenities, we were greeted by a selection of cool drinks and snacks, which were refilled for us daily. Most notably, we enjoyed the bath robes and the private balcony overlooking the beach. As the kids took their afternoon naps, we slouched into the recliners on the balcony with our books. Then, come night, we slept like babies hearing the peaceful crashing of the waves outside our balcony.
The Amenities at Sea Breeze Beach House
Sea Breeze Beach House/Anne Hatfield
The property is set on 1,000 feet of powdery white-sand beach, and the beach is the #1 draw to stay at The Sea Breeze Beach House. The setting of the beach is calm and quiet, and there is loads of space to stretch out. For those looking for some activity, there are a few floating trampolines in the water, and snorkels, boogie boards, paddle boards, and kayaks to use at your heart’s content
For those who like to complement beach time with pool time, the pool area is relaxed and spacious, with both a family pool and an adult pool. There is food and drink service at both pools, and the staff is very attentive in ensuring needs are met. We enjoyed the ice cream bicycle cart that stopped by the pool mid-morning and mid-afternoon offering popsicles as a refreshment.
We didn’t get to experience the Spa, but it recently opened, so for parents looking to get some self-care scheduled while on holiday, Sea Breeze Beach House now offers some spa pampering.
Kids Club at Sea Breeze Beach House
Sea Breeze Beach House/Anne Hatfield
Families feel right at home at Sea Breeze Beach House, and the Kids Club and Games Lounge are programmed with indoor and outdoor activities for children 4+. For children under 4, parent supervision is required in the Kids Club. The Kids Club itself is a bit dark and tired, but the new General Manager assured us that the Kids Club was going to be given a modern refresh in the coming weeks.
Sea Breeze also offers in-room babysitting, which we took advantage of, and our children were happy as can be with the babysitters. We arrived back to the room to find them laughing and playing together like old pals. Most importantly, the babysitters made us feel safe, and like they genuinely enjoyed being with children.
The Food at Sea Breeze Beach House
Anne Hatfield
As for the food and drink, rest assured, there is a lot of it, and it’s quite good. The parents enjoyed made-to-order omelets for breakfast, and make-your-own salads for lunch, and the kids were happy with pancakes and pasta. Our most memorable meal was the seafood buffet at the Mahogany Lounge on the Saturday night of our arrival. We couldn’t believe our eyes. There was literally a boat filled with fresh fish! With children in tow, Mahogany Lounge is the best choice for dining; but admittingly, after eating there every day for breakfast, lunch and/or dinner, it starts to lose some of its initial appeal. We also tried Cerulean and Aqua Terra, and we were happier with the food at Mahogany.
Lastly, we’ll end with something interesting that we didn’t know before our visit. Brits make up the largest percentage of travelers to Barbados every year, and that was certainly the case at Sea Breeze Beach Hotel, too. So, a trip to Barbados can give American families a 2-for-1 value in terms of cultural immersion as you get immersed in both Bajan and British culture. And if you come back saying “Hello, mate,” don’t say we didn’t warn you!
If you’re looking for a more intimate destination to enjoy a family vacation, then we recommend booking a trip to Sea Breeze Beach Hotel in Barbados. And make sure you don’t miss the fresh fish buffet on Saturday evenings!
Editor’s note: This trip was paid for by the destination, but all opinions belong to the writer.
